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Last night, Jon Stewart looked at how happy Fox News is with the recent news about Benghazi, the IRS, and the DOJ.  And while they had a point, Jon called out a few of those who were suddenly piping up to talk about the scandals.

DONALD RUMSFELD (5/14/2013): I can't imagine how a person could stand up there, when everyone involved knew it was a terrorist attack. ... The idea that it was somehow related to a YouTube video and that that narrative kept being promoted, I suppose, it's because it fit their hopes and what they wanted to be the case.
....

You believe the Obama administration's promoting a narrative?  Not because it's real, but because it fits their hopes and what they want to be the case?  You?  Señor W.M.D. McGillicutty, Esq.?  The guy who wanted to go after Saddam Hussein on 9/11 while the President was still reading "My Pet Goat"?  You??

And somehow managed to make that attack happen, even though Saddam Hussein had nothing to do with 9/11?  "Rumsfeld" is German for promoting a narrative because it fits your hopes and what you want to be the case!  (audience laughter and applause)  It is the rare German word that is actually shorter than the thing it is describing.

....

DICK CHENEY (5/13/2013): I think it's one of the worst incidents that's frankly, that I can recall in my career. ... They claimed it was because of a demonstration video, so they wouldn't have to admit it was really all about their incompetence. ... They lied.
(mixed audience disgust and laughter)

You do not get to use the "L" word.  In fact, you don't even get to watch The L Word.  Dick.  Which I can call you, because that's your name.

After the lies you told, you don't get to doubt anyone's credibility.  If a baseball breaks your window, and your grandkid walks through the door with a baseball bat, and tells you that Zack and Cody from The Suite Life did it, while they were playing a game with SpongeBob, you just have to fucking choke that down!  (wild audience cheering and applause)

Now listen to me!  And listen close!  All of these scandals could add up to very bad repercussions for the Obama administration.  And many conservatives and Republicans are entitled to their moment of righteous schadenfreude.  But guess what?  History didn't start Friday.  And Obama administration transgressions don't wipe away yours, which are many und grievous.

So, enjoy watching your friends have their fun, but Tweedledick and Tweedlerum don't get to join the party.  (audience laughter and cheering)

Video and full transcript below the fold.

So this is all bad for the administration.  The question is, how bad?
LOU DOBBS (5/13/2013): This is Nixonian.  This is a President whose inner Nixon is being revealed.
See?  That!  But!  Unh!!  If these measures from the IRS and Justice were taken at the behest of the White House, that is Nixonian.  At best, if you believe the administration only found out about this stuff through news reports, it's still bad.  It's just that the President's inner Magoo is being revealed.  It's Magoovian.  I remember when President Magoo nominated a coat rack for Secretary of the Treasury.

Ha!  It was comical, until of course, the devastating Depression.

But this week, I can't nitpick.  The floodgates are open.  Every critic suddenly has credibility.  Every single one.  Who wouldn't have the standing to be able to legitimately criticize this President?  I can't imagine!

DONALD RUMSFELD (5/14/2013): I can't imagine....
HOLD ON!!!  (wild audience cheering and applause)

Aren't you Donald Rumsfeld?  I assume you're about to say something like, "I can't imagine possibly commenting on something like this, given my dubious relationship with good governance."

DONALD RUMSFELD (5/14/2013): I can't imagine how a person could stand up there, when everyone involved knew it was a terrorist attack. ... The idea that it was somehow related to a YouTube video and that that narrative kept being promoted, I suppose, it's because it fit their hopes and what they wanted to be the case.

(Jon mouths "Thank you Jesus")

Thank you, Donald Rumsfeld.  Here I was, thinking there was no way to overreach.  (Jon mouths "And you pulled me back in!")

You believe the Obama administration's promoting a narrative?  Not because it's real, but because it fits their hopes and what they want to be the case?  You?  Señor W.M.D. McGillicutty, Esq.?  The guy who wanted to go after Saddam Hussein on 9/11 while the President was still reading "My Pet Goat"?  You??

And somehow managed to make that attack happen, even though Saddam Hussein had nothing to do with 9/11?  "Rumsfeld" is German for promoting a narrative because it fits your hopes and what you want to be the case!  (audience laughter and applause)  It is the rare German word that is actually shorter than the thing it is describing.

So no!  You alone don't get to come to the victory parade for the Republicans.  You're the only guy who doesn't get to weigh in.

DICK CHENEY'S VOICE: I think it's one of the worst incidents that's frankly....
Did I say one guy?  Is that He Whose Name I Dare Not Speak?  The one who sets off my Cheney-dar?  Who let our country astray-dar?  Shot his friend in the fay-dar?  Has a heart of gray-dar?

Don't.  You.  Dare.

DICK CHENEY (5/13/2013): I think it's one of the worst incidents that's frankly, that I can recall in my career. ... They claimed it was because of a demonstration video, so they wouldn't have to admit it was really all about their incompetence. ... They lied.
(mixed audience disgust and laughter)

You do not get to use the "L" word.  In fact, you don't even get to watch The L Word.  Dick.  Which I can call you, because that's your name.

After the lies you told, you don't get to doubt anyone's credibility.  If a baseball breaks your window, and your grandkid walks through the door with a baseball bat, and tells you that Zack and Cody from The Suite Life did it, while they were playing a game with SpongeBob, you just have to fucking choke that down!  (wild audience cheering and applause)

Now listen to me!  And listen close!  All of these scandals could add up to very bad repercussions for the Obama administration.  And many conservatives and Republicans are entitled to their moment of righteous schadenfreude.  But guess what?  History didn't start Friday.  And Obama administration transgressions don't wipe away yours, which are many und grievous.

So, enjoy watching your friends have their fun, but Tweedledick and Tweedlerum don't get to join the party.  (audience laughter and cheering)

It's like this.  That's Mike Tyson.  (picture of Mike Tyson)  He doesn't get to make fun of someone's tattoo.  We'll be right back.

Meanwhile, Stephen talked about the UN telling third world countries to eat bugs for sources of protein.  He then had another Better Know a District series, this time with Rep. Gwen Moore (D-WI), who got two segments.
Stephen talked with musician Cyndi Lauper, while Jon talked with former Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-ME), who also got two segments.

Originally posted to BruinKid on Thu May 16, 2013 at 05:00 AM PDT.

Also republished by Electronic America: Progressives Film, music & Arts Group.

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