Jon Stewart had a great segment last night hitting the GOP over the debate over the Blunt amendment, and how they're lying when it says it's not about birth control.
But it's no wonder Mitt Romney was confused. The interviewer asked Romney about birth control, and as the Republican Senators debating the amendment yesterday made clear, the Blunt amendment has nothing to do with birth control.
2/29/2012:
SEN. KELLY AYOTTE, R-NH: Many have tried to characterize this amendment as denying women access to contraception. That's a red herring.
SEN. ROY BLUNT, R-MO: The word "contraception"'s not in there, because it's not about a specific procedure.
SEN. MIKE JOHANNS, R-NE: They want to somehow shroud this and veil it as a women's health issue. ... It's certainly not about contraceptives.
"It is about the whores who use contraceptives. And dancing, it's about dancing. It always begins with the dancing. And the facepaint! And culottes, always culottes! Oh, garment of temptation! You are the Devil's pantaloon!"
Buddy, you want to present some evidence this isn't about contraception?
SEN. MIKE JOHANNS, R-NE (2/29/2012): Well, I went on the Internet and I would ask unanimous consent to put into the record an open letter to the President that is being signed by women all over this country.
Oooh, open letter from the Internets. If open letters from the Internet worked, half our audience would be underneath a redwood smoking legal weed with Mumia right now. (wild audience applause) Actually... did I say half? I meant 98%.
Actually, by entering this letter into the record, that Senator avoids having to actually read that letter out loud, which means you actually have to go to the Congressional record to find out that this not-about-contraception letter states:
... government contraceptive programs inevitably change the sex, dating and marriage markets in ways that lead to more empty sex...
And I'm pretty sure they meant that in a negative way.
Videos and transcript below the fold.
See, it all boils down to this issue of a health insurance mandate that requires employers to provide plans that cover contraception as part of women's preventative health care. Some religious groups that also hire the unfortunately-named laity have said that this violates their principles.
Thus, yesterday and today, the United States Senate debated a measure that would only require employers to provide health care coverage "consistent with their religious beliefs and moral convictions". It's called the Blunt amendment, after how high you have to be to think you're going to pass this fucking thing! What are you thinking??
Also, I should mention, the sponsor of the bill is Missouri Republican Roy Blunt, so that also may have been... that may have also played a role in the naming.
How serious is this issue right now? Damn thing's a week old, and Mitt Romney's already taken two positions on it! And, he took the two positions within 3 1/2 hours of each other.
2/29/2012:
OHIO NEWS NETWORK: Blunt-Rubio is being debated, I believe, later this week that deals with banning or allowing employers to ban providing female contraception. ... Have you taken a position on that?
MITT ROMNEY: I'm not for the bill. ... Contraception is working just fine. Let's just leave it alone.
THREE AND A HALF HOURS LATER
MITT ROMNEY: Of course I support the Blunt Amendment. I thought he was talking about some state law that prevented people from getting contraception. So I talked about contraceptives and so forth. I really misunderstood the question.
That is... I got... Dear Oxford English Dictionary, I submit to you a new measure of time: the romney. It's defined as the 3 1/2-hour window in which a grown man running for President can change his deeply held conviction to its opposite. Let me use it in a sentence for you. "Oh my God, we've been in this fucking car for 2 1/2 romneys now! I need to pee! No I don't."
But it's no wonder Mitt Romney was confused. The interviewer asked Romney about birth control, and as the Republican Senators debating the amendment yesterday made clear, the Blunt amendment has nothing to do with birth control.
2/29/2012:
SEN. KELLY AYOTTE, R-NH: Many have tried to characterize this amendment as denying women access to contraception. That's a red herring.
SEN. ROY BLUNT, R-MO: The word "contraception"'s not in there, because it's not about a specific procedure.
SEN. MIKE JOHANNS, R-NE: They want to somehow shroud this and veil it as a women's health issue. ... It's certainly not about contraceptives.
"It is about the whores who use contraceptives. And dancing, it's about dancing. It always begins with the dancing. And the facepaint! And culottes, always culottes! Oh, garment of temptation! You are the Devil's pantaloon!"
Buddy, you want to present some evidence this isn't about contraception?
SEN. MIKE JOHANNS, R-NE (2/29/2012): Well, I went on the Internet and I would ask unanimous consent to put into the record an open letter to the President that is being signed by women all over this country.
Oooh, open letter from the Internets. If open letters from the Internet worked, half our audience would be underneath a redwood smoking legal weed with Mumia right now. (wild audience applause) Actually... did I say half? I meant 98%.
Actually, by entering this letter into the record, that Senator avoids having to actually read that letter out loud, which means you actually have to go to the Congressional record to find out that this not-about-contraception letter states:
... government contraceptive programs inevitably change the sex, dating and marriage markets in ways that lead to more empty sex...
And I'm pretty sure they meant that in a negative way.
So we're heard it's really not about contraception, it's really about liberty. And if it's about liberty, there's only one group that hasn't weighed in. Gentlemen, to the Founding Fathers-mobile!
SEN. ROY BLUNT, R-MO (2/29/2012): We should not let a government interfere in these basic rights of conscience, a term of Thomas Jefferson when he wrote the New London Methodist in 1809.
Ah, so on the Blunt amendment, Founding Father Thomas Jefferson votes Yay from beyond the grave.
Jon then
re-enacted how Thomas Jefferson would've reacted to this debate over the pill.
He then roundly mocked
Barbara Boxer for her retelling of his joke about the Blunt amendment.
He then
needled Iran over their proclamation that their Oscar win was somehow a victory over Israel by pointing out all the Jews that had won previously.
Meanwhile, Stephen profiled the Florida teacher who's facing voter fraud charges for simply registering her students to vote.
Stephen then looked at the history of
"Yo Mama" jokes.
Jon interviewed Notre Dame law and theology professor Cathleen Kaveny, and Stephen interviewed Claire Danes, which was supposed to take place last week, but was the show Stephen had to cancel.
As for Wednesday's show, Jon had a fun time mocking CNN for their coverage of Tuesday's primary results, and tried to contain himself when Rick Santorum's speech was filled with references to... well, santorum. John Oliver then showed how Bill O'Reilly's non-verbal punditry can be used as a model for future political discussions.
Meanwhile, Stephen looked at
Obama's plan to eliminate the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy, and how the GOP is crying class warfare over it.
He also had a
countdown clock to when the GOP is forced to accept Mitt Romney as their nominee, which
made him more desperate by last night's show.
Jon talked with
Masha Gessen, while Stephen talked with
William Shatner.