"Time for some traffic problems in Fort Lee" has morphed into a massive thing, with tentacles branching out in many directions, with all sorts of stories -- some maybe true, some maybe not -- with hundreds of people involved. Embarrassment and possible criminal trials are the likely end game for many people.
What follows is a possible approach for Chris Christie, in which I imagine memes and outcomes. I share this with you to see if anybody else thinks something like this is possible.
The following fictional account assumes that 1) Chris Christie has done something wrong and 2) at least some of the other people involved did something wrong.
What follows in purely fictional.
There's a huge Breaking News story that Chris Christie has been meeting with federal prosecutors for two days. Everybody is on pins and needles wondering what this means. Chris Christie schedules a press conference for 8 pm on a weeknight and the build-up/anticipation is akin to that time Obama announced Bin Laden was dead but beforehand everybody was guessing what the press conference was going to be about.
During this bombshell press conference, Christie announces something to the effect of:
I'm here to admit my guilt and ask for forgiveness. I got caught up in the incredible power game that makes up New Jersey and New York politics. I'm embarrassed and I regret the bad mistakes I've made. But the reason I've come forward now is because too many people are being dragged down due to my mistakes.
Dawn Zimmer is a colleague who I admire and she's doing a lot of good for New Jersey. Her story about meeting with Kim Guadagno is true. I can't continue letting everybody gang up on Dawn when she's done nothing wrong. Also, Kim was only carrying out the wishes of my administration.
Another person who has been unfairly treated is Bridget Kelly. She was only carrying out a stupid plan made up by me and my administration. I sincerely regret and apologize for what she's been through.
For the good of New Jersey and to spare my colleagues any more turmoil, I've met with federal prosecutors and I've admitted my part in these stories. I'm cooperating with authorities. My plea deal allows other people in my administration to avoid prosecution. In exchange for sparing my colleagues, I've agreed to resign as governor of New Jersey, effective immediately, and to surrender to authorities to begin a prison sentence that will be determined by a grand jury to convene in March.
I want to apologize to the people of New Jersey who put their trust in me but I broke that trust yadda yadda yadda. Especially the people hurt by Sandy and have been delayed in getting help due to greed and bureaucracy.
I apologize to people in my administration who have been harmed.
Finally, most importantly, I apologize to my family. Mary Pat and the kids, yadda yadda yadda.
In this country, our politics is run too much by money and influence. Especially in New Jersey where an organization like the Port Authority has too much power yadda yadda yadda. You can say I've done things wrong, and you can say I'm doing this to save my butt, and you'd be right. But one thing you can say about me, is that I accept responsibility for my mistakes and I'm not afraid to come clean yadda yadda yadda.
Following this press conference, the news is 24/7 all atwitter about Chris Christie's confession and upcoming prison sentence. Has this ever happened? What does it mean? Is Chris Christie over? Why can't more politicians be like him? Is this as bad as Monica Lewinsky? or worse? Watergate? At least Chris Christie accepted his punishment like a man!
Yes, he got caught up in power and lies but all politicians do. Only Chris Christie was man enough to admit and accept responsibility.
Christie is like a rock star, with paparazzi following his every move before he goes to prison. Reporters report from inside a "cell similar to the one Chris Christie will have" and what his life will be like.
He'll report to prison and Nancy Grace will cover the story wall-to-wall. His prison sentence begins. Various tabloid stories appear in which inmates tell of titillating details of serving time with Chris Christie. All the inmates love him. He's like one of the guys in Good Fellas serving time who have special supplies brought in and continue with life as usual.
Meanwhile, America loves the Chris Christie story and Hillary is elected president. Christie finishes his prison sentence and --again-- wall to wall coverage of his release. It's a huge "get" to whoever interviews him first. He does the interview circuit. He writes a book. His story is solidified as "great politician who gets things done and isn't afraid to admit his mistakes and of course won't let the power get to him again so he really tells it like it is!"
Hillary is re-elected. Chris Christie is a regular on all the news shows. America loves the story of his marriage, as Mary Pat stood by her man and their marriage is still strong. Christie becomes - again - the most powerful voice for the conservative movement.
Murmurs begin to surface of a possible Chris Christie presidential run in 2024. He doesn't want to, but people insist. Everybody would love to see him and Mary Pat in the White House. After all, you don't have to worry about his honesty after everything he's been through.
Women love him because he was so chivalrous with Dawn Zimmer. Tea Partiers love him because he's not afraid to tell the truth! Down with corruption!
America loves a comeback story. He solidified his reputation as working with Republicans and Democrats. He'll be 62 in 2024. Hillary was 68 when elected, George H.W. Bush was 64.
Chris Christie 2024?