Since Friday, it seems like nonstop exhilaration.
First, a unanimous Supreme Court ruling from eminently reasonable Iowa telling the fundamentalists,"Your arguments are bigoted and transparent." I tingled.
Then came the Vermont rollercoaster. Some of you may be aware that I have a very, very special affection for Vermont. If my husband weren't so, uh, averse to the cold, Vermont would be a slam-dunk in every other way. (I'm willing to trade a warm winter for nice, warm civil rights.)
First, the Vermont Senate did us proud with an overwhelming passage of the marriage equality bill. Then, we bit our nails as we watched the House debate: would there be a veto-proof majority? The answer was like a torpedo to the heart: no. Honestly...the idea of losing the Vermont battle by five or fewer votes had me near tears.
Then, Governor Douglas vetoed the bill. We said very nasty things about Governor Douglas. They weren't even respectful.
And then this morning, I sat down in my training course (at least I wasn't at the office) and feared for the worst. Remember, we got married in California -- we'd gotten used to losing. And at just past nine, the news: VERMONT WIN!
I sat in the back of training and cried. No one noticed (I can do it quietly, really, I can). I texted everyone I could think of (especially friends who are Vermonters) and silently thanked everything that is for those Subaru-driving, crazy-independent, New-England-pragmatist Vermonters, who made a boy in Texas tremble with joy at the mere thought that 123 folks in Vermont who had a little political sway think he's just another human being. Thank you, Vermont.
Beyond this love letter, there are a whole lot of unresolved goings-on. Next on the docket? New Hampshire's Senate has a bill to look at (the New Hampshire House shocked me by passing a marriage equality bill not long ago), and Maine starts considering marriage equality April 24th. Please -- if you're from one of those two states, or intimately involved with them, please, please, please help us. My understanding is that, as usual, we can't just depend on Democrats. I have read that Govs. Lynch (NH) and Baldacci (ME), both Democrats, both OPPOSE marriage equality.
Vermont was a tripartisan effort. Members of the Progressive, Democratic, and Republican parties ALL voted for marriage equality. I'm not saying Republicans across the nation are about to turn tail on this issue, but in New England, it would seem that the more reasonable breed of Republican -- what I think of as the Ford Republicans -- has started to turn from the right wing to the right thing. Democrats, for their part, have been guilty of inertia on this issue across the nation. As the tide turns and they can no longer hold gay people over a barrel for votes, they may lose what has been a small, but reliable and sometimes lucrative constituency because of their failure of courage. Perhaps Jon Huntsman, Republican governor of Utah, is an early herald of that change. It's hard to imagine a governor of Utah (UTAH?!) supporting legal recognition for GLBT couples, but he does.
It's time to turn our attention to New Hampshire and Maine, and push for those states to do the right thing, and not just push Democrats. They are not the only receptive legislators and governors on the issue, and limiting our conversations only closes off avenues for learning and change.
Beyond the near horizon, New Jersey, Rhode Island, and New York should be the next round. New Jersey had the choice a couple of years ago between marriage equality and civil unions. The legislature chose civil unions and simultaneously set up a panel to study the effect of that legislation. The panel has concluded that civil union status is not equal, and invites, rather than resolves, discrimination. New Jersey has legislative and gubernatorial elections this year. New Jerseyans: where is your state representation on this issue? Please make your views heard and help us put New Jersey on the map as yet another reasonable, sane free state where equality isn't an empty promise. Your current governor has made it clear that if marriage equality legislation crosses his desk, he'll sign it. My understanding is that the only thing keeping that from happening is electile dysfunction. Equality: help New Jersey get it up.
We'll have to see what happens in elections in Rhode Island and New York in '10. The current RI governor is a wingnut on ths issue, sadly, and Providence's popular mayor, David Cicilline, has unfortunately chosen not to explore a run for governor. He's gay...it seems like that might be a help on the equality issue. I have no hope of marriage equality coming into play in New York before the next round of elections: please, those of you in those states, make your voices heard. Please help us. Every ally matters. Vermont is proof.
Beyond that, the mist hazes over the next ones on the list. In spite of Nate's very interesting analysis of marriage amendment battles and all the talk of tipping points, we are very, very early on yet in securing safety, security, and recognition for GLBT people and their families. I'd love to be wrong, but I think we're a ways off from an equality tidal wave sweeping this nation. The fundamentalist haters have done everything they can to scorch the earth they leave behind to slow progress.
Thirty states have constitutional amendments enshrining discrimination against GLBT people. One of those is that pesky state of California. Remember them? In spite of all this excitement, my husband and I remain in legal limbo. He pointed out just yesterday..."Remember, a year ago? We were waiting for California. Now, here we are...waiting for California." For all the talk of Iowa and Vermont swaying Supreme Court justices, the argument before them was quite narrow, and I suspect they'll uphold Proposition 8. They may even strike my very dearly-held marriage, and if they do, you can bet your boots Connecticut's going to see us married on the green of my old hometown. I'll marry him again anywhere they'll let me. Better yet, just let them try and stop us.
And, lest we all forget, there is the yet-to-be-waged federal battle. It very quietly began recently with challenges to the Defense of Marriage Act in the courts. Our darling little District of Columbia is even playing the game from a different angle, beginning with legislation, unanimously approved today (!!!), to recognize marriages performed elsewhere. They're planning a push for full marriage equality down the road, but remember: they must contend with Congress. And, bless them, they may do more to push this conversation for us in the federal mind than anyone else might just have the access to do.
Again, thank you, Iowa and thank you, Vermont. Two new free states in a week -- I would never have expected it. And New Hampshire, Maine, New York, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Washington, Oregon, and yes, California -- we have our eyes on you. Consider yourselves on notice. We are in love with one another, and committed to equality -- and this marriage you will not stop.