Crossposted from Street Prophets
Last September I wrote about my sister Diane Oviatt's participation in an historic series of meetings — convened by the Oakland California Stake [i.e., Diocese] of the Mormon Church — on the subject of "Better Loving Our Gay Brothers and Sisters."
I don't know if they read Street Prophets or not :-) but a week or two ago the Salt Lake Tribune got hold of the story of those meetings, and a Tribune reporter (Peggy Fletcher Stack, who's done great work covering LGBT issues for the paper), called Diane to interview her for an upcoming article.
Ms. Stack's piece, Gay rights: Oakland LDS Stake tries to heal post-Prop 8 rifts, was published on the Salt Lake Tribune's front page last Thursday.
In it she tells of how the enthusiastic participation of LDS Californians in the Prop 8 campaign...
...left other Bay Area Mormons, particularly those with gay friends and relatives, feeling embattled and alienated. Some stepped away temporarily from church; others left for good. Those who remained often felt at odds with fellow believers.
Ms. Stack goes on to describe "the anguished stories several Mormons shared during emotional church services Oakland LDS Stake held last summer" to foster a better, more compassionate understanding of Mormon LGBTs and their families by letting them tell their own stories.
One of those Mormons, as I said above, was my sister Diane, who gave a heartfelt and moving speech to her congregation (the full text of her remarks is included in my previous diary, linked at the top of this post).
Diane told the Tribune what happened in her church after she told of what it was like to be Mormon and have a gay son:
The response in Oviatt's suburban Moraga, Calif., ward was electric, Oviatt says. "Everyone in the audience was weeping. Men came up to my husband, crying, and hugged him, saying, 'We love you and we love your son.' "
A couple of the more ardent ballot supporters apologized to Oviatt for having Prop 8 signs on their lawns, saying, "We never knew."
The article also shares the story of a few other East Bay Mormons, giving a well-rounded picture of a variety of responses to Prop 8 and the larger question of LGBTs in the LDS Church. In this diary I've focused on my sister because, well, she's my sister, and her story is the one that I have explicit permission to tell. But the rest of the piece is worth reading.
Diane believes, as I do, that the best way to counter fear, ignorance and prejudice is to let people see that LGBTs are real people with families, hopes, dreams, and hearts that can break. She is walking the walk.
The Tribune piece ends with this quote, from Diane's speech last fall:
"I assured [Ross] of our love and understanding, our unwavering support and loyalty, but when, in absolute despair, he said, 'What's the point of going on? I can't ever marry in the temple and have a family. How do I get to the celestial kingdom? What happens to me?' I had no answers. I still don't.
"I could not advise him to keep coming to church, to hope for peace in the next life. There are graveyards full of young Latter-day Saints who have tried.
"I choose life for my child. I would rather have him alive, living an authentic life, true to who he is, than to live a stalwart steadfast lie that backs him into a suicidal corner."
Diane Oviatt
I'm prouder of my sister and my nephew than I can find words to describe. By coming out so publicly, they, along with the other courageous people featured in the Tribune article, are helping to break down barriers of fear and ignorance. And I am grateful to Peggy Fletcher Stack and the Salt Lake Tribune for making these stories available to their Utah audience. (Salt Lake City itself may be fairly progressive, but the Tribune is widely read throughout Utah, in places which need more exposure to stories like this.)
Diane tells me that there are plans for a movie about the Oakland Stake's experience, which will allow these stories to reach a much wider audience.