Let’s face it: since the election of Donald Trump has felt like some demonic, supernatural phenomenon straight out of a horror movie, it may be time for us to forgo convention to do what we can to get rid of him. To that end, our friends in the witch community are heeding the call and preparing to cast a mass spell against the current liar-in-chief.
A document making its rounds among the witch community is asking people who practice the craft to perform a monthly binding ritual until the president is removed from office.
In order to work, the mass spell must be performed at midnight EST on every waning crescent moon.
The first one is happening on Friday and will be followed by similar spell cast events on March 26, April 24 and May 23 and beyond.
It’s important to know that the spell is not a curse or a hex—nothing intended to cause Trump harm (too bad!)—but is instead a binding spell: something designed to restrain him or prevent him from doing something. And since we know that nearly every piece of legislation proposed from this White House will be pretty damn evil and intended to damage anyone who isn’t a rich, straight, white male, we not only need to thank the witches for trying to bind him—we probably should be joining them as well.
If you want to participate, the instructions have been made available on Facebook to the wider public. Here’s what you will need:
- Unflattering photo of Trump
- Tower tarot card
- Tiny stub of an orange candle or orange carrot
- A pin or small nail (to inscribe candle)
- White candle (any size), representing the element of Fire
- Small bowl of water, representing elemental Water
- Small bowl of salt, representing elemental Earth
- Feather (any), representing the element of Air
- Matches or lighter
- Ashtray or dish of sand
Most of these materials should be fairly easy to obtain (especially the unflattering photo of Trump). And, for those of us who are not witches, it’s not fully clear what the tiny stub of orange candle represents but feel free to let your imagination run wild. The best part of the spell, however, seems to be the end:
Practitioners are supposed to burn the photo with the orange candle, chanting “So mote it be.” But if that sounds a little too “witchy,” Hughes says a simple “You’re fired!” will also work. [...]
When the ceremony is over, [Michael M. Hughes, who writes about the paranormal] says it’s crucial to ground yourself by laughing loud and hearty since, “Trump hates people laughing at him.”
After a month of watching them try to ban Muslims, deport as many people as possible, roll back protections for transgender students, and collude with Russia, we need to get rid of Trump and company ASAP. And at this point, it’s worth taking every little bit of help we can get. So gather some tiny orange candles, your hearty laughter, and practice chanting “You’re fired!” as loud as you can.
Here’s some musical inspiration to get you started.