Tucker's shallow Jacuzzi defense

Salon's War Room '04 has this squib on Tucker Carlson's Jacuzzi defense.  Tim Grieve asked Tucker in halls of the Fleet Center about the flak he's been taking (thanks in large part to Hunter going postal) for calling Edwards a "jacuzzi case" lawyer....

... Grieve describes the exchange beginning with Tucker's response:    

"My contention is not that the girl wasn't grievously injured or deserves compensation, nor is it that he doesn't have the right to make $8 million off her suffering. My only point is that if you're going to make 7 or 8 or 6 or whatever million dollars off her suffering, don't claim it's an altruistic act," Carlson said.

Right, but isn't calling it a "Jacuzzi case" -- without further explanation -- somehow dismissive of what actually happened? "Are you going to lecture me? Are you going to ask me a question or lecture me? My point is not that it's a wine-and-cheese thing, and I'm not against Jacuzzis. That's not my point at all."
[my note:  What does "a wine-and-cheese thing" even mean?  But it's good to know that Tucker is not anti-jacuzzi. Phfew.]

Carlson said calling the Lakey tragedy a "Jacuzzi case" is just a "shorthand" way to ask whether Edwards should really be seen as acting altruistically for the "little people" when he made so much money off the case. "I'm merely saying that, if you're going to make all that money, don't turn around and tell me that you're better than I am," Carlson said.

Does "Jacuzzi case" really convey that point? Couldn't he call it something else? "Maybe I could, but that's an evasion of the point I'm making. You're getting into whether I should call it a 'pool case.' OK, fine, call it a 'pool case.' I'm sorry I called it a 'Jacuzzi case.'"

There you have it.  Tucker reluctantly acknowledges that he should have demeaned the disembowlment of a five-year old girl by calling it a "Pool case" rather than a "Jacuzzi case."

Of course, none of his response makes sense.  Calling Edwards a "jacuzzi case" lawyer is not short hand for calling him a "$8-million-per-case-contingency-fee lawyer."  Tucker is clearly invoking the "McDonald's coffee case"
(which has also been grossly misrepresented and trivialized), and the only reason to call it a "jacuzzi" case rather than a "pool drain" case is that jacuzzi sounds funnier and more trivial.

So there you have it.  Crossfire's Conservative Team:

Novak    -- Douchebag for Liberty
Carlson  -- Douchebag.  With a Bow Tie.