From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Happy Presidents' Day!
Woo hoo! I've got my Millard Fillmore tree set up, Andy Williams' classic It's the Most Executive Branchful Time of the Year is playing on the Victrola, and all my coupons are clipped for BIG Pre$ident$' Day $ale-a-bration $aving$ on cars, mattresses, boats, appliances, furniture, cat food, heating oil, drapes, scented candles, toys, haircuts, carpeting and lingerie. I may even bake a few dozen Whig cookies today.
To commemorate the holiday properly (besides shopping), I found a few lovely things that have been said about America's "Deciders" through the years in Joseph Cummins' fun book, Anything for a Vote and Rating the Presidents by William Ridings, Jr. and Stuart McIver. Feel the love:
"If ever a nation was debauched by a man, the American nation has been debauched by Washington. If ever a nation was deceived by a man, the American nation has been deceived by Washington." (The Philadelphia Aurora)
"A hideous hermaphroditical character who has neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman." (James Callender, hired by Thomas Jefferson to smear John Adams)
Every American MUST own a plate with the
presidents' faces on it. It's the LAW!
"Jefferson is a mean-spirited, low-lived fellow, the son of a half-breed Indian squaw, sired by a Virginia Mulatto father." (Federalist pamphlet)
"A base wretch...who is for WAR!" (DeWitt Clinton supporters on James Madison)
"Martin Van Buren is laced up in corsets, such as women in town wear, and if possible tighter than the best of them. It would be difficult to say from his personal appearance, whether he was a man or a woman, but for his large red and gray whiskers." (Davy Crockett)
"Miss Nancy" (Andrew Jackson on James Buchanan)
"He is a horrid-looking wretch. Sooty and scoundrelly in aspect, a cross between the nutmeg dealer, the horse-swapper, and the nightman." (The Charleston Mercury on Abraham Lincoln)
"Tweedledum and Tweedledee" (Woodrow Wilson on Teddy Roosevelt and William Howard Taft)
"A fathead with the brains of a guinea pig" (Teddy Roosevelt on William Howard Taft)
"If you vote for Nixon, you might go to hell." (Harry Truman)
"These guys are the most crooked, you know, lying group of people I've ever seen." (John Kerry on the '04 Bush campaign)
“I love being home in this place where Ann and I were raised, where both of us were born. Ann was born in Henry Ford Hospital, I was born in Harper Hospital. No one has ever asked to see my birth certificate. They know that this is the place that we were born and raised.” (Mitt Romney, going full birther on Obama. Romney lost in a landslide.)
Oh, and you might be interested to know that I caught Fox News with their pants down and won the War on Presidents' Day in a single skirmish. Happy Holiday! (And sorry for that visual.)
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Note: Due to the Presidents' Day holiday, C&J will appear as scheduled. We regret the inconvenience.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til St. Patrick's Day: 27
Days 'til the Zilker Kite Festival in Austin: 13
Percent of U.S. adults who believe climate change is a very or somewhat serious threat: 84%
(Source: Duke University survey)
Number of Hindus who will go to Allahabad to bathe in the Ganges before Kumbh Mela ends next month: 80 million
Number of substations in the temporary electrical grid India has set up to accommodate the influx of people: 53
(Source: Time)
Number of presidents who worked as a janitor: 2 (Garfield, Lyndon Johnson)
Number of presidents who worked for the U.S. Postal Service: 2 (McKinley, Lincoln)
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NEW! California Dreamin'
Brought to you by the 2013 Netroots Nation Convention in San Jose, June 20-23. The progressive netroots has a vibrant quilting community, and this looks like a must-see place:
Now showing: Folk Indian Textiles from
the Collection of Carol Summers
The mission of the San Jose Museum of Quilts & Textiles is to promote the art, craft, and history of quilts and textiles. The Museum advocates on behalf of quilts and textiles as a distinctly accessible and unifying visual, sculptural, and kinetic art form pioneered and practiced by people worldwide for thousands of years to create objects of beauty, use, and meaning.
We celebrate quilts and textiles as forms of artistic and cultural expression that are at the core of human experience and that can be created, appreciated and enjoyed by all people.
We hear they're very intertwined with the community.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Oh, take your pick…
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CHEERS to exceeding expectations. Let's remember that it's still the middle of friggin' winter. That alone makes it doubly impressive to read this the day after:
40,000 rallied in D.C. yesterday
to halt the Keystone XL Pipeline.
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What a day! Over 40,000 people poured into the streets of Washington, DC today to push President Obama to take our nation “Forward on Climate” and say no to the Keystone XL pipeline. Our team here at 350.org had expected a crowd, but this was MASSIVE. Volunteers from around the country organized 130 buses to get people to the rally and it showed: there were people of all ages from Florida to Wisconsin to California here today.
The march today looked like the movement that elected President Obama. Now, it’s time for him to join us in standing up to Big Oil and saying no to Keystone XL. Because this movement isn’t going anywhere. We’re, to borrow a phrase, fired up and ready to go.
Sharing in the larger-than-expected rally's success are the Kossacks who put together last week's
Forward on Climate blogathon, which raised awareness and no doubt helped contribute to the crowd size. Supporters of the Keystone pipeline, naturally, are 100 percent sure that it's "perfectly safe." These are the same people who, when a "perfectly safe" pipeline bursts (like in Michigan recently) or a "perfectly safe" well explodes (BP's Deepwater Horizon rig), shrug and say, "Oh well. Accidents will happen. Nothing's perfectly safe." Yeah…we know. Obama: don’t lay the dang pipe.
CHEERS to burritos, beans and banter. Saturday afternoon upwards of 30 Kossacks gathered at Margarita's Mexican Restaurant in Portsmouth, New Hampshire to, as we do from time to time, string words together and wash some drink down with food. This particular one was also a gathering to toast the memory of Commonmass's beloved GreenMountainBoy02. In addition to Commonmass and his mom Judy, our New England meetup included 4Freedom, ParsonsBeach & Jim, Eddie in ME & State Senator Colleen Lachowicz (aka the now-legendary World of Warcraft candidate), DvCM, BJ Edward, Fennster, Mayim, DtheO, nhox42 (thanks for stepping in to manage the event), theKgirls, bjedward, Debbie in ME, Grammyk, Radical Simplicity, Nauticalknots & Mrs. Nauticalknots, LoreleiHI, Simple, The Marti, Leolabeth, Vacationland, Common Sense Mainer, and BiPM. Thanks to everyone who joined us, especially all the new folks. The next meetup is March 9 in eastern Connecticut (details via Clytemnestra). Or as we here in Maine call it: the deep south.
JEERS to the Apostrolypse. To help solve the mystery of how, exactly, one spells today's holiday, I consulted the ads appearing in The Portland (Maine) Press Herald:
Macy's: Presidents' Day
America's Mattress: President's Day
Agren Appliance: President's Day
Berlin City Auto Group: Presidents' Day
Quirk Chevrolet: Presidents Week
State Street Discount: President's Day
The reason for the season.
Selby Shoes: President's Day
Cabot House: Presidents Day
Sears: Presidents' Day
Weirs Motors: Presidents Week
Sleepy's Mattress: Presidents' Day
Big Lots: President's Day
Sports Authority: Presidents' Day
Dell: President's Day
Bill Dodge: President's Celebration
Lee Auto Mall: Presidents' Day
DirectTV: President's Day
Kohl's: Presidents' Day (last year it was President's Day)
Prime Nissan: Presidents Day & President's Month
America's Mattress & Furniture: President's Day
Vic's Appliance: President's Day
Charlie's Car Dealerships: President's Sale
We trust this clears up any confusion.
CHEERS to great discoveries. On this date in 1930, astronomer Clyde Tombaugh discovered a new "planet" in our solar system. He called it Pluto. Republicans called it Home.
JEERS to borderline psychosis. If you're just tuning in to the immigration-reform discussion, here's the way it's worked out so far:
1. Republicans hold a position on immigration that the public hates, which is contributing to the death of their party.
2. To gain more public support, Republicans move slightly to the center on immigration.
3. After being notified of this shift, President Obama greets the news favorably.
4. Because President Obama greets the news favorably, Republicans run back to their original position on immigration because Obama must fail. They blame Obama for forcing them to make him fail.
5. The public goes back to hating the Republican position on immigration, which continues contributing to the death of their party.
If you read the above while sucking on laughing gas it makes sense.
CHEERS to stalling for freedom (or something). 172 years ago, on February 18, 1841, the first continuous filibuster in the U.S. Senate began. But it's not the longest continuous filibuster that's ever happened. That honor, of course, goes to the four-years-and-counting filibuster of the Obama presidency. And in other news, Harry Reid is still on my shit list.
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Five years ago in C&J: February 18, 2008
JEERS to creepy coincidences (via Atrios). It figures:
The online gun dealer who sold a weapon to the Virginia Tech shooter said it was an unnerving coincidence that he also sold handgun accessories to the man who killed five students at Northern Illinois University.
Eric Thompson said his Web site ... sold two empty 9 mm Glock magazines and a Glock holster to Steven Kazmierczak on Feb. 4, just 10 days before the 27-year-old opened fire in a classroom and killed five before committing suicide. Another Web site run by [Eric] Thompson's company ... also sold a Walther .22-caliber handgun to Seung-Hui Cho, who killed 32 people in April on the Virginia Tech campus before killing himself.
Eric, I believe that would be your cue to become a bitter, broken recluse. Don’t forget to not bathe or it doesn’t count. And, no, you can't trim your fingernails either.
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And just one more…
JEERS to weekend wankers. A little retro-hilarity here. Here's a David Brooks moment I found from a quintet of years back that rivals his famous Applebee's salad bar remark. This is from his appearance on The Chris Matthews Show:
Imposter Obama speaking to
fake workers at fake factory?
Responding to Chris Matthews' question, "[W]ill Barack Obama's oratorical ability on the lectern in front of big rooms continue to be his winning edge?" The New York Times' David Brooks said: "Yes, but he's got to get away from colleges. Go visit a factory for once." In fact, Obama delivered what his campaign called a "major economic policy address" at a Wisconsin General Motors factory a few days before Brooks made his comment.
It's just a little reminder of why you should always pick your pundits carefully. My rule: Best stick to the ones who don’t make shit up.
Have a nice Monday. Oh, and due to the holiday there will be no meteors raining down from the sky today. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
"So let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is getting stuck in an elevator with Bill in Portland. I mean, amiright, people? Amiright???"
---FDR, a president
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