(Alert: This post contains material that might appear to be snark-like to those who lack an appreciation of the subtleties of Mitt Romney's capacity for non-linear, quantum truth, and ability to transport between alternative imaginary realities.)
(Hydrant) - Presidential candidate Mitt Romney's campaign released a clarification to what has become known as the Romney Paradox - the simultaneous assertion that he both did, and did not, have an ongoing relationship with the "Bain entity" after February of 1999, despite his signature on SEC filings, and sworn testimony under oath in June 2002, that he was its founder, sole stockholder, CEO, president, and received executive compensation "over $100,000" during the controversial period.
"I did not have a non-linear relationship with that corporation, the Bain entity," says Mitt Romney, in frustration. "And, even if I had, which I didn't, I would not have inhaled," as Romney sought to dispel any remaining public confusion. "It depends on the what the definition of truth is."
According to an anonymous, highly placed advisor to the Romney campaign, "many who are having difficulty understanding the Romney Paradox and Romney's unique relationship to quantum truthiness might gain insight from both, science fiction, and the story of Schrödinger cat, used to explain a similar paradox of perception in quantum mechanics.
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Gale Collins of the New York Times notes, provides some background on the science fiction angle.
Romney gave five network television interviews on the subject on Friday. While it was true that a bunch of Securities and Exchange Commission filings submitted into the new millennium described Romney as Bain Capital’s boss, that was a technicality, he told CNN.
Well, actually, he said, “I was the owner of an entity that is filing that information.” Also that there’s a difference between an owner and “a person who’s running an entity.”
It was Romney’s Star Trek moment. They were always talking about entities on Star Trek, and entities were very seldom good news.
While seldom good news for the characters, the appearance of alien "entities" on Star Trek, usually opens the doors to parallel quantum dimensions, that many skeptical Democrats have not yet considered as a possible explanation for Romney's apparently contradictory statements.
This confidential source, also raised the possibility that a Schrödinger cat quantum physics metaphor might help "liberals" understand how Mitt Romney can provide two simultaneous accounts, either of which could be perceived as true, or false, depending on when, and why they are being evaluated.
Schrödinger described the thought experiment of the story of a cat who remains simultaneously 50% alive, and 50% dead, in two superimposed states of quantum reality until someone opens the box, to find only one state where the cat is either dead or alive.
From Wikipedia,
Schrödinger describes how one could, in principle, transpose the superposition of an atom to large-scale systems. He proposed a scenario with a cat in a sealed box, wherein the cat's life or death depended on the state of a subatomic particle. According to Schrödinger, the Copenhagen interpretation implies that the cat remains both alive and dead (to the universe outside the box) until the box is opened.
In exactly the same way, this anonymous Romney campaign advisor explained to me,
the fact that Romney has signed SEC documents, and sworn under oath that between 1999 and 2002 he was still founder, CEO, Chairmen of the Board, received more than $100,000 of executive compensation, signed the six major financial deals during the time period,, and handled the press announcements for the departures of two former partners, either shows that he had "nothing at all to do with the Bain entity," or, "proves his continuous residency, and ongoing engagement, for the purposes of establishing the Massachusetts the requirement to run for Governor," depending of the needs of the perceiver at the moment.
"If President Obama is trying to tie Mitt Romney to the devastating consequences of former employees, and pensioners caused by Bain's predatory reorganizations, Mitt had nothing to do with it. If, on the other hand, Romney needs to establish residence in Massachusetts to qualify to run for Governor, then he was highly active. What Democrats, and especially liberals don't appreciate about Romney's mind, and that of many Republicans is that he, and they, can transport back and forth between these two alternative imaginary realities instantaneously without any twinge of cognitive dissonance."
So those who do not understand quantum physics can only imagine how unique Mitt Romney's non-linear mind is with regard to its relationship to truth, and alternative imaginary realities. People just need to "let Mitt be Mitt," and trust him to tell us which imaginary realities he wants to invoke in any particular moment.
And, we can not even imagine how extraordinary the future could be if we were to elect a President who has such a fluid and flexible sense of truth and reality, as does Mitt Romney.