My sleep patterns have been off and late last night I did a diary composed of humorous videos titled I'm Bored. When one of the commenters produced a scathing review I shut off the computer and fell into the self depreciation rabbit hole. That is when I realized I'm depressed.
I don't have the spiral of self destructive thought processes like that unless there is something wrong with my system. And in looking at the following list I see that more than likely depression is the source of many of my issues today:
According to the National Institute of Mental Health, symptoms of depression may include the following:
difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions
fatigue and decreased energy
feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and/or helplessness
feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
irritability, restlessness
loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex
overeating or appetite loss
persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment
persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings
thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts
Why am I like this? Well according to the Mayo Clinic there can be many causes but they have yet to find a specific formula as to what really causes it.
It's not known exactly what causes depression. As with many mental illnesses, it appears a variety of factors may be involved. These include:
Well I'm am different in a lot of ways so my brain may be different too:
Biological differences. People with depression appear to have physical changes in their brains. The significance of these changes is still uncertain but may eventually help pinpoint causes.
I have seizures so I know my neurological system is out of whack:
Neurotransmitters. These naturally occurring brain chemicals linked to mood are thought to play a direct role in depression.
This may be a problem with me as far as I do have imbalances:
Hormones. Changes in the body's balance of hormones may be involved in causing or triggering depression. Hormone changes can result from thyroid problems, menopause and a number of other conditions
.
Definitely yes:
Inherited traits. Depression is more common in people whose biological family members also have the condition. Researchers are trying to find genes that may be involved in causing depression.
I get the fixed income monthly financial roller coaster ride. And after mid month it definitely is in a low spot:
Life events. Events such as the death or loss of a loved one, financial problems and high stress can trigger depression in some people.
And I have more than enough of this to go around:
Early childhood trauma. Traumatic events during childhood, such as abuse or loss of a parent, may cause permanent changes in the brain that make you more susceptible to depression.
As for a cure I just tried looking up that answer the same way I did when I collected the previous information. There was nothing that was peer reviewed meaning there is no cure. Yes they can try meds, most of which I have negative reactions to or are not effective. And therapies which I find pointless. I just have to understand that sometimes this is how my brain works and just deal with it.