As a child I never attended a large athletic event, and in the 1970s they rarely showed the playing of the national anthem during televised games. I don’t think I knew it was a thing until my sister took my to a Wisconsin Badger football game when I was in sixth or seventh grade. When the national anthem played during that game about half the crowd stood, while the other half could not be bothered to stand.
In high school, we stood in the stands, but we were still talking, laughing, and doing just about anything other than looking at the flag or paying attention to the anthem. When I joined the Army I stood and saluted during the national anthem. If caught outside during retreat or colors, I would stand and salute. I never thought about why I was doing it. I just did it.
About a year after getting out of the Army I went to a Badger hockey game. The National Anthem played, and I stood, hand on my heart facing the flag, at the position of attention, mostly from muscle memory from the Army.
As time went on I started to wonder why the national anthem was played before a game. I did not see the connection between the two. At my son’s youth football games, we never played the anthem before game time. When he got to high school the anthem was not played prior to freshman or junior varsity games. My son has participated in sports since kindergarten, but the first time I ever heard the anthem played prior to an event was when he became a varsity wrestler. The JV wrestlers would have their matches, the anthem would be played, and then the varsity meets would start. Were the other games/meets not important enough for the anthem?
When Colin Kaepernick started kneeling during the anthem I started to examine why I stood during the anthem.
After this introspection I realized I stood for the anthem not as a sign of respect for the flag, or for the soldiers who fought under it. I stand for the anthem out of a love for country. I do it not because society dictates I should, and not because it is expected. I stand only because I want to. No one forces me to stand.
When you stand for the national anthem on your own, it is patriotism. When you are forced to stand, it becomes nationalism.
I would rather be in a stadium where only half the people are standing because they want to than in a stadium full of people standing because they are forced to. If someone decides not to stand during the national anthem, I will be right there defending that choice. The rights granted us by the First Amendment are far more important than standing for the national anthem.