Person of Color: Male
When a white person approaches you should lie down [but not too quickly] with arms and legs spreadeagled, you should however make sure your limbs are not to close to the white person. You should apologize profusely if shot just to be absolutely sure you have not caused offense. Carrying anything at all in your hands is strongly discouraged. When beaten or shot please don't bleed as this could be deemed as destruction of property.
Muslim Americans
You should be ready to apologize profusely at all times for any crime anywhere committed by suspected Muslims. Please ensure you apologies are up to date, never make any comparison to what we do to keep Americans safe, because that is all about "freedoms".
Native Americans
Never complain about derogatory references to skin, culture or loss of land and rights. It's America now, home of the free and the quite timid when anything worries us unnecessarily, then freedom can also go hang.
Women: White
Be proud of your man and stop complaining.
Women: All
Don't drink, wear modest clothing otherwise it was you that caused the problem.
Tourists
Learn certain key words such as "freeze" and don't approach private residences. Please read the previous points because these rules also apply to you. Enjoy your stay.
LGBT: Any
Be sure not to be near any weather events or natural disasters, accept that you will lead to the downfall of the greatest country on earth for your choice in marrying the love of your life.