Rupert Murdoch, the Australian media tycoon, has offered to buy the Congressional Record for $10 billion. Having just successfully acquired the Dow Jones newspaper asset, The Wall Street Journal, Murdoch has sent a firm offer to the House and Senate Appropriations Committees to acquire the Congressional Record. (It was sent to the Appropriations Commiittees, Mudoch said, because he specializes in Appropriations, himself, and he felt that would appreciate the benefits of his offer. Also, Murdoch noted, they probably need the money for on-going expenses related to debt service and Empire Building, which he favors.)
Murdoch noted the payoffs that would result from the sale:
- By being part of the Murdoch media conglomerate, the work of the Congress could be made much more efficient. In fact, there might not need to be a Congress, just a Congressional Record report of what the proceedings ought to be. There would thus be a possibility of significant downsizing of the federal government by eliminating the Congress and its staffs, thus saving billions of taxpayer dollars. Valuable Capitol Hill real estate would also be freed up for more profitable uses.
+ Murdoch also noted that the Congressional Record is still published on fairly high quality paper. He has proposed a two-step process whereby the Record would be published in the first phase on cheaper newsprint, perhaps as an insert in the Wall Street Journal. Later, the Record could become entirely electronic, thus saving thousands of trees each year. Murdoch hoped environmentalists would support the sale given the reduction in carbon emissions that would ensue.
Democrats on the Hill generally welcomed the Murdoch proposal, suggesting that the $10 billion be earmarked for improved body armor for our troops in Iraq and, if there are funds left over, for a bridge inspection program in selected states. Most Republicans, however, reacted negatively to the Murdoch proposal. Senator Dildo (R-West Dakota) spoke for the group. "The Congressional Record" is worth far more than $10 billion, Dildo said)." "We spend more than that in a week in Iraq. Let's keep national priorities in balance. The Congress should not part with the Congressional Record for less than $50 billion." Murdoch's reaction was a terse, "Well, we might be able to arrange that." The Democrats' Senator Dennis responded on the floor of the Senior Chamber with a proposal to hold a national referendum on the idea. "Let the people speak," he intoned to an empty gallery. "This sale should not simply be the result of a Kangaroo Court." Murdoch, when informed of Senator Dennis's referendum suggestion replied: "Kangaroo Courts work. I know. After all, I'm an Australian." Lawyers for the two parties are scheduled to meet next week to iron out the details to consummate the deal.