Lindsey Graham is so excited about running for President!
Senator Lindsey Graham who for some reason I always want to associate with Louisiana (as if having Bobby Jindal wasn’t sufficiently lamentable for that poor beleaguered state) is from South Carolina (and the fact that Stephen Colbert is also from SC just goes to prove that Nature really does strive for balance). His bestest friend in the bubble he knows as his world, is Senator John McCain who affectionately – and embarrassingly – refers to Lindsey as the one who "feels like my illegitimate son". Yes, well, ahem, moving on...
Because it defies belief that Lindsey Graham would gaze into the bathroom mirror one morning and hit on the idea of running for president, one can only conclude that John McCain, a former nominee and failed candidate (forever remembered and unforgiven for unleashing the scourge of Sarah Palin on the nation) talked his erstwhile friend into it. Now Lindsey is positively bubbling with the idea!
How close is he to making an official declaration? There’s a 91% chance he will run for president in 2016 – not 90% or 99% but a very precise 91%. You have to take seriously a presidential wannabe who has worked it out to within 9%. Frankly, my dear, I was surprised the figure wasn't 91.47%. But then it probably was and those wretched msm reporters rounded it down for stenographical ease. You can't trust them; you really can't.
Lindsey Graham made his momentous 91% announcement on Fox News Sunday in mid April. He promised to make his 100% announcement in May. Oh my, that is this month! How flutteringly excited he must be!
He also vouchsafed that the remaining 9% was contingent on his being able to raise the money needed for a run of this magnitude. For the sheer entertainment value, one can only hope he succeeds and the 100% announcement is forthcoming in the next two weeks.
Already he is in full swing. He may have missed all the fuss and fun of Steve King's Iowa party, but he was at New Hampshire with the A-listers to kick off his pre-campaign campaign in style. This was important! This was BIG! Thus it was that he was among the nineteen ("nearly twenty" according to Huff Post, proving again media's discomfort with uneven numbers) prospects on the program for a weekend conference hosted by the state GOP. It was the year's first gathering of its kind in the first-in-the-nation primary state and everyone exclusively selected by God to be President was there.
From Huff Post’s report:
[F]ormer Florida Gov. Jeb Bush delivered a standing-room-only speech while lesser-known South Carolina Sen. Lindsay Graham introduced himself to voters one at a time in the hallway.
Way to go, Lindsey! Not for him the glare of multiple spotlights, blaring introductory music, a hyperbolic introduction, and crowded auditorium. No! He’s choosing the personal touch. Well, it's working for Hillary. And he did get his name in
Huff Post and
Salon (
second paragraph, second sentence).
Now we wait with bated breath for the 100% announcement. Will it be next week? Will it be the week after? Will it be at all? He's certainly thinking a lot about it as we see in this interview with Chris Wallace:
When the senator said there was a 91 percent chance he would run, Wallace asked, "Seriously?"
"Yeah, I think so," Graham replied. "I've got to put the means together. I think I've got a good message. I think I've been more right than wrong on foreign policy. I've criticized the president for leading from behind, for being weak and indecisive. I've been a problem solver in Washington, and I think I've got something to offer the party and the nation."
I counted four
thinks in four lines which is well above average thinking for Republicans. Though the uncharitable might say that
“Yeah, I think so,” isn't what most people would consider to be strong and decisive, it could be argued that it's 91% decisive... close enough for now.
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