I recently received, from an unnamed source, a draft of a press release from a new anti-Obama attack group, a so-called '527' group.
As first noted by the Clinton campaign, Senator Obama's ambitions to become President go all the way back to his kindergarten days. But the Clinton campaign didn't tell you the whole story. The whole story is much much worse, according to this group.
I reproduce the press release below. Bear in mind that according to my source (who I have named "Deep Crayon"), this is only a draft. Additional facts about Senator Obama may be included in the final release
Kindergarten Classmates For Truth
Kindergarten Kiddies For Truth
Senator Obama has claimed to be for a "new type of politics", but a careful look at his record, and extensive interviews with his colleagues has revealed the Real Barack Obama:
- On eight separate occasions, Barack Obama was observed eating paste intended for classroom activities. America does not need a President who exhibits such wanton disregard for the property of others. Nor is America ready for a President who regularly consumed common adhesives. Indeed, we must ask whether Senator Obama is still a closet paste-eater.
- According to classmate Susie Smith, Barack Obama repeatedly refused to sit next to her because she "had cooties". Senator Obama, will you disavow your sexist past?
- A careful review of Barack Obama's schoolwork from this period has revealed a systematic inability to stay within the lines while coloring books. America deserves a President who can obey the law.
- Barack Obama's teacher has stated that he lost a shoe one day, and had to have another one brought in from home. Can America truly be led by a man who can't even keep track of his own clothing?
- As corroborated by several classmates, Barack Obama constantly snored during naptime, preventing them from taking part in this critical activity.
- Reports indicate that Barack Obama preferred saltine crackers over graham crackers for snacks. Why does Senator Obama hate America?
It's time for Senator Obama to tell the whole truth about his kindergarten experience.
-dms