Mark Twain (Sam Clemens): river boat pilot, journalist, essayist, short story writer, novelist, public speaker, world traveler, devoted husband and father,
~~ POOTIE LOVER ~~
Boy and man, Twain lived with numerous cats and often spoke and wrote about them. "Some people scorn a cat and think it not an essential; but the Clemens tribe are not of these." "When a man loves cats, I am his friend and comrade, without further introduction." There's a
Twain site, indexed so you can find out what he said about dogs, camels, elephants, bats, donkeys, birds, horses, not to mention government, religion, and so on. It’s clear that Twain really loved and respected animals. He was, bless him, an outspoken opponent of vivisection.
I would like to credit him as a precursor to LOLspeak because he commented on the horrendous grammar cats use and said he didn't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. We need to let that one go because he mocked the Simplified Spelling vogue of his day that is in fact how we spell in LOLland:
To see our letters put together in ways to which we are not accustomed offends the eye, and also takes the EXPRESSION out of the words.
La on, Makduf, and damd be he hoo furst krys hold, enuf!
It doesn't thrill you as it used to do. The simplifications have sucked the thrill all out of it.
I am convinced that Twain would admire what we ourselves have done with PBW-speak and would be with us today if he were still alive. Now a romp through a few of his infinite zingers as seen through the eyes of our furry friends.
Owr Grownd Roolz
The PWB diaries are a place to relax, share pictures and stories about our animal friends, LOL, and build community. If you like that, come on in and join us; if you don't like it, now's the time to click over to something else. No crapping in the playground, please.
That's the way with a cat, you know -- any cat; they don't give a damn for discipline. And they can't help it, they're made so. But it ain't really insubordination, when you come to look at it right and fair -- it's a word that don't apply to a cat.
Cats are loose in their morals, but not consciously so. Man, in his descent from the cat, has brought the cat's looseness with him but has left the unconsciousness behind (the saving grace which excuses the cat). The cat is innocent, man is not.
If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man
but deteriorate the cat.
One of [the kittens] likes to be crammed into a corner-pocket of the billiard table -- which he fits as snugly as does a finger in a glove and then he watches the game (and obstructs it) by the hour, and spoils many a shot by putting out his paw and changing the direction of a passing ball.
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something
he can learn in no other way.
Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.
The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.
It was a long, low dog, with very short, strange legs--legs that curved inboard, something like parentheses turned the wrong way....I thought the plan poor, and structurally weak, on account of the distance between the forward supports and those abaft... it seemed to me that it would have been a stronger and more practicable dog if it had had some more legs.
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit,
you would stay out and your dog would go in.
The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.
We have the best government that money can buy.
You want to be very careful about lying; otherwise
you are nearly sure to get caught.
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightning that does all the work.
Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
I would like to thank the ICHC website for the majority of these photos.
Coded by BirderWitch
Word clouds by ccmask