From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Oh! More Things I Know:
> The 2015 enrollment period for health insurance through the ACA ends in 10 days.
> For future blizzard preparedness, take it from me: your emergency supplies of nachos and cheese will be depleted at twice the rate you think they will.
Also: this is a thing.
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> Nobody wants to shake Senator Thom Tillis's hand anymore.
> Another thing you can add to President Obama's list of meager accomplishments: saved the internet from destruction.
> A new confidence-index poll shows that the percent of measles viruses in America who believe the country is moving in the right direction is at its highest level in fifty years.
> Trickle-down economics doesn’t lift all boats. It just floats the yachts.
> Coincidentally, "Get out of here, you low-life scum" isn't just John McCain yelling at members of Code Pink. It's also the worst-selling Hallmark greeting card of all-time.
> I'm in negotiations to direct the touring production of Fifty Shades of Grey on Ice.
> It took Republicans about a millisecond to start ignoring the "increase border security" part of President Obama's executive orders on immigration.
> The obscene amount of money the Koch brothers have to spend to try and swing elections shows just how unpopular their positions are.
> Karl Rove says the Seahawks could still pull an upset once the rest of the points from Ohio are counted. Peggy Noonan agrees, adding that "all the vibrations are right."
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, February 5, 2015
Note: Senator E. Coli reminds the germ community to wash your tentacles when you're done using a human. It's the law!
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9 days!!!
By the Numbers:
Days 'til John Oliver returns to
Last week Tonight on HBO:
3
Days 'til the
Winter Carnival in Bridgton, Maine:
9
Age of Hank Aaron today:
81
Percent tax Pres. Obama is proposing on U.S. companies' foreign profits to raise $478 billion for infrastructure upkeep:
14%
Increase in U.S. pay and benefits last year, the biggest calendar-year increase since 2008:
2.2%
(Source: Labor Dept.)
Percent of store-brand dietary supplements sold at Wal-Mart that contained the ingredients listed on the labels:
4%
(Source: NY AG's office)
Amount turned down in 2008 by Edith Macefield for
the Seattle house that inspired the
movie
Up:
$1 million
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Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment:
I laughed until tears ran down my cheeks Sunday morning. There was Karl Rove (a.k.a. "Bush's Brain") on television, chatting with the Sabbath gasbags about how the real champion of campaign finance reform is ... George W. Bush.
This was funny enough, but Rove went on to say solemnly that John McCain has taken money from lobbyists and special-interest groups! Of course, by then I was on the floor.
---February, 2000
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Service dogs puppy cam!!!
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CHEERS to maintaining an even playing field. Congratulations, dirty fucking hippies! On behalf of all Americans, you won the battle for net neutrality. From the FCC Chairman Tom Wheeler, aka the horse's mouth itself:
He chose...wisely.
This week, I will circulate to the members of the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) proposed new rules to preserve the internet as an open platform for innovation and free expression. […]
Originally, I believed that the FCC could assure internet openness through a determination of “commercial reasonableness” under Section 706 of the Telecommunications Act of 1996. While a recent court decision seemed to draw a roadmap for using this approach, I became concerned that this relatively new concept might, down the road, be interpreted to mean what is reasonable for commercial interests, not consumers.
That is why I am proposing that the FCC use its Title II authority to implement and enforce open internet protections. Using this authority, I am submitting to my colleagues the strongest open internet protections ever proposed by the FCC. These enforceable, bright-line rules will ban paid prioritization, and the blocking and throttling of lawful content and services.
I've been waiting a long time to say this: "Hey, greedy telcos:
buffer this."
CHEERS to making house calls. Like Kossack brainwrap (aka Charles Gaba, America's official go-to guy for Obamacare stats), I was wondering why the Surgeon General hadn’t weighed in on the current wave of anti-vaccination ridiculousness. That came to an end yesterday when Vivek Murthy entered his first official fray:
And as a bonus he came out in defense of medical marijuana as a possible benefit for various conditions. For instance, it's a miracle cure for nutrient deficiencies, especially those involving low levels of pad Thai and German chocolate cake. From what I'm, uh, told.
JEERS to taking an RPG blast to your credibility. Apparently NBC Nightly Infotainment anchor Brian Williams had this thing about telling people he got shot down in a helicopter over in Iraq---presumably to, I dunno, get people to buy him drinks or something. Anyway, he now wants you to know that mistakes were made and his memory was failed. His story never happened. So I guess it was all just a…chopper whopper.
CHEERS to the Illinois governor who took on the Kansas general. Happy 115th birthday to Adlai Stevenson II. He lost to Dwight Eisenhower in both 1952 and 1956. (Then again, I think God herself would have, too.) But as U.N. Ambassador he pleasantly surprised the Kennedy administration by giving the Russians hell during the Cuban missile crisis. And he sure understood Republicans:
1952 campaign poster shows
Stevenson wasn't afraid of
embracing Truman's legacy.
"A hypocrite is the kind of politician who would cut down a redwood tree, then mount the stump and make a speech for conservation. "
"I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends... that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them."
And I love this:
We travel together, passengers on a little space ship, dependent on its vulnerable reserves of air and soil; all committed for our safety to its security and peace; preserved from annihilation only by the care, the work and, I will say, the love we give our fragile craft. We cannot maintain it half fortunate, half miserable, half confident, half despairing, half slave to the ancient enemies of man, half free in a liberation of resources undreamed of until this day. No craft, no crew can travel with such vast contradictions. On their resolution depends the survival of us all.
In other words: nice knowin' ya.
JEERS to the rising tide. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, North Carolina coasters, but you're going to…
Hey, welcome to Raleigh circa 2100! Come on up!
...see more frequent and more destructive floods at high tide over the next 30 years, several studies say---even on mild, sunny days---as rising sea levels shove the Atlantic Ocean higher onto our shores. … That’s because the seas are expected to rise by as much as 12 inches in the next 30 years, lifting high tide that much higher on the northern Outer Banks.
More flooding will close roads, clog storm sewers and damage streets and other public structures that aren’t made to hold up against inundation and salt-water exposure, NOAA said. Even moderate floods can hurt businesses, isolate neighborhoods and disrupt transportation.
Governor Pat McCrory says he's processing the studies carefully to deal with the problem in the proper Republican fashion. His exact words: "Pass the ketchup."
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Ten years ago in C&J: February 5, 2005
CHEERS to reassurances. Condi Rice, spreading evil in Britain, says we've decided not to invade Iran just yet. That's a relief---my weekend's totally booked.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to a profession full of highs and lows. Happy Weatherpersons' Day! After shoveling four feet of snow off my Wikipedia page, I see that it "recognizes individuals in the fields of meteorology, weather forecasting and broadcast meteorology, as well as volunteer storm spotters and observers. It is observed on the birthday of John Jeffries, one of the United States' first weather observers who took daily measurements starting in 1774." Yes, it took our best scientific minds over 200 years to build our modern forecasting tools, and You Tube mere minutes to assemble the outtakes. Enjoy…
Forecasters predict National Weatherpersons' Day will blow over within the next 16 hours, followed by an 80 percent chance of lingering National Weatherpersons' Day hangovers. Mostly among weatherpersons.
Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Mars is nifty. It's fascinating. It's red and rocky and we currently have a couple of high-tech rovers checking it out. But it's no Cheers and Jeers.
---CNET
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