I’m still mad. And this is just me venting again.
All I wanted to do was live out my days. I know well how privileged I’ve been. And then these traitors show themselves. I was roused! I was fuming! By goodness, I am a professional! I saw AOC making herself known, and just the fact that we re-took a majority of the house was enough to give me hope. If THIS guy can be elected, and she can come out of nowhere, surely I can make a difference! After a lone-wolf, hermit-like, secret little life, I put my name in public and said, “come get me — I can fix everything.”
And then folks here, and on twitter (a platform I’d *never* wanted to participate on), chuckled knowingly. Welcome to the club friend, but we’ve been in this fight for a long time. You’re shouting at a room full of professionals, debaters, nit-pickers and all the rest. Let’s not even get into the trolls and bots and self-righteous know-it-alls. I know the internet … it wasn’t unexpected.
Resignation is setting in. I’m not going to suddenly say something that gets everyone’s attention. As much as I want to be, I’m not Cap ready to hurl a shield at Loki. And given the fact that traitorous criminals hold the highest offices in the land, that’s just crushing. I would have thought that with things so clearly NOT “politics as usual” that folks would be chomping to unite. But things have been going sour for a while, and that’s not how this all works.
I do wonder how things will develop. I wonder how the circus parade of acting officials making their way through congressional hearings will combine with salacious intrigue of Amazon vs Enquirer. I wonder how a wide field of contenders will shake out. I wonder what shenanigans will be pulled right before the next election, or in some lame-duck session before the next servant takes the helm. I wonder if we’ll make it that long. I wonder when and how the Mueller investigation will wrap up, and who’ll end up getting away with murder, and who’ll be left holding the bag.
What’s to be done, when leaders are beholden to no one beyond anonymous donors? When they’ve rigged their seat to be secure? When they’ve set it up so the only rules they follow are erased. There’s a real push for a new Constitutional Convention … I wonder what it’ll end up saying. I’m sure I won’t have any say in the matter, but will be subject to it, regardless. Like the native American First Nations, I will simply be a human standing on land where other people are willing to kill me.
Since I began my little ego trip, I’ve wondered which would come first … would I gain enough ground to be noticed? Who’d notice first … white supremacists, Russian spies, or the populace … maybe just some drunk bloke with a shiv and the wrong attitude. Make a difference or die trying, I said. But I have no special skills to speak of. No diplomatic experience, or criminal justice background. Just my exposure to the world through exploratory hacking and military networking. I don’t know a whole lot about much outside electronic communications, but I know a little about a LOT.
So what am I to do, dear reader? Enjoy our yorkie … stay informed and engaged … hope and pray that the traitors are brought to justice before the next holocaust. Get used to the feelings of panic and pressure and despair that wash over me in moments between activities. I’m learning. I’ll likely write more, continue work on honing my message, or try to convey my perspective on the digital landscape that’s become the lifeblood of global society. I’ve been a part of it. I’ll fly simulators and slay aliens and build rockets for Kerbals (computer game stuff) (#PCMR).
I’ve left more friends behind, too. Not everyone is ready to jump at the chance to save the world, if you can imagine it. Not everyone wants to talk about what’s to come, either.
During my first tour of duty, in Germany, I was into medieval history … and part of the SCA kingdom of Drachenwald. It strikes me how similar our current situation is to the peasants living under feudal lords … subject to their laws … and their whims.
I’m rambling now … time to wrap it up. I love you, dear reader. I swore an oath to uphold and defend the ideals set forth by the founding fathers, flawed as they were, as I understand them today. We should honor our oaths, our treaties, our alliances, and our populace. I remain ready to serve. For now I will wait, and hope.