(Daniel Acker/Reuters)
Today is Iowa Straw Poll day, a magical day that combines the sunburn-and-bad-food carnival atmosphere of a state fair with the oh-my-God-please-make-it-stop dullness of a political convention. No Tilt-a-Whirl for you, kids, but here's a double helping of Thad McCotter. And here's some short snippets of some songs you young folks have never heard of but which, trust me on this, are
very meaningful and/or ironic.
The speeches are now over: we didn't learn much new. We learned from her movie that Michele Bachmann apparently has 500,000 individual pictures of her family scattered around her home, and her entire presidential bid is merely justification for showing us every single one, set to music. We learned from Tim Pawlenty that he is dull. We learned from Thad McCotter that Tim Pawlenty is a powerhouse of public speaking, because Thad McCotter could bore the paint off a barn. He's the only person I know who can make even insane conspiracy theories sound dull: tapes of his speeches should be recorded and sold as sleep aids. Seriously: I would buy that.
Herman Cain is serving Godfather's Pizza at his tent. Really, Herman Cain? What a cheapskate!
Michele Bachman's tent has air conditioning. Her slogan: if you're going to be red-faced, be red-faced because of your fervent political beliefs, and not just because it's hot outside.
Here's a thread to discuss the fun and offer up your predictions. I believe the actual results are expected at some point after 6 PM ET, 3 PM PT.