Hispanic Federation Fund for Puerto Rico Relief Link
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From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE
Gold Star Goes to…
Twenty days ago, immigrant-rights activist Ravi Ragbir was “disappeared” by ICE agents during a routine check-in. They arrested him and were going to keep him separated from his family by iron bars until his deportation. Judge Katherine Forrest of the Southern District of New York, who laments that our immigration laws are a confusing “corn maze,” had a little something to say about that before releasing Ragbir so he could have time to prepare for an “orderly departure.”
“There is, and ought to be in this great country, the freedom to say goodbye. That is, the freedom to hug one’s spouse and children, the freedom to organize the myriad of human affairs that collect over time. It ought not to be---and it has never before been---that those who have lived without incident in this country for years are subjected to treatment we associate with regimes we revile as unjust, regimes where those who have lived in a country may be taken without notice from streets, home, and work. And sent away.
We are not that country; and woe be the day that we become that country under a fiction that laws allow it.
We have a law higher than any that may be so interpreted---and that is our Constitution. The wisdom of our Founders is evident in the document that demands and requires more; before the deprivation of liberty there is due process; and an aversion to acts that are unnecessarily cruel. These fundamental rights are at issue in this case.”
More like this, please, judges in the Age of Trump! Thx.
Read Judge Forrest’s full ruling here. Oh, almost forgot: Obama appointee.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, January 31, 2018
Note: Would the owner of the 69-ton M1 Abrams battle tank that just crushed 16 of our customers’ vehicles in the parking lot before smashing through our front door please come to the lingerie department? Your lights are on. Thank you.
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By the Numbers:
Days ‘til spring: 48
Days 'til California Western Monarch Day at the Pismo Beach Monarch Butterfly Grove: 3
Estimated number of people who have been hospitalized with the flu so far this season: 12,000
Number of flu-related deaths in Maine so far: 22
Percent of Republicans surveyed by WaPost-ABC News who believed in October and last week, respectively, that sexual harassment was a “serious problem” in the workplace: 42%, 59%
Cost of First Lady Melania Trump’s private flights between New York and Washington, D.C. during just the first six months of 2017: $675,000
Cost of Michelle Obama’s travel budget for all eight years: $2.8 million
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 186 (including 4 Marks of the Beast and 1 outcast demon CNN reporter). Soul Protection Factor 8 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: kiddie pool mania…
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JEERS to shameless showboats. Knowing full well they didn’t have the 60 votes needed to overcome a filibuster, Republicans in the Senate forged ahead anyway his week and got everybody on the record regarding abortion. Because if they ever stop throwing bones to their base, they’ll be the ones who end up on the primary dinner plate:
The U.S. Senate voted Monday on legislation that would ban abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy and would threaten doctors with up to five years in jail.
The bill, passed by the House of Representatives in October, fell short by a vote of 51 to 46 in the Senate. Only three women in the entire Senate---Deb Fischer (R-Neb.), Shelley Moore Capito (R-W.Va.)and Joni Ernst (R-Iowa)---voted for it, while Republican Sens. Susan Collins(R-Maine) and Lisa Murkowski (R-Alaska) voted against it.
The vote would’ve been a more lopsided 52 to 45, but newly-sworn-in Democrat Doug Jones is the junior senator from Alabama instead of right-wing Jesus freak Roy Moore, and Jones voted that sucker down seven ways to Sunday. In case you’re wondering, the abortion bill was authored by Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC), a lifelong bachelor whose last intimate encounter with a female involved sipping lemonade under a sycamore tree with Lou Ann Wiggleshauser in 9th grade, a moment cut short when the local high school quarterback walked by in cutoffs and drove them both to distraction. They might as well have turned the job of writing that women’s health bill over to a priest.
JEERS to much ado about nothing. His pants didn’t fall around his ankles and he maintained a pulse during it, but otherwise President Trump’s first State of the Union speech was basically a great big…um…oh, what’s the word? Shucks, it’s not coming to me, so here are some dogs to sum up the dotard’s ramblefest:
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I was impressed, though, that he made it through a whole hour and a half (third longest SOTU ever) without calling any country a shithole, cheating on his wife, or pausing to send a derogatory tweet. I figure he must’ve been chewing that special gum that reduces one’s cravings to act like a mean, narcissistic jerk in public: Dickorette.
CHEERS to premature departures. A wholly-unqualified child senior staffer resigned from the Trump administration last week. Today is Taylor Weyeneth’s final day as deputy chief of staff at the Office of National Drug Control Policy.
Weyeneth had nearly no previous experience after he graduated college in May 2016, aside from working for Donald Trump’s presidential campaign and transition.
Questions quickly arose about his qualifications after multiple discrepancies popped up on several of his résumés and reports surfaced that another job he held at a New York law firm in 2015 ended after Weyeneth failed to show up for work.
News of his departure comes just a week after 10 Democratic senators expressed their displeasure with Weyeneth’s appointment.
According to historians, he’s the first government official ever to resign from office so he could spend more time watching his pubic hairs come in.
CHEERS to safety nets. 78 years ago today, the first Social Security check (#00-000-001) was issued to Ida May Fuller---a Vermonter and childhood classmate of Calvin Coolidge---for $22.54. Or, as the Republican leadership calls it, "$22.54 too much." Despite all the despicable fearmongering coming from the right that Social Security is "flat broke," Senator Jeff Merkley (D-OR) reminds us via email….
Here’s the truth: Social Security is fully solvent, and will be through 2038. So why all the bluster? It’s a giveaway to Wall Street, plain and simple. Starting with Ida May Fuller in 1940, our nation has a proud history of rewarding a lifetime of hard work with the promise of financial security in one’s golden years. It’s been the most effective anti-poverty program in the history of the world.
Much obliged, FDR.
CHEERS to the great uniter. On this date in 1928, Scotch tape was marketed for the first time by 3-M. It holds things together like a charm. But to shut up Sean Hannity only duct tape will do.
JEERS to Clarabelle the Clueless. The senior senator from my glorious home state is befuddled again, which is always a bad thing because confusion releases a ton of methane from her head holes. She just can’t---I say, by golly, can’t---understand why President Stable Genius won’t implement the new Russian sanctions that Congress passed by, like, the most overwhelmingest margin in history:
Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine) on Tuesday said it’s “perplexing” that the Trump administration opted to not implement additional sanctions on Russia for meddling in the 2016 presidential election.
"The one thing we know for sure already is the Russians did attempt to meddle in our election. And not only should there be a price to pay in terms of sanctions, but also we need to put safeguards in place right now for the elections for this year,” Collins.
After making the statement, she pushed the door marked “Pull” so she could go back to her office and continue her never-ending struggle to open a mayonnaise jar by twisting the lid to the right.
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Ten years ago in C&J: January 31, 2008
JEERS to catapulting the propaganda. Shame on you, The New York Times, Shaaaaame on you. In their dissection of the State of the Union address, they lament what a divided country we are. And then they use the perfect example. If by perfect you mean perfectly wrong:
The nation is splintered over the war in Iraq, cleaved by ruthless partisan politics, bubbling with economic fear and mired in debate over virtually all of the issues Mr. Bush faced in 2002. And the best Mr. Bush could offer was a call to individual empowerment---a noble idea, but in Mr. Bush’s hands just another excuse to abdicate government responsibility.
No, the nation is not "splintered over the war in Iraq." The overwhelming majority believe it wasn't worth doing, and the overwhelming majority want to get the hell out. Iraq may be the one issue that unites us most. Please try to do better, Times. I imagine its embarrassing getting your clock cleaned by a blogger with underwear on his head.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to C&J Life Lesson #461. Republicans like to run around saying that we should never look back and instead only look forward. Here’s shocking proof that shows why they’re, as usual, wrong:
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Oy. That’s gonna leave a mark.
Have a happy humpday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Tom Hanks to Play Bill in Portland Maine in Biopic 'You Are My Kiddie Pool Friend'
---Hollywood Reporter
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