A first diary has been a-brewing in my brain for the past few months. I wasn’t sure what it would be - something about #Occupy, or something about climate change, or something about one of the GOP candidates’ invasions of visits to my fair state of Iowa - but now that it’s finally hatched, it’s time to release it to the world to share with you, dear readers. I trust you won’t start throwing tomatoes….
Over the last week or so, we’ve been treated to some #OccuCarols, for example, here, here, and here, celebrating the rapacious banksters and their servile politician tools who have done so much to upend our lives and undermine us all.
Now I would like to expand the genre a bit to recognize the self-sanctified culture warriors who strive to sow discord and distraction among us, setting us at each other’s throats while the banksters party on at our expense.
This song is dedicated to those curmudgeonly crabapples we have all come to know and love, the loyal foot soldiers of the Christianoid leaders who seek to wield Christmas as yet another weapon with which to split, slash, and shear.
Should the title need any clarification, the “War on Christmas” is what we Satan-worshipping baby eaters are supposedly waging against all truth and decency. The “War on the War on Christmas,” in turn, is their allegedly well-meaning but utterly misleading crusade to set things right once and for all, so help them God.
Without further adieu, I present to you…
The War on the War on Christmas
(sung to the tune of “A Holly Jolly Christmas”)
It’s the war on the war on Christmas
It’s the worst time of the year
I just know they’ll pitch the snow
And drain away the cheer.
It’s the war on the war on Christmas
So when you walk down the street
Say “Merry Christmas – or be damned!”
Chide everyone you meet.
Oh ho
The Christian-o
All up in your face
Somebody waits for you
To put you in your place.
It’s the war on the war on Christmas
And in case you didn’t hear
Please by golly
End the war on the war
on Christmas this year!
(This song is a revised version of a comment I posted here, on Walter Brasch’s diary, “One Jew’s Christmas.” If you missed his diary yesterday, I encourage you to read it.)