Put your complaints to song, and instead of saying shut the hell up, people will applaud and call you a deep thinker.
Can we all just agree words have many meanings and let it go? By the way, wouldn't literal baby showers be the worst thing ever?
Gentrification is destroying the unique characteristics of all the charming old neighborhoods where you can score good street drugs.
If there isn't a massage parlor out there called "All you need is rub," people are stupid.
I'm starting to get a little sick of the form letters the Guinness Book sends me every time I notify them of a record I set.
Cats scare me. One minute they’re brilliantly manipulating you into feeding them extra, the next minute they’re fucking mesmerized by a box.
I can’t believe you typed that word. I’m so offended. At least have the decency to replace a letter with an asterisk. Magical asterisks.
The below bit by Louis CK is comedy at its best.