Things are hard all over. Even porn industry moguls are groping for a stimulous package.
Debbie did Dallas.
Porn moguls Larry Flynt and Joe Francis are doing D.C.
Don’t laugh, but they are bending over and laying down the pornoeconotile dysfunctional gauntlet in the lap of Congress.
It’s a capitol capital idea, indeed.
The porn producing pair are asking D.C. for a $5 billion bailout for their shrinking business.
And you thought you heard everything.
Don’t kid yourself, this is very important and raises the stakes in an industry that if it fails to perform could bankrupt Los Angeles.
For decades porn production has beefed up L.A.’s economy and has mightily enhanced the city’s coffers.
If the porn industry goes down, the San Fernando Valley, a bedroom community of greater L.A., will indeed be stripped of fertile revenue.
Long known as the Porn Capitol of the World, the Valley is dotted with high performance locations where the producers of such movies shoot wads of filmy reels for vicarious viewing pleasure.
Like the house down the street and around the corner from my house.
I kid you not!
Being home all day, my neighbor Deb -- no, not the one who did Dallas -- and I kept our prying eagle eyes on the doings at the infamous two-story, five bedroom, three bath, swimming pooled house.
Feigning being "students" who were making documentaries, they got away with it for quite a while before the house was put up for sale and its occupants shrunk away in the night.
Finding their cover story hard to swallow, they couldn’t fool Deb and me.
I mean really, how many "student" film makers have limos parked out front, erect a fake house front, cover the windows with sheets and have a parade of beauties and hunks coming and going day and night?
The local councilman and police knew what they were up to, but we were told their hands were momentarily tied, they didn’t have a legal beef against the owners of the house, and they couldn’t doing anything about it.
Not that we wanted them to do anything about it.
We were having too much fun making jokes, and it gave us something really interesting to gossip about, besides the cantankerous, nosey Nellie witch (no offense, witches) who lives down the street.
I’m sure you have one like her. She leaves neighbors notes and phone messages about which trees need pruning, crabbing about crab grass, complaining about tots‘ trikes left in driveways, and ranting about workmen who arrive to work at what she thinks is too early or hammer during her afternoon nap.
Besides, considering how well porn jobs pay, we were desperately trying to figure out how we could become house mothers to the "girls" or official greeters.
Flynt and Francis insist that they are not kidding, although it sounds like a big fat stand-up joke. They said their industry is sagging and in desperate need of a stimulus package.
They see no difference between bailing out Wall Street or bailing out Sleaze Street.
I hope they’re not kidding, because L.A.’s economy is flagging and it, too, needs and injection of Viagraleconic stimulation.
Perhaps if they appeal to President-elect Barack Obama’s newly appointed Chief Performance Officer Nancy Killefer it will help, because we can’t afford to be stripped of further revenue.
Source: http://www.dailynews.com/...
Source: http://www.dailynews.com/...