From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Inside the Minds of the Dangerous Orange Rabble
Where does the time go? It's the end of the first quarter of 2013, and that means it's C&J number-crunching time. Every few months we post the results of some past C&J polls (no relation to polls commissioned by Kos) to give you a snapshot of how the wheel in the Kossack headbone turns. The total number of votes each poll received is in parentheses so you'll know it's not just me and the cat voting:
• 36 percent of the Daily Kos community gave President Obama an overall grade of "A" for his first term. 48 percent gave him a "B." 1 percent gave him an "F." (10,205)
• 80 percent believe the Republican party will remain "as radical, unreasonable, out-of-step and unhinged" during Obama's second term as it was during his first. (8,677)
• 46 percent thought significant filibuster reform would happen last January. 47 percent didn't. (4,387)
Simba votes in every
C&J poll without fail.
• 60 percent of you consider yourselves a good or excellent cook. (3,481)
• 92 percent of you really really really want Michele Bachmann to be Senator Al Franken's challenger next year. (6,022)
• 60 percent of you do not favor the new TSA rules that will allow small knives and other pointy bric-a-brac on passenger planes. (4,280)
• 80 percent considered President Obama's trip to Israel, the West Bank and Jordan a success. (3,736)
• 32 percent thought the proper size of the trillion-dollar coin should be that of a drink coaster, versus 27 percent who thought it should be moon-size and 17 percent who said it should be the size of a pizza. (3,794)
• 88 percent wanted Barney Frank to be the temporary replacement for John Kerry's Senate seat until the special election in June. (6,479)
• 38 percent approved construction of a galactic Death Star, but only if it's used for humanitarian purposes. (3.224)
I think the overarching conclusion is obvious: when I grow up I want to be just like you.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Note: To access C&J on your smartphone, simply wave it over this code:
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If it doesn’t load within five years, call tech support and give 'em an earful because that's just ridiculous.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til the National Spelling Bee: 56
Days 'til the Lewes Tulip Festival in Delaware: 9
Chance that a man will develop cancer during his lifetime: 1-in-2
Chance that a woman will develop cancer during her lifetime: 1-in-3
(Source: Time)
Percent of adults surveyed who say they text and drive, even though 98% of all adults know that texting and driving is something only a moron would do: 49%
(Source: AT&T poll via The Washington Post)
Barack Obama's shoe size: 13½
(Source: CNN)
And late-breaking news from New York:
Boston Red Sox 8 New York Yankees 2
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Tuesday Words of Wisdom from the Right-wing Blogosphere:
barry’s approval rate in Israel is 10%. The Israeli Jew is a Jew first. The American liberal Jew is a liberal first. His/her Jewishness is just an excuse to take extra days off and other gubmint benies.
---Commenter frontguy at the Michelle Malkin blog
All together now: 1…2…3…
Classy!
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Riding off into the sunset together….
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These flurrs is fer ye.
CHEERS to April!!! Wikipedia tells me that "The traditional etymology is from the verb aperire, 'to open,' in allusion to its being the season when trees and flowers begin to 'open,' ... The birthstone of April is the diamond, and the birth flower is typically listed as either the Daisy (Bellis perennis) or the Sweet Pea. Zodiac signs for the month are Aries (until April 19) and Taurus (April 20 onwards)."
Those who call it the cruelest month have never spent a March in Maine. Besides, baseball season is here (Go Sox of the reddish variety!!!), the Masters golf tournament starts next week, the flowers are starting to go "Poink!", plus there's Earth Day, Patriots Day (when Tom Brady dresses up as George Washington and throws a touchdown on Lexington Green), Arbor Day, National 8-Track Tape Day, Administrative Professionals Day, a lunar eclipse on the 25th and the 29th is Shrimp Scampi Day.
Then again, taxes are due in a couple weeks. Okay, fine: cruel it is.
CHEERS to hot bids on a warm quilt. The OkIciyap ("We help") auction sponsored by the talented artisans at the Daily Kos Quilt Guild continues this week. Here's a gander at the one-of-a-kind work of art up for bids:
The auction benefits the Food Pantry of the Isabel Community---made up of members of the Lakota Sioux Tribe---in the Cheyenne River Reservation in north central South Dakota. Auction bidding rules
are here. I believe the top bid now is around $1,000 (about one-thousandth of what the quilt is worth). Or you can make a direct donation to the food pantry---large or small, it all helps a
lot---via
credit card or your friendly U.S. Postal Service. Keep in mind that it also makes an excellent cape, parachute and pocketsquare. Assuming your pocket is ginormous.
JEERS to mea culpas delivered too tardy culpa. The Japanese power company---I believe its name is TEPCOTHROUGHTHETULIPSCO---issued a long overdue statement about the March, 2011 Fukushima Daichi nuclear plant disaster: "Whoops. Our bad." See? That wasn't so hard. Meanwhile the plant's woes continued last month when it suffered a power outage caused by an electrocuted rat. Chalk that up as one more reason I'm against capital punishment.
CHEERS to Charles Hall. He patented aluminum 124 years ago today. And made the world safe for paranoids everywhere. Remember, cellar dwellers: Shiny side out!
JEERS to the old bait 'n switch routine. Few years back Maine had (yet another) referendum vote on a casino in Maine. The "yes" side slathered their campaign in Maine-centric promises: Maine jobs! Maine revenue! Maine owners! And they squeaked out a win by a few thousand votes. They turned operation of the Oxford Casino to a Las Vegas company, which I suppose made some sense. But then over the weekend we learned that, just ten months after it opened, the Maine owners have flipped it and sold the whole kit 'n caboodle to Churchill Downs for a cool $160 million in---you guessed it---cash:
A lovely little sinkhole in
which to lose your money.
Dennis Bailey, whose public relations firm in Portland led the campaign against the casino in Oxford in 2010, called the sale to an out-of-state operator "another broken promise." "They were saying it would be locally owned and operated," Bailey said, "but people who own and operate casinos are casino operators---not local businesspeople. They said there was going to be a hotel and a golf course and beautiful grounds. None of that happened."
So, instead of the promised Maine-centric "Resort and Casino," we get a Vegas/Kentucky casino with no resort. Oh, and a parking lot. Lovely parking lot. If you're into asphalt.
CHEERS to meeting America's eggspectations. Yesterday the White House took on the look of an old-fashioned "people's house" picture postcard, with commoners strolling the grounds with baby buggies and parasols as President and Mrs. Obama hosted the annual Easter Egg Roll. Despite the president's basketball skills abandoning him on the court, a good time was had by all:
Obama reads to GOP House members.
C & J congratulates the 7 year-old kid who found the coveted "golden egg" and won the grand prize: her very own sequester-shuttered airport control tower.
CHEERS to mo' money. On April 2, 1792, Congress authorized the establishment of a U.S. Mint. The resolution was described as "curiously strong."
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Five years ago in C&J: April 2, 2008
JEERS to killing me softly with his song (and dance). Last week John McCain announced his mavericky health care plan. Gosh, Beav', it sounded swell! If by swell you mean heartless and shallow. Over to you, Liz:
Sooooo miss her.
Elizabeth Edwards said this weekend that she and Sen. John McCain (R-AZ), who have both been treated for cancer, have one thing in common: "Neither one of us would be covered by his health policy." Under McCain’s plan, insurance companies "wouldn’t have to cover preexisting conditions like melanoma and breast cancer," she said, since cancer survivors are routinely denied insurance when they try to purchase it as individuals.
So let's summarize his 'new direction for America': 1) War in Iraq: 100 more years. 2) Economic crisis: Call a meeting. 3) Health care: Become a doctor. Can't wait to hear what he has in store for global warming. Make more ice cubes?
JEERS to ruining America's pastime. President Bush got booed Sunday as he threw out the first pitch at a Washington Nationals baseball game. Big deal. These days he gets booed at cabinet meetings.
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And just one more…
Lordy Lordy! Look who's 39
for the second year in a row!
CHEERS to Rachel Maddow---TV host, razor-sharp political analyst, hypocrisy slayer, Rhodes Scholar and...Birthday Chick! MSNBC's brightest bulb turned the BIG 4-0 yesterday. (Sheesh---I'm old enough to be her father, assuming I sired a child at 8.) Every night, piece by piece and brick by brick, she dismantles the GOP monolith with such grace and dexterity that her conservative guests usually end up thanking her for the gutting. She tolerates no BS---and that's why we love her.
But if her media career ever fizzles, she can always fall back on her expertise as a mixologist (with an able assist by Lewis Black). Cheers, Rachel, and---everybody say it with me---many blessings on your camels.
Have a nice Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Justin Bieber had to leave Bill in Portland Maine in quarantine after landing in Germany last week without the necessary papers, an official said Saturday.
---Fox News
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