Let me begin by saying that I'm an Ambassador...a kind of diplomat, from both "Red State" and the red states. As such, I come with full Ambassadorial privileges. That means, among other things, I am not to be harmed in any way and enjoy diplomatic immunity. In practical terms, that means, no HR's. I'll follow the rules of this site, so that should not be a problem, but any HR's will not only be a violation of this sites TOS (as I intend to follow the rules), but also a violation of the rules of diplomacy that grant me safe harbour in foreign lands.
For those who question this, one glance at my avatar will demonstrate my diplomatic immunity and credentials.
Now, as to the reason I'm here. It's simple, and I'll use a term progressives seem to love: Educate. (as your teacherken would say, consider this a "teachable moment").
I'm here to educate you. On conservative principles, policies, and convictions. Because, let's face it...you're woefully ignorant all. I represent the hardworking, intellectual, erudite and cerebral backbone of red state politics. I'm not here to engage in your petty political infighting that will surely be the undoing of the progressive movement (that is for others...see below). Rather, my job is to prepare you for the coming conservative tide. And offer safe harbor to those who wish to join us. Part of this mission means "educating" you. Correcting the deep misunderstanding you have regarding the philosophy that the majority of Americans call their own.
So, to that end, I asking you to joiN me in embracing President Obama's clarion call for civility. I'm here to engAge in reasoned, nuanced debate on public policy. Unfortunately, I've already had to respond, Rather forcefully, to those who have HR'd me in violation of the flag of truce I come under. To those people, I offer pardon and forgiveness to those who asK, as they had not yet been educated as to my credentials and purpose here. From this time on, however, I expect my immunity to be honored.
Finally, I have a bit of revelation for you: There are multiple agents of Red State here at Daily Kos. All all trusted users, some are popular diarists...and one is even a front pager. Their job is to sow discontent and spread disinformation. To get you fighting amongst yourselves (admittedly not difficult). It generally takes the form of criticizing the President "from the left" (usually on health care or national security)...then sitting back a and watching the fireworks. To prove the veracity of what I'm saying, next week I'll reveal the name of one prominent agent.
In addition to our own covert operatives, we have what we call "Friends of Red State" on here. These are democrats who joined Daily Kos years ago as genuine progressives, but have since become "disillusioned" with your agenda and now assist us in keeping you, shall we say, "distracted".
I tell you this not to alarm you, but to underscore the dire need for our "Two Americas" to exchange official representatives.
And so, dear friends (and I do so hope we can be friends), you'll see me here in the coming weeks and months engaging you, pushing you, testing you and challenging your assumptions. Not via "right wing talking points", but rather through the forceful expRession of conviction born of conscience. Think of me as Socrates proverbial gadfly.
NOTE: To those who have already emailed me wishing to defect, I'll be getting back to you at my earliest inconvenience. In the meantime, keep your head down and try to avoid the meta diaries.
UPDATE: As leader of this site, Markos (and ONLY Markos) is, of course, free to expel any Ambassador at any time, including me. In such an eventuality, I will respectfully honour his decree, and see you herald nevermore.
UPDATE II: I find the accusations of perfidy to be most ungracious and unwelcome. Do you treat all guests thus? Please stop with, and remove, the HR's. The are in violation of international convention, the TOS of this site, and the civility the President calls us to. Moreover, if I am expelled (i.e. banned), you'll never know who our agents are here, and you won't be able to send your own Ambassador henceforth (see below) In any event, we have dozens of accounts here waiting to be used, so expelling me would accomplish nothing.
UPDATE, DIPLOMATIC POUCH EDITION:
Due to overwhelming demand, the decision has been made to extend an offer for Daily Kos to send a "Blue" (or Orange, if you will) State Ambassador. Your job will be to go to Red State, as I have come here, and represent the "progressive" viewpoint. Of course, you'll be afforded full Ambassadorial and Diplomatic Privileges. And despite repeated violations of the banner of truce I come under by citizens here (in the form of HR's), I can assure that you you'll be treated with all due respect at Red State (and in the red states). Such a Post is a coveted one, particularly in these trying economic times the President has put us in, so the job will only go the most qualified of nutroots activists. If you wish to be considered, please post your qualifications and credentials in the comments section of this diary, or PM me directly.
Because intelligence and cunning are essential to this important position, top consideration will be given to those who can successfully guess who some of our Red State Operatives and "Friends" are here.
We are also looking for someone to fill our "Vegetable Justice" chair.
Women, minorities, members of the GLBT community and gravitationally challenged (i.e. corpulent) individuals are encouraged to apply. This diplomatic post is offered without regard to race, color, religion, sex, age, national origin, marital status, disability (including having a propensity for progressive propaganda), BMI or sexual orientation.