July 13, 2013, a day that will live in infamy. It was four days after Wendy Davis, my personal hero, filibustered SB-5, the draconian bill which restricted Texas abortions virtually out of existence. Rick "The Human Tupee" Perry immediately called another special session to complete the vote he failed to get the Thursday before.
A whole crapload of pissed off Texans showed up to demonstrate anew with cries of Shame! and posters reading, "Jesus Isn't a Dick so Keep Him Out of my Vagina."
It was really a standard day of protest in the war against women, until something -- strange -- happened.
They started confiscating tampons and sanitary napkins. They waved the licensed gun owners in no problem, letting them in through a special lines. But if you had a tampon in your possession, it was seized. Women were confused and understandably upset by these bizarre proceedings.
Then came the explanation. From a Department of Public Safety press release:
...for safety purposes, DPS recommended to the Texas Senate that all bags be inspected prior to allowing individuals to enter the Senate gallery, which the Texas Senate authorized.18 jars!!! That's a lot of crap! That's two less than twenty craps! The right wing forced birther folks went nuts. Imagine the scene: urine, poop, glitter, tampons and feminine napkins flung mercilessly onto the hapless legislators, who were only trying to save the unborn babies from the barbaric, baby killing, feces flinging women of Texas.
During these inspections, DPS officers have thus far discovered one jar suspected to contain urine, 18 jars suspected to contain feces, and three bottles suspected to contain paint.
Lt. Governor David Dewhurst, niece-in-law protector extraordinaire, even swore that he had personally seen bottles of urine and bags of feces at a DPS screening station.
Well, guess what, boys and girls? People were immediately suspicious of this ludicrous story and began asking for proof, the very next day after the bill was passed despite the best efforts of progressive legislators like Davis and Kirk Watson, my representative. Dewhurst was forced to backtrack, admitting later that he had not seen them personally, but he had been told. Honest!
There was no official report of feces-filled jars filed, and when director of the DPS Steve McCraw asked for photographic evidence—ostensibly to prove that officers weren't just telling fish tales to make pro-choicers look bad—he was told that the women who were supposedly carrying the poop were simply "directed to throw away prohibited items before entering the gallery."The evidence was thrown right in the trash. The DPS apparently didn't feel it was necessary to keep the evidence, they just directed the evil feces flinging feminists to throw the incriminating evidence in the trash barrels.
Way to go, DPS. You humiliated women by forcing them to throw sanitary products which they probably needed, into the trash in front of all their friends and peers. You embarrassed the state of Texas by making a laughingstock of the political process. You passed some of the worst, most restrictive abortion laws in the whole country, removing the possibility of a safe and legal medical procedure for the vast majority of Texas women. Okay, that one wasn't DPS's fault, but it's all wrapped up in one big, crap-on-women package tied up in a right wing bow.
This story sucks on so many levels.
The Right Wing War Against Women continues...stay tuned.