I think I'm going to try a stab at replying to the Koolaid drinkers who write stupid letters to the editor in local newspapers by posting a diary. I'm too tempted to respond to them in the paper, and that would just make my wife mad.
You KNEW this letter was going to be DAMN funny when the writer's number one reason for writing this heartfelt thank you was because of Georgie's ability to overcome his addiction to booze (she forgot ... I guess ... about the drugs).
Read and laugh on the flip.
Here's a fine piece of OpEd from Linda, writing in the Rochester (Minn.) Post-Bulletin:
Thank you, Mr. President:
- For taking responsibility and overcoming alcohol addiction and becoming president of the United States.
- Having the intelligence to graduate from Harvard and Yale.
- Former President Clinton lied to a federal grand jury and, by example, showed our young people that oral sex really isn't sex. Thank you, President Bush, for being a role model of faith, integrity and character.
- The grace and humility you've shown under vicious attacks from Hollywood, mainstream media, Democrats, book authors and even your own party.
- Trying to deal openly and honestly with Social Security, health care, immigration, education, economy and taxes.
- The courage and conviction to defend your policies and answer questions three times on Bill O'Reilly. Others have been too cowardly to go on with him.
- Our nephew returned from Iraq in September. Thank you for honoring those who died September 11th and those military personnel killed and injured in the Middle East and for defending this country and all Americans to the best of your ability.
One man can make a difference, and every man should try. That's all we can ask of any man. To do your best. And you have.
For those of you who voted for change in the last election, I hope you're happy. Remember, the grass isn't greener on the other side -- you still have to mow the lawn.
Linda K. Williamson
See ... I KNEW you would enjoy Linda's lovely letter of appreciation to our dear leader. Let's quickly address these:
- Yes, Linda, it is wonderful that George is no longer boozin' it. And, don't forget the drug addiction ... Damn lucky he didn't do some jail time for his little habit.
- Yes, Linda. George is a VARY SMURT HUMEN BEEING. You are right. No stupid rich kid ever got into these places because of their daddy.
- First, in my opinion, Billy Boy doin' Monica with a cigar was a beautiful act of love. In turn, God blessed Monica with a well-shaped mouth and it was her duty to share that gift. BTW, you seen the polls lately about how much Americans trust Georgiepoo? Whad up with that? How could they think he is a liar? How could Georgie's high negative approval ratings match Billy's high postitive approval ratings? Must be the mainstream media ... see the next point ...
- Thank God that Fox News isn't mainstream media. You just keep watchin' ol' Fox. You will continue to feel good about yourself.
- Hmmmm ... yea ... maybe you are right with the openly and honestly. You have to look past the fact that he is a complete idiot ... so that his proposed solutions make one really wonder when Yale and Harvard are going to take back those diplomas.
- Linda, Linda, Linda ... NOBODY can argue with you on this one. This point is solid. Rock solid.
- Linda, I just went out and bought a "Support Our Troops" sticker for my SUV (still lookin' for the perfect, huge-ass SUV to go with it). It's pink. I like it better than the yellow one. George should get one for his presidential limo ... let the world know how much he supports the troops.
Lovely analogy to end your letter Linda. However ... last time I checked, if the grass wasn't greener on the other side, you probably didn't have to mow it ... but, whatever ... I'm not really happy, but I am happier.
Keep writing Linda K. Williamson.
(Moron. Harvard and Yale give you a degree, too?)