What do you do when you feel yourself shutting down in resistance? Most likely anyone who has had any kind of serious practice for a period of time, be it meditation or perhaps a Hatha Yoga practice, becomes sensitized to the physical contraction that results in the body when we encounter resistance in ourselves.
Resistance, and the negative emotions that cause us to feel resistance, come from a part of us that is completely dedicated to maintaining the status quo. If we think about it every one of the causes of resistance all have within them the seed of separation. When we are angry we need to blame some other thing or person. Or perhaps we shut down in intolerance of the friction of contrast when we hear someone offer an opinion opposing ours. Our envy separates us from the one who has the thing we want. The minute we contract, if we are paying attention, we can notice the separation between the proverbial myself and other in the story in our mind.
Good evening and welcome to Monday Group Meditation. We will be sitting from 7:30 to 11:00 PM Eastern Time. It is not necessary to sit for the entire extended time, which is set up to make it convenient for people in four North American Time Zones; sit for as long as you like and when it is most convenient for you. Monday Group Meditation is open to everyone, believers and non-believers, who are interested in gathering in silence. If you are new to meditation and would like to try it for yourself, Mindful Nature gave a good description of one way to meditate in an earlier diary, copied and pasted below:
"It is a matter of focusing attention mostly. In many traditions, the idea is to sit and focus on the rising and falling of the breath. Not controlling it, but sitting in a relaxed fashion and merely observing experiences of breathing, sounds, etc. Be aware of your thoughts, but don't engage in them. When your mind wanders (it will, often), then return to focus on breath and repeat."
Sangha Co-hosts for meditation are:
7:30 - 10:00 Ooooh and davehouck
9:30 - 11:00 thanatokephaloides
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In other posts the suggestion has been offered to notice resistance when it happens, and if you are not ready to release it, simply accept that in yourself. That is one good way to work with resistance, without pushing back at it, simply letting it be.
But there is another way; what if we really looked at our resistance as it happens? We can notice the resistance actually causes physical pain. We can feel it in our bodies, in the clenching of the solar plexus, in the tightness in the chest, or the churning in the gut.
So now we know that resistance arises from a part of us that is determined to maintain the resistance and our sense of isolation and separation. And we can feel the pain of resistance in our bodies. Perhaps that gives us a little push, we realize the futility of resistance and become motivated to work more actively with our resistance.
Now when resistance arises we can pay attention, when we feel the contraction we can simply stop and notice the story that is happening in our minds. Notice how the story is intended to isolate us and set us apart. We can begin to realize it isn’t actually something “out there” causing our suffering, but the story taking place in our minds that is actually causing the suffering, and we have a choice. We can continue to let the story run uninterrupted, or we can simply let the story go. It isn’t the situation out there, but the story in here that is causing the suffering. Just let the story collapse.
This isn’t an easy practice, it requires awareness and desire to truly be free. But once we recognize the hopelessness of resistance, it is easier to develop the desire to be free of it, and we are motivated to really watch ourselves. Once started, we need to be aware that the part of us determined to keep things as they are will start turning up the heat, as it is fearful of our progress. This is a practice for the long haul, it never really ends, and in the beginning we will have to really be on our toes. But after steady practice the ego driven mind will relax, there will be less and less resistance and when it does arise it will become possible to simply notice it and think, “Oh, yes, you again…I’m not biting the hook..not today, thank you.” :-)