On Friday I attended the Tisha B'Av service I wrote about last week. I was looking forward to it, just as I talked about. But, I hadn't prepared myself for the thoughts that prayer would elicit. In fact, I went almost blindly, with only vague thoughts that what I had conveyed in my diary might bring a different perspective and experience to the service and prayer than what I usually experience. I was not prepared for a mental jolt each time we recited prayers that included the term, ישראל (Israel), the first, second or third time. The word always lovingly said, in prayers of peace and joy for a homeland was now attached to a frantic worry about the content of the prayer because this time, the word had become a symbol of chaos, and conflict.
But there I was, sitting between my parents, knowing that what may be for the first time, a difference in belief and opinion regarding something of great importance, a departure from them along an unknown path. Did they know? Had they read the diary? I didn't dare ask or let on that I was disturbed.
We joined this synagogue about two and a half years ago. I was looking for a safe community in which to raise my daughter with a Jewish foundation. Over time, I became more involved in the community when one of the Rabbi's mentioned that I had been protesting the Keystone XL Pipeline, as she had seen on Facebook. That is when I received an email from the Food Justice Committee asking if I would be interested in presenting about my activism at the Tisha B'Av service. Their idea was to connect Tisha B'Av, an annual fast day that commemorates the burning of the first two temples in Jerusalem with Climate Change. I wrote about this presentation here. I had done what I never thought possible, that is, to talk in front of a large group without becoming head spinning dizzy!
Since then, I have joined the Food Justice Committee and written articles on Hydraulic Fracturing, Tisha B'Av and the California Drought, a Meatless Monday type article, and a couple on gun violence prevention all from a Jewish perspective. Then, through a congregation member who had been at the presentation, and talked with me a few times, I was invited to join a small group of individuals who were asked to share their concerns about community in a Listening Series format. I was one of about 100 members who joined groups of 4-5 individuals as part of the research phase for the Social Justice Organizing Committee to determine their new campaign. Being well read on Daily Kos, I had a lot to say, and with my new hearing aides, I could even hear the questions and comments that these ideas prompted, including the echo of the concern for community violence, in particular, gun violence prevention and our government's do nothing status as we watch individual by individual either die or mourn because of gun violence.
Knowing the committee would only consider those topics brought up the most frequently, I motivated a couple of acquaintances to inquire about attending a Listening Group to bring up gun violence prevention. They did. And this was the topic brought up by more congregation members than any other. Kudos to us.
And now I've been asked to write articles for the online newsletter of our local Jewish Federation. Damn! I'm excited... and confused... and torn... I've embraced this community and they have embraced me, yet I have to reconcile the fact that like with my parents, I may differ in opinion and belief in something so crucial to what many Jews believe to be the continued existence of Jewish people in our world. This has become as internal a conflict as there could possibly be. Even though I am approaching fifty, and my father has stated his support of me regardless of what I say here, the thought of not pleasing them, of hurting them is very painful. Someone recently said to me, "Well, you weren't alive during WWII," and, "If you had been alive during WWII you would feel differently." I've listened to this over and over in my head every day since then and it makes me feel angry. But, I'm not exactly sure what this anger is related to.
Here is what I do know. I support a peaceful and humanitarian based Israel, one congruent with the beliefs and teaching of Judaism.
In Jewish tradition, we emphasize the sanctity and primary value of human life. In fact, the Talmud teaches us, “He who takes one life it is as though he has destroyed the universe and he who saves one life it is as though he has saved the universe.”
(Sorry for the redundancy, but I don't think it could be said enough).
I am not denouncing Israel; I am denouncing its current political policies. Does this plea for humanity make me a traitor? Could this be what this individual is gently alluding to? If I had been alive during WWII would I only then understand the existential threat to Israel as this person does? Since I wasn't, does my opinion not matter? Isn't government propaganda and deception to gain support for a war killing thousands of civilians also an existential threat to the foundation of which Judaism is based, or frankly, any religion? War is not a normal state of existence, yet in Israel, it is accepted as such. Is any dissent against Israel then a dissent against our collective experience of persecution?
They are all animals” a tattooed man in his 30s muttered in our direction as we just got up to pay for our coffee. "Are you sure ALL of them are?" one of us replied later contemplating the stupidity of a casual response that could have easily provoked violence. Hamas is seen as a mortal, inhuman enemy, which must be crushed, decimated. In line with Prime Minister Netanyahu it is for many heir to Amalek in ancient times and Hitler. This is no apology but Israelis have been traumatized by the savage campaigns of suicide bombings of Hamas beginning in the 1990s, and so it is psychologically impossible for many to acknowledge that however criminal the actions of military resistance to the occupation sometimes are, in fact as soon as Hamas took power over Gaza in 2006 it became an intimate strategic partner of the militant Israeli government. Mash'al and Bibi are caught like lovers on an airplane about to crash in a deadly embrace for their own survival. Although the IDF now deals Hamas a military blow, the government is in fact desperate to keep the organization somehow alive.
From Letter from Tel Aviv - Hilla Dayan and PW Zuidhof
Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 07/31/2014 - 3:21pm
Why do Israelis support a costly ground invasion of Gaza?
I do not absolve Hamas of wrong doing. As a Jew, I am speaking on the policies of Israel because of my inherent connection. My heart goes out to innocent Israeli and Palestinian people who are suffering because of the policies of their governments.
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