This just in at Crank Central...our exclusive sources have leaked us a memo from the McCain campaign detailing the top ten reasons why Sarah Palin was named his running mate. Details on the flip side.
- Highest recommendation from Search Committee chairman Dan Quayle.
- We really need to shore up Alaska's electoral votes at this point.
- We need an advocate for a Bridge to Nowhere to counter the Bridge to the Future.
- We will be able to capitalize on the pro-Monty Python vote by suggesting she is related to Michael Palin.
- The NRA told us to nominate a life member OR ELSE.
- Nothing will say "attack dog" more than the former "Sarah Barracuda" of the Wasilla High School Warriors.
- What she did for the 8000 scattered residents of Wasilla on the town council two years ago, she can do for America.
- Already has experience as a second-place finisher from the Miss Alaska contest.
- Extensive foreign policy experience in flying over Canada on the way to Dayton.
- Ready on Day 1 to assume Presidency.