open letter to leftist cis-het dudes

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Sunday June 01, 2014 · 12:03 PM PDT

2014/06/01 · 12:03

I'm not saying that it's impossible for cis-het men to be feminists, but I am saying that it comes at the sacrifice of being a sexist, misogynist & a potential rapist.

you're not one of the good guys.

if you think that some cis-het woman should be grateful that you're not one of those "other" dudes, you know - cis-het dudes that openly insult or joke about rape...then, you're not a feminist. in that case, you differ only from those other cis-het dudes because you hide your entitlement, misogyny and rape threats. you don't get a "fuck a feminist free card" for setting a higher bar for circumstances where you would demean or rape.

you don't get pussy if you say that you like feminism

feminism is not a gene pool. if you tell a cis-het feminist woman that you agree with or support feminism, she does not then need to fuck you. there's really nothing more to say on this one.

how to tell if you're a sexist, misogynist and/or rapist - and not a feminist

do you ever find yourself thinking to yourself; or telling a cis-het woman that she if she gets raped by one of those other dudes, she'd learn her lesson (and her lesson being that you and your special penis are what she should be grateful for)?
do you think feminist means "likes to fuck"?
do you think that cis-het women are "real women" but that trans women are not?
do you get angry when you tell a cis-het woman that you like feminism and she doesn't reward you with friendship or fucking?
do you get even angrier when, even after telling a cis-het woman how leftist and feminist you are, she calls you sexist or misogynist or not feminist?
do you get angry because cis-het women take you "out of context" and they fail to listen to your explanation of how you're really one of the "good guys"?
do you think it's OK for a groom to fuck a stripper at a bachelor party but not for a bride to fuck a male stripper at the bachelorette party?
do you think "bitch" or "pussy" or "cunt" are insults?
do you think that pussy is something to "get"?

if you answer 'yes' to any of these, you're playing at feminism so that you can get your dick wet. nobody believes you when you call yourself feminist / leftist / progressive - nobody, that is, except other leftist fail doodz.

(posted at SexGenderBody's tumblr)

race is not a choice

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Friday May 23, 2014 · 9:24 AM PDT

2014/05/23 · 09:24

I've been working on a typewriter and then scanning the work to post it online. This is a piece on my own "nice-guy racism".

Posted at SexGenderBody's tumblr.

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Tuesday April 01, 2014 · 2:16 PM PDT

2014/04/01 · 14:16

since most of us progressive white dudes do not really don't feel safe being talked to about race by anyone else, I felt compelled to say my piece on this issue as a card carrying white progressive dude.

(note: if you feel compelled to tell me that "not all white progressive dudes are like this and that you are one of the good guys...please don't. like, ever.)

if you are white, male ID'd and progressive - this letter is addressed to you.

posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday March 27, 2014 · 8:28 PM PDT

2014/03/27 · 20:28

I got into a conversation the other day with my friend, about this post:

http://www.thenation.com/blog/178950/tweeters-world-unite

I said that a good strategy would be to give up on whitespace ever coming around, tell the bastards to fuck off smartly and carve out some posts in languages other than english because the thieves are too lazy to translate or learn another language.

she replied:

I read all of it and I disagree at the same spot I usually do

"If Brown bodies create social streams in their own cultures..."

The onus is on us (again) to escape such colonial forms of knowledge production

this really set me off emotionally. I tried to restate my ideas, and that didn’t assuage me. I didn’t want to prove her wrong, I didn’t think she was wrong, I just wanted to not have to agree with her. then I realized that I wanted to deny that she was right. and I thought, “oh my…” and I knew that I had to question my motives.

why was I so attached to fleeing from whitespace? I wanted to believe that I was cynical, resigned and willing to leave whitespace. I wanted to avoid confronting my own active participation in sustaining whitespace and benefitting from it. I wanted to leave whitespace and I did not want to admit that there is no way to leave, no place to run.

whitespace can only be maintained or dismantled. that’s it. there are no other choices. and no one can do your work or my work for us.

posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr Read More

sgb book review: "little, big" by john crowley

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Saturday March 15, 2014 · 8:47 AM PDT

2014/03/15 · 08:47

ok, this book is great if you’re a rapist who likes fantasies about how magical rape can be.

I read this book 30 years ago when I was in the ‘green berets’ and somehow did not remember that part of this story. perhaps my tolerance for reading about violence was skewed. with all the violent things I was trained to do, I didn’t let anything upset me. plus, I was still a drinking alcoholic. regardless - I noticed it this time.

posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Saturday March 08, 2014 · 9:32 PM PST

2014/03/08 · 21:32

I'm not from India nor did I ever vacation there. I don't take yoga and I don't own the Kama Sutra (why bother, when I can download it for free, anyway?) So, I'm not an expert and I'm probably more wrong than right. No cookies for pointing that out. That said, here goes anyway.

Recently - Arundhati Roy agreed to write an introductory essay to "Annihilation of Caste: The Annotated Critical edition by B.R. Ambedkar" which she titled, "The Doctor and the Saint: An introduction". Hindu nationalists like the BJP love to get their outrage underpants all bunched up whenever Roy does anything other than keep her mouth shut, basically. Roy's introduction to Ambedkar's work may cause Hindu nationalists like the BJP to be outraged that she dare to say anything that is anti-Hindu (which is basically anything that is not unquestioningly pro-Hindu/BJP). The BJP is for all intents and purposes, India’s GOP. So, their outrage comes as no surprise for her association with a speech that Ambedkar wrote to challenge progressive Hindus on their own desire to reap the benefits of caste are antithetical to their stated organizational goals and perpetuating the targeted oppression of lower castes.

Posted at SexGenderBody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Monday February 10, 2014 · 7:55 AM PST

2014/02/10 · 07:55

so, I got invited to read the millenium trilogy by a friend at the same time she was, with the idea being that there are rape depictions and that we’d keep each other company during the triggering parts of the tales, in some fashion or another. for my part, this book club thingy was helpful because it gave me an external excuse to listen to audiobooks on my work commutes, thereby making them far less stressful.

posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Saturday November 23, 2013 · 11:58 PM PST

2013/11/23 · 23:58

The ugly truth of my past thoughts and actions is that for the first half of my life, I was ignorant, uninformed, sexist and dangerous to trans identified persons.

I would laugh at or remain silent when trans persons were mocked on TV, film or in conversations among people I knew.
I got my ~~information~~ prejudices from hearsay, movies & TV. The view I held was that trans ID'd persons were to be feared like those portrayed as disturbed murderers in crime dramas or as the butt of jokes.
From grade school to high school, I would laugh at gossip and whisper campaigns of cruelty and insinuation involving the mention of being trans as a joke.
I didn't know one trans ID'd person and made no effort to meet any.
I believed that trans women were not to be trusted and that they were as likely as not, to be deceptive and manipulative in presenting to men as women without revealing their genitals until after the men had committed sexual or emotional desires.
I did not consider the impact of my actions / inaction / complicity / agreement in these prejudices, at all, in any way. I have no idea how my prejudices impacted anyone directly or indirectly. I never struck or verbally assaulted any trans ID'd person, but my participation in the majority discrimination and devaluation of trans ID'd persons was part of the culture of cruelty that takes and crushes human lives. People died. I didn't help to save them. I let them die. I silently and anonymously helped attack and isolate them.

Posted at the SexGenderBody tumblr.

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday October 31, 2013 · 6:30 AM PDT

2013/10/31 · 06:30

in a nutshell, this is a narrative of what feminism has meant to me through the years and where I go to seek and express feminism in my life now. to a good extent, my progressive / liberal politics have formed and expressed along similar lines.

feminism in my life, came from my mother along with a love of Count Basie and Dave Brubeck. she was a lifelong registered Democrat and feminist. growing up in the 60's, with civil rights, feminism and my first exposure to concepts of treating people with fairness and equality, these things all became synonymous to me. we lived in South Chicago, in a neighborhood that housed the steel mill there. it was white as hell, mostly from Slavic, Irish & Polish ancestry. other kids' moms would be complaining about "the Mexicans" and "the blacks", but my mother was an island of equality, dignity and rights. she was friendly with those families but distinct in her regard of race and gender.

my father was a fairly sexist dude and in a very cheesy 60's and 70's manner. he'd call a waitress 'love' and have this whole cheeseball aura. it was pretty embarrassing. he used to tell me that because I was his oldest child and a son, that when he left the house - I was in charge. this was bullshit of course, because mom was in charge. I never felt comfortable stepping into the "cheeseball dude" role, so I just let him say that shit without much of a response from me. it made him happy, I suppose, plus I had zero chance in getting him to stop.

Posted at SexGenderBody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday October 10, 2013 · 7:23 AM PDT

2013/10/10 · 07:23

* note: as usual, my film reviews are just my collected thoughts. don't expect Roger Ebert here (read: I swear a lot)...just sayin' *

So, I went to an advanced screening of this film, "God Loves Uganda" tonight. It was sponsored by Political Research Associates and shown at the SAIC. I can't remember how I found out about it...twitter, I suppose...but I'm glad that I did go. There was a panel discussion afterward as well.

There were some snacks and chatting beforehand, but I had a bout of social awkwardness and ate cookies off to the side and tooled around on tumblr, etc.

The film is a documentary about how US evangelicals are shaping anti-gay hate in Uganda. The film covers several aspects of the bill before the Ugandan parliament.

Posted at SexGenderBody's tumblr

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Sunday September 08, 2013 · 7:00 AM PDT

2013/09/08 · 07:00

a black man died and two white men who were trained to save lives, let him die in front of them.

for a number of years, I was a soldier in the “green berets”. I was trained as a medical NCO, which in civilian skills is a mish-mosh of surgical, laboratory, health, dental & veterinary skills.

one night while we were training with some troops from other nations, my team and several others made parachute jumps into operations. on the ground, word spread that one of the other teams had a fatality during the jump. weeks later, when we returned to camp, I learned who and how.

(posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr)

sexgenderbody

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday September 05, 2013 · 6:00 AM PDT

2013/09/05 · 06:00

I was reading a conversation about how men should talk to their sons about Robin Thicke and women in general. It was along the lines of how to be “good men”.

Something has been nagging at me for some time now:

the notion that women are (X) and therefore, men should “step up” and not rape / assault / be sexist shits

Men should stop raping women but NOT because of who women are —it’s not up to women to prove themselves “worthy” of not being raped anyway—but because of who we’re not: somehow better than women. Men raping / assaulting / harassing has nothing to do with the targeted persons and everything to do with men.

(posted at sexgenderbody's tumblr)

Newer
Older

RSS

open letter to leftist cis-het dudes

race is not a choice

open letter from a progressive white dude to other progressive white dudes defending stephen colbert

brown voices, white spaces

sgb book review: "little, big" by john crowley

This is a comment on some things in Indian politics and US politics.

my review of the 'millennium trilogy' or 'the girl who was actually clint eastwood with boobs'

I was a teenage transmisogynistic monster

my feminist walkabout [why I am a Democrat]

"God Loves Uganda"

white privilege is measured in blood

on “men setting good examples” and other forms of stomach cancer