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Q: Do you like Kipling?

A: I don't know. I've never been kippled.

Cracks me up every time.

Mr. Kipling kind of came to grips with the Empire's racism in his poem "Gunga Din".

Kind of.

Below is my, ala Kipling, offering to another Deen.

My apologies to Rudyard.

WARNING: Inappropriate language

You may talk of okra and lard
When you are safe inside your yard
And your friends are comfortable with your way of talkin’
Your colloquial Southern Charm
Was never meant to harm
Those thin skinned darkies who would like to see ya walkin’

Now, your use of the word nigger
Was never meant to trigger bad feelings,
It was only for the love of things long past
Like slaves in livery and a rope in every tree
Where you could hang ‘em if you didn’t like their sass.

Deen, Deen, Deen , where the mischief  have you been?
Stuck on the plantation?
Mourning your defeated Southern Nation?
You pasty faced old racist, Paula Deen.

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