I had no ideas teabaggers actually went to this site and read things here! I thought the very sight of DailyKos would cause their eye sockets to bleed. Well my teabagger friends, it looks like you had some choice words for my little ditty on your persecution complex. Your comments and reactions have done the one thing you may not have intended them to do: prove me right. To show you my appreciation, I'll take some more time to delve into this wondrous phenomenon.
I know, the big, bad, evil atheist liberal (literally) is guilty of the crime of painting with broad strokes, without thinking too deeply about you as a group. Perhaps I have some "deep seated misunderstandings" about your beliefs? I feel your pain. I know you most likely can't reciprocate, so I'll leave you to imagine what empathy must feel like. No, I understand you are a diverse group of people...that I find completely terrifying, but each in your own, unique, way. To me, you're like "Baskin Robbins 51 flavors of insanity," where each flavor offers its own adventure in dementia.
See, your persecution complex runs deep. It boils down into this: everything is a conspiracy. No, I don't think you are uneducated. In fact, many teabaggers I've seen can be quite eloquent. Education doesn't inoculate you from wild flights of insanity; in fact it can amplify them. There are so many examples to list, from thinking that the University of Michigan is selling secrets to China, to believing climate scientists from around the world have conspired to concoct a crisis of earth shattering proportions out of whole cloth just to get money, to America's favorite: birthers...who take guns to local government to make citizen's arrest and have very, VERY awkward interviews with Anderson Cooper on CNN. Muslims are coming in by the boatload, universities are brainwashing our children, and my personal favorite: "liberals want to lower our standard of living with green energy so that we can live with the dinosaurs." The tin foil hat saga goes on and on!
Again, you are a diverse group from many walks of life. You are united by many things, like the constitution (...save for the parts you don't like) and liberty (...from the brown people). There are the evangelicals who long for the destruction of the non believers in your apocalyptic second coming, whose date you can never seem to get right. Finally, all those people who just wouldn't believe in the talking snake like you will get their just desserts and burn in "compassionate conservative" hell! You hate welfare of any kind (except the kind you use and conveniently forget about), but talk about yourself as a loving, charitable Christian, that donates your money so the pastor can buy himself new snakeskin shoes and a bowling alley instead of a soup kitchen. The atheist liberals and their Muslim foot soldiers (Talk about your strange alliances!) conspire against you to persecute you and force you into allowing same-sex marriage, talking about condoms, and that unspeakable thing you do when the kids are asleep. Lord knows that if gay marriage is allowed, you'll finally feel free to leave your wife and kids of 10 years for that guy you've been eying all this time.
Then there are the rugged individualist types who enjoy the Glenn Beck. I admire Glenn Beck in the same way I admire dog psychologists and people who make $39,000 backpacks. They are living proof of the adage: "A fool and his money." Yes, Glenn Beck suckered you into buying gold and food insurance to save you from when the welfare Negros finally go berserk and overrun your suburbs! Here's food for thought: If someone says that your money will be worthless because of the collapse of your government, and that the only thing that will be worth anything is gold, then why would they trade you the gold they already possess, for something that they just told you is going to be totally worthless in the near future? Don't worry, if that makes your head hurt, just think of George Soros and his ACORN squad coming through your door, and everything will be alright again.
There are of course the old school racists. Wait, what was that? You're tired of being called racist by the lamestream media? No one said you were all racist. There's absolutely no evidence of that...except for the guy who put up the "Obama Fried Chicken" sign, and the lady with Obama's face on a monkey, and the pimp photo, and the email with Obama eating a banana...the entirety of birtherism, the video of the guy saying Black women have six babies, White supremacist tea bagger Pat Buchanan being replaced by a clone from the 1830's saying slavery was awesome...No, no evidence whatsoever.
Then, there are the actual libertarians (who don't follow Ron Paul for some odd reason) who started this movement off and now realize that the Koch Bros. and Karl Rove would never let you have all of the fun. The very people you worship and admire for their embodiment of the joys of selfishness...have taken your organization and warped it towards their own selfish and destructive ends. Surprise!
So yes teabaggers, I realize you are a diverse group of conspiracy driven authoritarian nut jobs, each with your own background that ranges from the certifiable to the insane, with a small minority of people who just can't understand why life isn't perfect for everyone else. You live in a world designed to destroy you, and you are the unwitting heroes from small town America, ala Matt Damon's vision of Sarah Palin in a Disney movie. Your persecution complex runs deep, as your list of imaginary enemies is long.