It’s been a long time since I was on the calendar to host Top Comments on September 11. There was that diary in 2013, but as I was filling in an unexpected gap in the schedule, I didn’t write something topical. I was on the schedule both in 2011 and 2012, and once we raise a glass to those whose lives were forever changed by the horrible events of 9/11 and its aftermath, I’d like to revisit those as well as consider a theme I encountered repeatedly today among some of my social media friends…
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Back in 2011, the Top Comments writers decided to publish a collaborative diary, with several people writing reflections on 9/11. Excerpted here is my contribution, but I urge you please to visit the diary to consider in full how much has, or has not, changed in eight years:
I was in the shower when news of the first plane broke, I turned the TV on moments before the second hit, and immediately called Mr. Brillig. He was watching and listening too with everyone at work. He left work early - I think everyone did that day - and went to pick up K1, who was 3 and in preschool. Her daycare was in a building that housed a public transportation hub, and in the panic of that day, we decided she needed to be home with us. Ten years later, I'm left with a story, a memory, and jumbled emotions.
The Story: When Mr. Brillig entered the daycare room to get K1, he found her standing in the center of the room with a handful of her hair in her hands. "We were playing haircut!" She and her bff V got their hands on a pair of scissors, and decided to give each other haircuts. We saved that hair, and tell the story very year, as a remembrance of the only part of the day that made us smile.
The Memory: Late in the afternoon, we simply had to tear ourselves away from the coverage, and eat. We walked the half mile to a local sub/sandwich shop. I remember how eerily quiet it was without the constant air traffic overhead. The other thing I remember from that trip to dinner was how polite everyone was to each other. No fighting for parking spots. No taking-your-life-in-your-hands trying to cross the street. No trash talk from one table of teens to another. No, we were all stuck in a moment when Do Unto Others, or perhaps the more colloquial Don't Be A Dick, was the Law of the Land. I miss that one little piece of the collective response to tragedy, the basic human kindnesses of the day. We went back all too quickly to dog-eat-dog, I believe as a result of the example our then-President gave.
The Emotions: Last month I attended a memorial service for my Mother, at which we were reminded by her former priest about the upcoming 9/11 anniversary. < sigh > Post-9/11 I was made to feel selfish for grieving her. "So many people died, don't you want to attend a service for them?" I didn't know anyone personally who died that day.. I didn't get to finish mourning her death on my own time scale, because I was supposed to mourn thousands of others. While I'd never minimize their lives, or the impact of each loss on those who were left behind... isn't that what I was expected to do?
Finally, I'm left wondering what might have been, if our country had been led by a different, more capable President. One who didn't think with the heavy hand of avenging his Daddy's experience, but who set out to bring to justice the men who planned and supported this terrorist act. Who might we be as individuals, as a nation? What would my now 13 year old daughter know as her childhood.
One year later, framing my diary on the words of two friends from very different experiences (one fellow Kossack and dear friend cskendrick, the other a former NYPD officer who lost over a dozen colleagues in his unit when the Towers collapsed), I advocated for living our lives by the Golden Rules:
Uncommon valor was common virtue. Why can't we strive for that tomorrow?
I believe that looking at each another and seeing not Left or Right, not Christian or Jew or Muslim or Atheist, not Gay or Straight or Bi, not Black or White, not American or Foreign, but instead seeing Fellow Humans, Fellow Travelers on the Journey of Life, can be that common virtue.
Just for tomorrow, what if we all lived by the Golden Rules: Do Unto Others, and Don't Be A Dick. Sure there will be people who can't, won't. But when one more person decides to try, just for a day... the terrorists lose just a little bit more.
Which brings me to today, when multiple people from a variety of times in my life that I’m connected to by social media said variations of this general theme: So with the East Coast bracing for a hurricane, and people tearing each other apart over their differences, can’t we put the awful political bullshit down and just come together?
I’ve sat mulling over this plea all day, and what it comes down to for me are these somewhat disjointed thoughts:
- That “political bullshit” could decrease immediately if Republicans found an honorable spine and stopped enabling the madman currently working taking up space in the Oval Office. And then themselves legislated for the good of the country, not the good of rich white men.
- I’d LOVE to all come be in this together. Really. But that means we need to stop the systemic and individually racist, sexist, ablist, classist bullshit and treat ALL of our countryfolk equally. Oddly, the folks most calling for “stopping the political bullshit” are often but not always the ones who have problems doing just this.
- STILL, my enduring memories of 9/11 focus on the kindness people displayed… from taking total strangers stranded while planes were grounded into their homes to letting families with slowmoving preschoolers cross the street without glaring or whizzing by. I suspect for most people still drinking Republican koolaid fear, xenophobia and a desire for vengeance (not justice) is what they remember.
- How different could our world be today, if we hadn’t had to endure the post-9/11 aftermath under President Bush, and now the ExclamationPointer-in-Chief. What would life be like for my now 20yo daughter and 13yo son?
I don’t have answers, but I’m grateful to have all of you to share my questions and thoughts. What’s on your mind tonight? Please share in the comments after perusing the Top Comments, Mojo and Pictures from the past 24 hours.
Brillig's ObDisclaimer: The decision to publish each nomination lies with the evening's Diarist and/or Comment Formatter. My evenings at the helm, I try reeeeallllyy hard to publish everything without regard to content. I really do, even when I disagree personally with any given nomination. "TopCommentness" lies in the eyes of the nominator and of you, the reader - I leave the decision to you. I do not publish self-nominations (ie your own comments) and if I ruled the world, we'd all build community, supporting and uplifting instead of tearing our fellow Kossacks down.
Note: Please remember that comment inclusion in Top Comments does not constitute support or endorsement by diarist, formatter, Top Comments writers or DailyKos. Questions, complaints or comments? Contact brillig.
From blueoregon AND CaffeineInduced:
This comment by FiredUpInCA deserves to be a top comment for obvious reasons! Here in the eye of NC, where he tweeted they would be "here" for us, I replied, yeah, like you were for PR? Okay, we're officially fuc*ed! This comment says it all :)
From thurayya:
This comment by
sagesource struck me because it was so deftly expressed. (Ed. note: On
theirunderstanding of “Black Lives Matter.” Exceptional!)
From elfling:
In this comment, Lucy Montrose asks about how to develop a leadership style that can embrace uncertainty in an environment where certainty is valued. Excellent!
Highlighted by wanderinginsamsara:
Is this deeply thoughtful comment by Hannah on some of the ways the authoritarian impacts our current political world.
TOP MOJO
Top Mojo for yesterday, September 10th, 2018, first comments and tip jars excluded. Thank you mik for the mojo magic! For those of you interested in How Top Mojo Works, please see his diary on FAQing Top Mojo.
TOP PICTURES
Top Pictures for September 11th, 2018. Click any picture to be taken to the full comment or picture. Thank you jotter!