In case you haven't heard, the GOP won big on Tuesday. We have responded by wailing, gnashing of teeth and rending our garments. All appropriate responses. Some have moved on to speculating what the GOP will do with all that power. Continue to obstruct? Work in a reasonable fashion to pass legislation on which there is common ground? Or pass every extreme bit of fantasy they have ever dreamed of? There is strong evidence of the latter in Mississippi.
On Wednesday AM, this little gem popped up in the Jackson Clarion-Ledger: Ballot Petition Aims to Protect Confederate Heritage.
A Mississippi heritage group has launched a proposed ballot measure which would amend the state's constitution to recognize Christianity as the official religion of the state and English as the official language of the state.
The 12-part measure would also establish "Confederate Heritage Month," which would provide a curriculum base for school children to learn about "Mississippi's Confederate history, heritage, achievements, and prominent people," the initiative reads.
The article understates the byzantine nature of the petition. Read on.
The full petition can be found here.
Just to whet your appetite, here is the first of the twelve provisions:
(I.) The State of Mississippi hereby acknowledges the fact of her identity as a principally Christian and quintessentially Southern state, in terms of the majority of her population, character, culture, history, and heritage, from 1817 to the present; accordingly, the Holy Bible is acknowledged as a foremost source of her founding principles, inspiration, and virtues; and, accordingly, prayer is acknowledged as a respected, meaningful, and valuable custom of her citizens. The acknowledgments hereby secured shall not be construed to transgress either the national or the state Constitution’s Bill of Rights.
Do you love the conflation of Christian and Southern? If you do not live here, you may not have realized that they are the same. Trust me. They are.
The petition goes on to address:
II. English as the official language, "except for the option of Latin or French for jurisprudence, medicine, heraldry, and other traditional uses." I am relieved at the heraldry exception, aren't you?
III. "The state flag of Mississippi shall be the state flag adopted in 1894, which has been in continuous use since 1894, and which was confirmed by statewide vote in 2001." This requires a state flag be flown in all public buildings where there is a US flag and that it be the same size. Also if you do the Pledge of Allegiance, you have to do the State Flag salute: “I salute the flag of Mississippi and the sovereign state for which it stands with pride in her history and achievements and with confidence in her future under the guidance of Almighty God.”
IV. I'll just quote this one, to give it justice:
Mississippi’s official and sole state nickname shall be “The Magnolia State”. Mississippi’s official and sole state motto shall be “Virtute et Armis”; said state motto shall appear below the eagle on the state’s coat-of-arms. Mississippi’s official and sole state song shall be “Dixie”. Whenever the national anthem is played in a public venue or at a public event in Mississippi, either “Dixie” or “Go, Mississippi” shall be played immediately thereafter
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V. What has to be on car tags "in elegant font".
VI. - VIII.They want the Mississippi Constitution to dictate college mascots. They have included three items delineating in excruciating detail what the requirement should be.
A sample:
The official and sole mascot of the University of Mississippi shall be “Colonel Reb”, whose appearance shall be an accurate reflection of Colonel Reb’s definitive appearance on the cover of the 1947 University of Mississippi yearbook (the 1947 Ole Miss). University of Mississippi teams shall be the “Rebels”. The official and sole alternate title of the University of Mississippi shall be “Ole Miss”; no other alternate titles, abbreviations, or bynames of the University of Mississippi shall be used in any official capacity. The University of Mississippi traditions of playing “Dixie” and of displaying hand-held flags of any size, with or without flag sticks, at athletic events or in athletic venues shall not be infringed. The annual Ole Miss homecoming titles shall be “Colonel Reb” and “Miss Ole Miss”. One year after the Heritage Initiative’s passage, a life-sized, classical, and heroic statue of University Greys soldier Jeremiah Gage shall be erected on the edge of University Circle, positioned centrally in front of the Lyceum; said statue shall stand on a base five feet high with a metal plaque affixed listing the name, rank, and hometown of each University Greys soldier; the funding thereof shall be from non-public sources.
There is a separate item for Mississippi State mascot and for University of Southern Mississippi (my alma mater) which includes this choice bit: "The University of Southern Mississippi traditions of celebrating Mardi Gras and of prominently featuring a live horse named “Son of Dixie” shall not be infringed." Damn liberals.
IX. Sop to the "other universities", including the one where I teach, that we will never be consolidated. This is not to protect us; this is to keep the others untainted by our presence.
X. Happy Confederate Heritage Month
XI. Preserve the monuments.
Within Mississippi, all publicly owned, publicly held, or publicly managed Confederate or Confederate-themed items, including but not limited to monuments, statues, works of art, relics, markers, signs, names, titles, structures, roads, parks, graves, and cemeteries shall be preserved and maintained by the state government, which may delegate applicable duties to the respective counties or municipalities for this purpose; for all cases in which said items were renamed, the more historical name shall take precedence and be reestablished in full.
XII. I have no idea what this one is about.
The borders and boundaries of the State of Mississippi are hereby restored; the repealing of Article 2, Section 3, of the Mississippi Constitution, is hereby nullified; and said Article 2, Section 3, shall be reinstated and reactivated, in its entire pre-1990 wording. The jurisdiction and laws of the State of Mississippi, and the rights and liberties of her citizens, shall exist within her borders and boundaries.
In conclusion: as of Tuesday, the crazy has deepened. Courage!!