From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
An Open Letter to America
Dear America,
Hello! How are you? I am fine. I know you're busy, so I'll keep this short.
A couple months back, on election day, you let Republicans keep the majority in the House of Representatives and gave them the majority in the Senate. That's how democracy works and God bless ya.
One of the first things those Republican victors have decided to do is take a claw hammer to your Social Security. Strip it down, turn it over to Wall Street bankers, raise the retirement age, threaten disability payments, the whole nine yards.
I just thought you might like to know.
Have a great day!
Hugs,
Billy
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold...
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, January 14, 2015
Note: Hey, America, knock it off with all the stupid Hitler comparisons. You're tarnishing my brand. Thx. ---Adolf
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3 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til Martin Luther King, Jr. Day:
5
Days 'til the
417 Magazine Whiskey Fest in Springfield, Missouri:
3
Number of Republican climate-change deniers in the House and Senate, respectively:
131 / 39
(Source:
Think Progress)
Percent of homicides in Maine that are domestic-violence-related:
50%
(Source:
The Portland Press Herald)
U.S. drivers over 65 in 2008 and estimated for 2020, respectively, according to AARP:
32 million, 40 million
Drop in prescription drug abuse among high school seniors in the last ten years:
35%
(Source: NIH drug use survey)
Number of tips Keith Olbermann got in his tip jar after posting his
first diary at Daily Kos seven years ago today:
1,365
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 180 (including 5 volcanoes and 1 resurrection of St. Scott Brown). Soul Protection Factor 8 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: The American Kennel Club welcomes four new dog breeds…
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CHEERS to assembling the knights of the round triangulation table. Its hooves throwing dirt and moss into the air as it speeds through Freedom Forest, the mighty steed carries the brave warrior clad in freshly-forged armor, heart pounding with anticipation of battles to come and victories to savor, toward Castle Clinton:
Sir Podesta
White House adviser John Podesta “will take on a senior advisory role in Hillary Clinton’s emerging presidential bid after he leaves the administration in February, three people familiar with the matter said. The move is one of the most definitive signs yet that Mrs. Clinton is building the apparatus to launch a 2016 campaign,” the Wall Street Journal reports.
Tomorrow we fight. But tonight: grog and song!
CHEERS to more signs that net neutrality might become a thing. First it was FCC chair Tom Wheeler indicating that Americans should be entitled to zippy internet access with no qualifications. Now it's President Obama's turn to make the case when he straps on
Jetpack One and blasts off for Cedar Falls, Iowa (which has superior internet speeds), where he'll talk about improving broadband connections. You can watch Obama's Oval Office preview, where he becomes the first sitting United States president in history to speak to the American people
using an iPad. You can read the Republican response to Obama's broadband proposals today by standing next to your nearest fax machine.
JEERS to Alternate Reality Chuck. The point of having a gas tax---and raising it for the first time since 1993---is to fund the nearly insolvent Highway Trust Fund so we can restore our roads and bridges to reasonable condition. Pretty simple, right? Even conservative "brain thinker" Charles Krauthammer is totally on board with raising the gas tax---not by a few cents but, golly, by a whole dollar! Except this is his plan in a nutshell:
Chuckles' gas tax doesn't fix this.
1) Raise the gas tax by $1 and put the money in the Social Security trust fund
2) Cut people's Social Security tax by the same amount
3) Consumers can spend their tax savings any way they want
4) ?????
5) The Highway Trust Fund gets replenished
6) Roads and bridges get fixed!
I think the question marks are the part where you light the bong.
CHEERS to a somewhat enduring career in animation. Unreal---anyone born in 1987 or later has never known life without The Simpsons. After spending a couple seasons as "shorts" on The Tracey Ullman Show, Homer & Co. began their regular run as a half-hour show---with the full title sequence---on Fox on this date in 1990. For the most part, it's as sharp as ever, and they apparently have no plans to quit anytime soon. Today in the C&J cafeteria:
…and keep 'em comin'.
JEERS to the worst people in the world. What is wrong with people??? Thanks a lot, New Hope Ministries in Colorado. Your sense of empathy is just what Christ would've asked for…if Christ's sense of empathy was the not-having-it kind:
"Never mind me. I just
need to take a moment."
Vanessa Collier's friends say the funeral was canceled by the church 15 minutes after the service was supposed to start because the church would not allow a picture to be shown of Collier proposing to her wife. The open casket and flowers were in place and about 170 people were in attendance. [...]
[M]oments prior to the funeral service, a video that was supposed to be played during the funeral was reviewed by church officials. The church asked the video to be edited in order to proceed. Rolando says the family refused to take the picture of Collier's proposal out of the video, and the funeral had to be moved to the mortuary across the street.
Every time I think we've maxed out on the number of circles of hell our species requires, we always seem to need one more.
CHEERS to stopping with all the shooting and the banging and the bayoneting and whatnot. 231 years ago today, on January 14, 1784, Congress ratified the Treaty of Paris, officially ending our War of Independence. It's a day to remember the post-Yorktown negotiations that began in 1782 and were hammered out in Paris. And, of course, it's also a day for Republicans to blast Obama for not going!
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Ten years ago in C&J: January 14, 2005
JEERS to today's Iraq update. Two more U.S. troops dead, deputy police chief of Baghdad assassinated, the election commission in Anbar province resigned and went into hiding, and we dropped a 500lb bomb on the wrong house, killing more innocent civilians. On the other hand, a new crate of soccer balls arrived for the kiddies. USA, USA.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to the very excellent reason I'm posting C&J from inside a thermal sleeping bag in front of our local comic book store. Star Wars Episode VII may not be coming out for another 11 months, but the new Marvel comic book---issue #1---comes out TO-freakin'-DAY!!! Says Dylan Todd at Comics Alliance:
As the mighty Chewbacca once
said: "Wahhrhrrh!!!" Oh, so true.
[Jason] Aaron’s script is a lot of fun, with the voices and motivations of the characters expressed faithfully, and a story with some really great turns and a reveal that I don’t want to spoil, but one that he just nails. … [John] Cassaday’s storytelling is on point, and in terms of pure drawing, everybody looks like they just stepped off the screen and “acts” like you’d expect them to.
Marvel’s new Star Wars #1 is an impressive first issue, showcasing Aaron’s mixture of adventure and gravitas and Cassaday’s ability to capture likenesses. It has me excited for this kind of comic in a way that I haven’t been in a long time. … It’s almost as if the first issue of Aaron and Cassaday’s Star Wars has filled me with… a new hope?
The comic store opens at 10. That should be just enough time to get myself unstuck from the sidewalk. May the force to bully my way to the front of the line be with me.
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Beachbot Draws Lines, Dogs, Bill in Portland Maine in the Sand
---Discovery
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