What better way to honor the dead
Who fought in our wars, the princess said,
Than popsicles flavored with champagne?
Pardon me while I abstain.
Bubbly is nice, I don't begrudge it
But I can't afford it on my budget.
And turning champagne into ice
Has nothing to do with sacrifice.
Surely there's a better way
To celebrate Memorial Day.
The infamous words of Marie Antoinette
Those in power should not forget:
In retrospect it was a mistake
For her to say "Let them eat cake."
That beautiful but clueless queen
Wound up on the guillotine.
Will Ivanka have any better luck
In advising us champagne ice to suck?