From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
"HealthCareGov Girl"
With apologies to anyone connected to the song Mona Lisa.
HealthCareGov girl, HealthCareGov girl's what I've named you
You're the face I'd see when I clicked on that site
But the system had some glitches, HealthCareGov girl
So they yanked you off and put you out of sight.
Bon voyage, healthcare.gov girl
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Did you smile to increase traffic, HealthCareGov girl?
Or was this your way to hide the broken parts?
Many geeks have been rushed to your servers
They de-code there, and re-code there
As they work out the quirks, HealthCareGov girl
ACA becomes more easy, fast and smart.
Do you smile because you're covered, HealthCareGov girl?
By Obamacare and all its health care perks?
Pre-existing conditions are gone now
Lifetime caps can't leave you broke now
Fare thee well, it's been swell, HealthCareGov girl
We'll rock and roll when healthcare-dot-gov works
HealthCareGov girl, HealthcCareGov girl.
And even bigger apologies to everyone else.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Note: Today's C&J was written with 100% recycled pixels. Unfortunately they're the old kind that squirt mercury, so we recommend you read today's column from at least 50 feet away with safety goggles. ---Mgt
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4 days!!!
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By the Numbers:
Weeks 'til election day:
1
Days 'til the
Peter Anderson Festival in Ocean Springs, Mississippi:
4
Average increase in health insurance premiums during the Bush administration and last year under Obama, respectively:
13.2%, 4%
(Source: Kaiser Family Foundation)
Number of applicants to U.S. medical schools in 2013, a record:
48,014
Year of the previous record-high application rate:
1996
(Source:
AAMC)
Percent of public school teachers who say they spent their own money on school supplies during the past year:
99.5%
Average amount they spent:
$485
(Source: Harper's Index)
World Series
Boston leads St. Louis 3 games to 2
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Tuesday Words of Wisdom from the Right-wing Blogosphere:
The designated speaker of the house noted earlier in the year that the House probably would not be bringing forth any immigration legislation this year. Now he is talking about immigration legislation by the end of the year. If so we can count on it being a piece of crap that gives Obama most if not all of what he wants. Dingy Harry will play his usual "We will not negotiate" tune which will bring McConnell and Cornyn around to the democrat line of thinking.
--Commenter Wtop at RedState
All together now: 1…2…3…
Whoop!
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Two will do.
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A judge confirms: TX Sen.
Wendy Davis was right to
filibuster the abortion bill.
CHEERS to the judge of "No!" Feel free to revel in the frustration of all the privileged Republican white men who are scowling this morning, thanks to a federal judge's decision that deems part of the anti-abortion laws passed over the summer in the Texas Legislature
unconstitutional. The privileged Republican white men---who would approve the most liberal abortion laws possible if they were themselves able to get pregnant---will use the appeals process to kick the can down the road and onto the Supreme Court's bench, but for now it's a relief to the many clinics that would have, as of today, otherwise been forced to close. Oh, and one quick parting shot to Governor Rick Perry, who apparently does
not have God on his side (again): the judge was appointed by George W. Bush. Ouch.
CHEERS and JEERS to the ups and downs of disarmament. This is a bit the opposite of what I'd expect: the Syrian government met its deadline for declaring the specifics of its chemical weapons stockpiles. But the weapons inspectors themselves missed their deadline for inspecting all 23 weapons sites. Doesn't sound like a catastrophe, though:
Nasty business.
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[I]nspectors have visited only 21 because of security issues. While there are no consequences for missing the deadline, the group's failure to meet it underscores the ambitious timeline as well as the risks its inspectors face in carrying out their mission in the middle of Syria's civil war. […]
The chemical weapons watchdog said it has not given up hope of gaining access to the two locations. "Negotiations continue to try to get security guarantees so our inspectors can go in," OPCW spokesman Michael Luhan said.
Meanwhile back here in the U.S., inspectors have given up trying to find stockpiles of Republican common sense in the House and plan to padlock the doors by noon and then hit the martini bar.
CHEERS to the most trusted name in news (well, besides Cronkite and Maddow). On October 29, 1911, Joseph Pulitzer died at 64 aboard his yacht in Charleston, South Carolina, thus ending the life of the "yellow journalism" publisher who was dedicated to looking out for the little guy (if loudly and sensationalistically):
The "Pooplitzer" prize
Previously the press usually spoke for the establishment and moneyed interests, but this new strain of journalism supported labor, attacked trusts and monopolies, and exposed scandal, fraud and corruption, both public and private.
At a time when journalism was not considered a respectable way of earning a living, Pulitzer was committed to raising the standards of the profession.
Today the best and the brightest in journalism are celebrated with the coveted "Pulitzer," which comes in a lovely velvet display case. And when I depart this earth I hope to leave behind a foundation that will recognize the most dimwitted and dishonest. I'm calling it the "Pooplitzer," and it'll come in a lovely doggie-doo bag. (Fox will need an extra-large display case to hold 'em all.)
JEERS to today's not-so-boring correction. The immigration bill that Senator Marco Rubio helped conceive, craft, champion and ultimately vote for has now become the immigration bill that Senator Marco Rubio regrets conceiving, rues crafting, denies championing and would now vote against. Please make a note of it. And always snicker responsibly when watching a hapless politician's presidential aspirations circle the drain.
CHEERS to the fed-up female. On October 29, 1966, the National Organization for Women (NOW) was formed to help reduce the extent to which men act like pigs:
Happy anniversary!
NOW is the largest, most comprehensive feminist advocacy group in the United States. Our purpose is to take action to bring women into full participation in society---sharing equal rights, responsibilities and opportunities with men, while living free from discrimination. NOW's Top Six Priority Issues [are] advancing reproductive freedom, promoting diversity & ending racism, stopping violence against women, winning lesbian rights, achieving constitutional equality, and ensuring economic justice.
We completely agree. But I'm still gonna open the door for ya.
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Five years ago in C&J: October 29, 2008
JEERS to life around the bend. I know you're all dying to know the status of Kossack-turned-PUMA-Kool-Aid-drinker Larry Johnson's evidence-free investigation into the existence of a videotape in which Michelle Obama uses the word "Whitey." If such a tape ever saw the light of day, you see, it could SINK THE OBAMA CAMPAIGN!!! Well, I'm happy to report that Johnson's evidence is still rock-solid...if that rock happens to be talc:
None of my three main sources on [sic] who told me about the existence of a video recording of Michelle Obama making disparaging comments about white folks have backed off. Two of these sources are Democrats and are journalists. They were not trying to sabotage the Obama campaign. They were passing on something they believed to be true. The fact that my third source, a person who lives on the West Coast and is a Republican, has no ties whatsoever to the other two but told the same story persuaded me this "tape" exists. My Republican friend tells me that the McCain campaign intervened and requested the tape not be used.
Shortly after Johnson wrote those words he issued this urgent warning to all Americans:
And then he took the bus to the mall and sat in the vibrating chairs at Brookstone the rest of the day. Busy boy.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to a hundred years of playing in the muck. In California, a
sticky situation:
"Blurble blorp."
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The George C. Page Museum celebrates 100 years of digging for fossils in Los Angeles’ La Brea tar pits, The Associated Press reports.
According to the University of California at Berkeley, the La Brea tar pits hold one of the most diverse, best preserved, and most examined collections of Pleistocene vertebrates, including at least 59 species of mammal and more than 135 species of bird. … UC-Berkeley adds that tar pits develop when crude oil seeps to the surface through fissures in our planet’s crust; the light fraction of the oil evaporates and the heavy tar remains.
The tar pits are an amazing mix of oil, muck, and fossilized snakes and other reptiles that have been stuck in the same place for centuries on end. When students go there it's called a field trip. When Republicans go there it's called a dream vacation.
Have a nice Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Bill in Portland Maine brags about how he's 'literally not what everyone is talking about'
---Fox News
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