Chester Bennington the front singer for Linkin Park passed away yesterday of an apparent suicide. He’s also a fellow survivor of childhood sexual trauma. Chester’s death occurred a couple months after his close artist friend Chris Cornell also committed suicide. Chris would have been 53, Chester was 41.
If this diary triggers you, message me or call Lifeline.
I’m a survivor of childhood sexual trauma and neglect, severe bullying and family dysfunction. I have many needs stemming from those years and I’m learning about getting help for the needs. My brain is broken to speak of it in the simplest terms and the research of Janina Fisher Phd and Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D. are my focus at present. I have to find solutions to the tornado mess that impacts the mind I survive. There are 1 in 6 of males in this country and around the world that may be more, who have suffered some form of sexual trauma as a child, that statistic goes to 1 in 4 for U.S. women.
There is push back from the APA about where we fit in the labels of psychiatry. We are not given due process in how those in the highest levels of psychiatric power dole out consideration of our needs. We are still neglected!! I can deal with this later.
Chester was an awesome artist, and a father, as was Chris. Both leave sad families behind, and friends and fans. It is not easy to have the survivor mind and maintain life, the brain has wiring with many manifestations. It's complex and I'm still studying it. Study the Fight, Flight, Freeze, Submit and Attach parts to begin answering this complexity. It goes far deeper. Read "The Body Knows the Score" to get some in depth research of how a survivor is manifested.
We know Chester’s pain, and we know the mind storm which impacts the truths of how life plays out. There are many things that push to break and stop life.
There are answers too, I've written what I've been doing since my last diary. It drains a persons energy like a marathon must, I don't know, I've not run one. But, I recall long jogs. What I mean to convey with this diary is to show there are many impacted by Chester's apparent suicide, and survivors will need some support too.