Some friends and I were conversing about Ted Nugent yesterday and how loathsome he is, and one of them, a Wisconsinite, suggested he be invited to their Capitol instead -- after all, he could bring his guns! Someone else pointed out that if he went there, he might be banned from singing.
Which led another friend to posit the immortal question in the headline, and two more to suggest and create the image above. And, well, I can't resist a challenge. Lyrics below the orange squiggle.
How do you solve a problem like Ted Nugent?
How do you get a gun nut to calm down?
How do you find a word that means Ted Nugent?
A has-been guitarist, a dumb whackaloon, a clown?
He doesn't smoke and doesn't drink and always goes to Mass
He likes to shoot a gun or bow and tidies up his brass
His comments on world politics can come across as crass
Ted Nugent's not an asset to the nation!
He loves all of the animals, especially when they're dead
He talks about the president in manner quite ill-bred
I wish that he would just shut up and play guitar instead
And stay away from prominent orations!
I'd like to say a word in his behalf
Ted Nugent... makes me laugh.
Oh, how do you solve a problem like Ted Nugent?
Whatever happened to the rock'n'roll?
All of the folks who used to like Ted Nugent
Say that the GOP has bought his soul!