For the past three months I feel as if I’ve been living in a real-life episode of Green Acres. I have been bombarded daily by Ted Cruz the Junior Senator from Texas and his campaign to end Obamacare or The World as we know it, whichever comes first. Prior to Congress and the President reaching an agreement to stave off mass suicide the presence of Mr. Cruz has been persistent. Numerous commercials feature him speaking about defunding or delaying Obamacare and asking the citizenry to help him in his quest. Oh and don’t forget to contribute.
As I watched Mr. Cruz I finally realized that I was listening to Mr. Eustace Charleston Haney or Mr. Haney the local farmer turned salesman and con man on Green Acres. If there ever were a modern day version of the TV Series snake oil salesman it is Mr. Cruz. His constant blather about defunding Obamacare and threatening to shut the government down in order to achieve his doomed policy objective and strategy iseminiscent of Mr. Haney and his antics on Green Acres.
On Green Acres Mr. Haney was able to sell his family’s ancient and dilapidated farm to Oliver Douglas and his wife Lisa. Oliver Douglas wanted so desperately to leave the big city life of New York City and become a farmer that he became easy prey for Mr. Haney’s shenanigans throughout the series. Like Mr. Haney, Mr. Cruz was successful in selling his idea of shutting down the U.S. Government in order to defund or delay Obamacare to many of the Republican Members of the U.S. House of Representatives because they are so desperate for a Barack Obama failure. In addition to selling the House Republicans, Mr. Cruz has been able to convince approximately 2 million Americans desperate for an Obama failure to believe in him and his brand of politics.
On Green Acres Mr. Haney operated in rural Hooterville. Ironically Mr. Cruz operates in the rural minds of America’s modern day Hootervilles. After Mr. Cruz’s classic failure to shut down the government, he went home to Houston to a hero’s welcome. Why? Well just like Mr. Haney, Mr. Cruz knows how to sell in order to get attention, applauds, and most importantly, get people to part with their money. One infamous statement that Mr. Cruz made during his welcome home speech was;
“Having spent the past month up in D.C. it is terrific to be back in America”.
That is a really strange statement for him to make. I recall each time I traveled to Texas the flight attendants would always alert passengers to set their watches to reverse because clocks spin backward when traveling to Texas and depending on how far you travel into Texas, you could end up in the 1950’s.
Mr. Douglas bought Haney’s cow, tractor, and plow, all of which were as useless as the farm. Just like the policy ideas and legislation of Senator Cruz. Mr. Cruz like a long line of political pimps preceding him didn’t take long to figure out how Washington works. Find a problem, any problem and scream about it from the top of your lungs. Curse the dark but never shine a light. At least Mr. Haney would often turn up in his truck at the Douglas farm minutes after they realized they needed something and he would sell them exactly what they needed even if it were very odd.
Just like Mr. Haney who seemed to come around every time Oliver experienced a problem on the farm with his peddler’s truck full of worthless junk, Mr. Cruz seems to be available to the media to demonize and castigate anything associated with President Obama good or bad. When there is a problem look for Senator Cruz to lead the “End-Times Squad”. Like Mr. Haney who was able to unload outlandishly named items on Mr. Douglas at inflated prices despite his past shady dealings with them, Mr. Cruz having no legislative successes continues to succeed in unloading his brand of politics on a gullible constituency.
Mr. Haney succeeded at cheating Oliver and Lisa Douglas by charging them several times over what the property was worth and saddling them with a dysfunctional farm, Mr. Cruz and his political behavior focused an Obama failure is contributing to a dysfunctional U.S. government. However, we must give Mr. Cruz credit for his ability to convince a segment of our citizenry that his form of junk politics has some use that it clearly does not, and that it’s in some way valuable.
For those who are too young or who have never watched Green Acres here are a few clips with the Mr. Haney character for you.
Mr. Haney’s Phone Company:
Mr. Haney’s Airplane Service:
References: Wikipedia; YouTube