While I was at NN14 I had a talk with someone I respect very much who is a fellow journeyer on the grief road.
This person suggested that I should step back from TGR a bit and let others carry the ball more.
I agree wholeheartedly, but am not sure how to bring that about.
I've been writing every week that no one else signed up, and that means I am writing most of the diaries.
But that makes me wonder whether every week I am scratching my own scabs and drawing blood in order to write something that may speak to others.
So I am resigned to having some open threads for a while, to see what people share on their own.
If someone else would like to host for a particular week, the hosting schedule is open as it always was, and I am happy to walk people through the steps of posting a diary if they need help.
I also want to encourage all contributors to feel free to put diaries in the queue, if you see another grief diary that may be relevant to others in this subcommunity. I will be more attentive about watching the queue and republishing those diaries while they are still relatively recent.
I want to see this series continue. No matter how few people comment, I know it has been helpful for many people to have a place to comment about their grief issues without having to post a whole diary. There are other series that only have a few followers and a few comments and still mean a great deal to the people who frequent them. I believe TGR can sustain itself in the same way.
So instead of putting the series on hiatus, we will have more open threads until people offer to host particular weeks.
If I am going through something specific that I need to share, I'll write a diary. But I do hope to hear from more of you. Diaries do not have to be long and involved with pictures and videos. Just a paragraph or two is enough to get the conversation started and let people know that the grief support community is gathering.
Last but not least, I want to encourage myself to be a source of comfort more often than I am the one seeking comfort. I believe that may be the best thing for my own personal recovery.
After seven years of grief, and in my special Year of 57, I declare for myself a "Grief Jubilee" -- I set myself free.
There are things I am holding on to that I can let go of (I hope this series is not one of those things, but we shall see what we shall see).
The things I can't let go of, I will be more intentional about finding ways to to learn to live with them, distract myself from them, and release the stress they cause so that the pain does not become overwhelming.
I want to end b emphasizing that every grieving person is still welcome here. If your grief is new, if you have been struggling for a while, if the hurt has been lingering for many years, if you are preparing yourself to lose someone dear, you are welcome here to post whatever you want to share, even if it doesn't make sense, even if you are repeating yourself, even if no one else wants to hear it, even if you are tired of hearing yourself! There are very few places on the net for people to post about their grief without judgment. I hope TGR will always be available for that purpose.
Welcome, fellow travelers on the grief journey
and a special welcome to anyone new to The Grieving Room.
We meet every Monday evening.
Whether your loss is recent, or many years ago;
whether you've lost a person, or a pet;
or even if the person you're "mourning" is still alive,
("pre-grief" can be a very lonely and confusing time),
you can come to this diary and say whatever you need to say.
We can't solve each other's problems,
but we can be a sounding board and a place of connection.
Unlike a private journal
here, you know: your words are read by people who
have been through their own hell.
There's no need to pretty it up or tone it down..
It just is.