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Navajo wrote the most beautiful diary yesterday but she did not know the whole story  about the meetup as Vet would not let me tell you guys.  He was afraid it would interefere with the Florida meetup.  Now....that meetup was gonna happen but DaNang and Ole Hippie chick and Jax Dem can verify that It almost did not happen at the last minute.   I am one stubborn individual and I was almost in tears 18 hours before the meetup but IRL the folks, even without knowing the whole story of what had transpared just a day earlier was there to hug me.   I highly suggest you folks organize meetups.  It may save your life and sanity.

Thursday morning, before I took the kid to school, vet had to go to the store.  1 mile or less up the road.  He was doing fairly well for the past month or so.   He went to grab a sausage biscuit before I left with the again only vehicle.  Same vehicle.  97 Ford Lincoln. (old car).  I waited and waited and I could see my little girl was going to be late for school.  He promised me that after that last incident he would never drive further than the store and he has kept that promise.  Now he won't drive at all.  
Thursday morning, the phone rang and he asked me for our insurance info.  I thought, I wonder if he was speeding.   He could not find it in the glove compartment.  I gave it.
He comes home and the whole front end of the car is smashed in.

I am in panic mode and ask him what happened and he was limping again.   I send the little out of the room to get details from him of what went wrong.   He told me that he had been a victim of road rage.  He did not say it that way but that is what happened.   There is a middle school not even half a mile from the house and he is careful to obey the speed limit of 25.  Me...I must admit will speed some through there. 30 maybe.   He calls me down if this happens.  He is terrifed of hurting kids and feels it is too dangerous to speed with a school zone, double yellow lines, kids crossing and flashing lights along with a digital read out sign telling you your speed.

A guy got behind him and started blowing the horn.   He was doing 23.   He laid on the horn.  Jack is very prone himself to rage if he feels like he is being pushed but he knew he was in a school zone.   He taps his brakes.   This guy is angry and goes around him on a double yellow line and passes while blowing the horn then stops short by slamming on his brakes.  Jack hit him in the back.   The guy who is about 6 ' 4 and 250 lbs and much younger gets out with attitude.   This is until Jack gets out not happy and is wearing his shirt with emblems saying 101st Vietnam, etc.    Jack says,  'YOU GOT A PROBLEM"?   The guy backs down completely but apologizes and says I am sorry, was in a hurry, and this could have been worse, trust me.  Jack calmed down and the guy didn't want to call the police since he said his car was not hurt.  This was the beginning ......follow me below the squiggly

I think...Gordon has left from Virginia.  People have cooked.  We have rented a building .   We have about 20 or 30 people coming in less than 48 hours and we have no car.  DaNang has to be picked up at the airport and we have no car.  I can't put that car on the road.  Jack is now in terrible pain .  The insurance company calls as the bully called the insurance company ( a car that has no damage) just a little to the bumper .   The police were not called because Jack and he exchanged info and I think Vet was shook up pretty good from trying to control his temper and the actual wreck.
The guy had given him a phony name.   The insurance company he has is the same one we have.  The claims believed Jack's side of the story and I am talking to the Claims dept as well.  Jack call his therapist.  He knows how much this meetup meant.
He holds his pain and anguish internally but I did see through it.  The insurance company gets me a rental and picks up my car.  I have no clue where everything is on this vehicle and have to drive to Gainesville which is 130 miles round trip to pick up DaNang and get last minute details done including cooking.

 DaNang and I both have been very angry about the stigma that follows PTSD vets.   The insurance company now wants to know if he was taking meds, etc.  He was not taking any to impair his ability to drive.   I cannot say that for the other guy.. I don't know.  Something was sure wrong with the guy to do that in a school zone.  

  I am sure the car is totaled.  IMO, it is because it is not worth the repairs.   The guy starts calling the house.  I put a stop to that in a minute and call the insurance company and tell them they best advise him to quit harrassing or even contacting us.  For what ever reason he is calling, he is upsetting my husband.   They did.   I said if he calls one more time I WILL file charges for harrassment.   Now this guy claims all kinds of damages.   Not physical but to the car.
First thing the guy told my husband was that he had a record for drugs in the past.  Why?  I have no clue why he did that.  I sure as hell wouldn't be telling that but it may explain why he didn't want the cops called and I told the insurance company that I would have called the cops if I had just lost a headlight.   Jack trusts too much and was proud I guess that he, himself remained calm.   This proves that not all vets resort to violence.   They do not!   This is a perfect example of what DaNang and me have been saying about combat vets and the stigma.

I get the rental car, find the airport, and trying to find knobs and gadgets for air/defrost, etc.   I am so glad to get DaNang as he had to find all these little things on our way home from the Airport because we ran into road construction that backed us up for awhile and it starts to turn cooler and windshied fogs so DaNang is good at handling all the button pushing.    What should have been an hour trip has now turned into a 3 hour ride, especially when I take a right in Gainesville instead of a left.

We are finally in Inverness.  DaNang and Jack hug one another but DaNang knows he is needed.  Jack is not feeling well  and  and I told DaNAng on the way from the airport what happened just 24 hours earlier.   DaNang starts getting Jack really acquainted with Mindfulness. ( The therapy used to help veterans and other trauma patients).  That very night.  That very night mind you !!! A vet we helped last year who did live directly across the street whose wife had been in a car wreck and killed..showed up at our home at 4 AM or so.  Shall we say, a bit tipsy.  We had not seen this guy in over 7 months and he just decided to stop in.  ARE YOU Beleiving the timing?   I did not know because I crashed about 12 and was exhausted.  Jack would not let him drive home so he crashed on the couch.   Now I have a person who is not supposed to be here and a meetup to go to.   He helps load his truck and then leaves.  DaNang met him as well.

After the meetup, Charlie comes over and what a pleasant time we all had and DaNang
is really working with Jack as he does with many veterans in his project.   Charlie leaves and DaNang and Jack are very serious about getting some resolve in feeling better.   At 4 AM after the meetup, another vet calls and Jack walks to his residence and talks him down.  The guy is really bad off.   DaNang saw first hand how involved we are with veterans locally.

  I am so tired I am about to collapse but not from the meetup.. From all the drama that went down personally  before, and after the meetup.  I cannot figure out if I have a car, how much I have to pay on deductible, who the insurance company believes or what.
Well... the insurance got the costs to me..2500.00 worth of repairs.   They extend my rental car.  They tell me it might come to each dealing with their own vehicles but I am not happy about that as I may still go file an incident report.   The one thing Jack does not do is lie and would never lie to me.  Bottom line.... It was clearly the big guy's fault.   I do not believe no fault accidents exist.  Both the Iraq vet and the other Vietnam vet are OK and Jack and DaNang were there for not only each other but those two guys as well.

The diaries go up and DaNang has really taught Jack relaxation techniques.  OHC gave him a back massage and JaxDem is holding his hand as you can see from the pics with reassurance, all is well.  We are trying to avoid the wheelchair thing again.

Today I will find out more about the car and the adjusters and all that entails and all I have to say is if I can produce myself in a meetup with all of that hell, there is no excuse for folks not really trying to  meet some of the finest people on earth.   I have yet to totally calm down from the excitement but I know one life is better for Kossacks.

When we took DaNang to the airport, we hugged and hugged.  All three of us.  As Paul Harvey says, " And that is the rest of the story".

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Comment Preferences

  •  Tip Jar (11+ / 0-)

    We the People have to make a difference and the Change.....Just do it ! Be part of helping us build a veteran community online. United Veterans of America

    by Vetwife on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 05:33:45 AM PST

  •  I hope I'm wrong (6+ / 0-)

    but generally if you rear-end someone the insurance company and police assign blame to the person who made the rear impact and call it a failure to maintain an assured clear distance.

    I hope it works out well for you and it certainly does reinforce how great these meet-ups are!

    •  I asked about that too but the insurance (7+ / 0-)

      company told me that was before all the scammers started trying to do what this individual did..Deliberately cause an accident.   There are people who do this for a living..bascially and the insurance companies caught on.
      Or just flat out angry..road rage.   I think the biggest problem is the guy admitting passing and the location being where it is with double yellow lines is a no no.  The claims agent says he has changed his story several times.   Ours is the same.

      We the People have to make a difference and the Change.....Just do it ! Be part of helping us build a veteran community online. United Veterans of America

      by Vetwife on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 06:19:05 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  I am so glad that insurance companies (6+ / 0-)

        are starting to accept that this stuff happens.  I hope everything works out great for you - and I loved the meet-up photos/diary ♥


      •  They did an expose on that on Dateline (3+ / 0-)

        a few years ago - there are groups of people that follow people around and then they try to squeeze them off the road or deliberately cut in front and slam on their brakes.  

        Then they start screaming that they are injured and the person who hit them from behind used to always get cited.  

        Now you have to be alert to EVERYBODY around you - the guy behind, next to and in front of you.  If somebody is trying to pass me I deliberately slow down and if there is somebody behind me they have to slow down or go around.  If they don't, I start tapping my brakes to flash the brake lights.  People get on my rear end and I just slow down to MAKE them go around and try to leave lots of room for when the swerve back over in front of me.  

        Any idiot who starts honking in a school zone at people who are doing the proper speed limit are just plain jerks.

        You have to have eyes in the back of your head these days to keep track of all the crazy drivers, especially here in Florida.  

        Hope Vet is OK - as inconvenient as it all is with the damage to your car - the car is, ultimately, replaceable, if it becomes unrepairable.  Vet is not.  

        ((((Vet & Vetwife))))

        "Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it's only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential." - Barack Obama

        by Ricochet67 on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 12:03:38 PM PST

        [ Parent ]

  •  Thank you for publishing this, Vetwife (6+ / 0-)

    I'm so sorry you all were put through all that, but I'm glad all of you are safe and healthy. Isn't it wonderful that you had the meetup at the end of all that to do the spirit restoration that Kos meetups do!

    -7.75, -8.10; . . . Seneca Falls, Selma and Stonewall (h/t cooper888)

    by Dave in Northridge on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 06:15:13 AM PST

    •  Yes !!!!!! I cannot say enough how (6+ / 0-)

      much those meetups are necessary.  No one goes through just one thing.  We have complained that every community should be like Daily Kos.  They can be if you get to know those in your local area is like taking off blinders or something..... The friends are there if nothing else just to hold your hand and smile but you have to meet them first.  When I was in Ga I was on Kos 3 years and had not met one person.  Fianlly right before we left I met one great Kossack and he was wonderful !!!

      We the People have to make a difference and the Change.....Just do it ! Be part of helping us build a veteran community online. United Veterans of America

      by Vetwife on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 06:23:31 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

  •  ...the rest of the story! Indeed! (4+ / 0-)

    I knew something more was up, but had no idea it was this much.

    Wow.  I hope someone with a good legal background can give some good advice on the accident and how best to move forward.  Maybe Aji? Otteray Scribe is an attorney too.

    Isn't it crazy how the universe works and how well we are looked after?  If you had not had everything in place for the meet up and if it had not been so close to the date when this happened, you wouldn't have had DaNang there when he was needed the most -- in several capacities: finding the knobs in the car, helping Vet with mindfulness techniques, assisting in support for the two vets who "just happened to show up", and just providing a calming presence.  Incredible.  Then there was all the love flowing towards you both from us all - let me say knowing what good people you both are online is one thing, but meeting in person and experiencing the "love light" you both possess is another (not surprising, but something you can't see online) - love and unspoken support from us all just when you most needed it.  Heh.  And some folks don't believe in a higher power.

    I'm not even gonna fuss at you for not telling me the whole story -- This Time!!

    Here's the photo you spoke of in the diary:

    larger image

    Front Row L-R: Vet, Sherry (a local Dem), Caedy.  2nd Row L-R: JaxDem, rnmihayden, orlwriter, FloirdaSNMOM Back Row L-R: Mike (local Dem) DaNang 65, Charlie Grabski, Roxi, Vetwife, Ole Hippie Chick, gulfgal98, Gerry (Roxie's husband)

    Yet again, another good reason for meeting in person.  Hope you promote this in "New Day".

    {{{{{{{{{{{{{{Hugs to you both}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

    As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. John F. Kennedy

    by JaxDem on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 08:08:08 AM PST

    •  Well darling ...especially when folks were (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      JaxDem, worldlotus

      having so much fun.. Jack covers a lot with joking around and me, I kinda am just overwhelmed but smiling......By the way.. He tried without the chair.....Back in it.
      By the way...will be posting a diary about some serious info I got about one of the workers at the VA today .....Doing the background on it now... Serious !!!!!
      IG will be called as soon as I finish.

      We the People have to make a difference and the Change.....Just do it ! Be part of helping us build a veteran community online. United Veterans of America

      by Vetwife on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 08:48:21 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

  •  Thank you, Vetwife and Vet, (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    Vetwife, worldlotus

    for your wonderful hospitality in spite of so many obstacles. It was truly a once in a lifetime experience, one I'll long remember.

    “Perhaps the most 'spiritual' thing any of us can do is simply to look through our own eyes, see with eyes of wholeness, and act with integrity and kindness.” Jon Kabat-Zinn

    by DaNang65 on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 09:36:42 AM PST

  •  holding space (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    worldlotus, Vetwife

    VetWife--it was so wonderful to meet you and Vet, and everyone else. I'm glad, DaNang, that you could work with him on the mindfulness techniques....and now am wishing I'd taken more time to talk to YOU!

    Am holding space and light around you, VetWife, and Vet that things take a turn toward the agents leaning toward justice, knots worked out of the healing process, etc....


  •  you are most welcome my dear friend (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:

    and the Mindfulness is helping so very much.  ( just stop)
    inside thing there folks.
    The art of it  is  so wonderful.
    I spoke online wiht your lady love and I hope the obstacles did not deter she and you for stopping by again.   I really wanted to meet her...
    I cannot express how wonderful it was to have you here for the weekend.  (((( hugs)))) from Jack and me.
    Oh by the far.. they are going 50/50 on fault.
    There are some battles we have to fight.. I don't think this is one of them.  Not at this point.  Car supposed to be done by Friday.

    We the People have to make a difference and the Change.....Just do it ! Be part of helping us build a veteran community online. United Veterans of America

    by Vetwife on Wed Feb 13, 2013 at 11:18:07 AM PST

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