Chapter 27: What I did on my vacation from you!
When the humans go away on vacation, what do they do? They bring in an Auxiliary Human (AH) to fulfill contractual obligations.
RULES OF ENGAGEMENT —
- You know how this works, but as always, a gentle reminder:
- Pooties are cats; Woozles are dogs. Goggies are dogs, too, and moggies are cats. Birds...are birds! Peeps are people. PWB Peeps are Pooties, Woozle, Birds People. Neat, huh.
- No trolling the diary.
- If you hate pootie diaries, leave now. No harm, no foul.
- Share any and all pootie/woozle photos or issues that you would like .
- If you have health/behavior issues with your pootie or woozle, feel free to bring it to the community. We just may have someone whose experience can help.
- Whatever happens in the outer blog STAYS in the outer blog. This is a place to relax and play; please treat it accordingly.
- There are some pics we never post: snakes, spiders, creepy crawlies, any and all photos that depict or encourage human cruelty toward animals. These are considered “out of bounds” and will not be tolerated.
- There is no such thing as stealing a photo around here, but if you would like a pic from the comment threads, please ask the poster. He/she may have a copyright to those pics. Many thanks!
- It should not need to be said, but ANY/ALL photos that imply or encourage human violence against an animal will be considered verboten! Whether it is “comedic” or not.
When you went on vacation, you left us with an Auxiliary Human?
Auxiliary Human should have basic skills on how to get Cheezburger!
One has to connect up with the airwaves to vet the skills on a specific Auxiliary Human.
The Gossip Ring is very chatty and messages are sent over air and water all the time.
Sometimes we just have to roll with whatever is in the wave.
Sometimes Auxiliary Human has good skills and can be retrained.
You should always be honest with the Auxiliary Human, and declare your authority early.
Make sure that the Auxiliary Human continues to be obsequious and friendly.
Make sure that the Auxiliary Human knows their place and does everything to your specification!
One should always try to modify strange behaviors when one sees it.
This is a good time to find out what else is on offer in the neighborhood.
It’s a good time to put on a neighborhood play, and use all your dramatic skills.
Sometimes it’s good to scare the Auxiliary Human by hiding in plain sight.
Sometimes, it’s good to sit with spiritual friends and have deep thoughts.
Make known to the Auxiliary Human, that you are the Guardian of the Fridge.
Be sure to give the Auxiliary Human long silent looks….
That’s it! Train that Auxiliary Human!
hAaH! Pavlovian Arts in Schrodinger's House!