The BIG BOLTON BOMBSHELL is the talk of the town this morning, and, of course, every last American is simply outraged that it’s now basically irrefutable that our pr*sident is a corrupt, venal maniac who bribes other countries with foreign aid in order to secure sleazy political favors.
Ha ha ha!
Oh, you naif. Of course that’s not how conservatives are reacting. They’re pissed about some leaker who’s clearly been disloyal to Dear Leader.
Take Fox & Friends for example.
BRIAN KILMEADE: The New York Times brought up the fact that they said that John Bolton has been distributing copies to any or all to anyone; they said we did not. They said The Times reporting there [that] says they shared the manuscript with others is false. They say they did it through the process and the process obviously is corrupt. So if John Bolton’s lawyers are telling the truth here and they just submitted it in and it’s leaked out, if that is indeed the case, more evidence that people within the administration are actually against the administration.
AINSLEY EARHARDT: Tsk
KILMEADE: And the other thing is, devastating timing, because this thing was on the fast track to closing out without witnesses on Friday. Only Mitt Romney pretty much saying, ‘I want to see witnesses,’ everybody else saying, ‘I’ve heard enough.’ And now this gives fuel to the Sen. Schumers of the world, the Adam Schiffs of the world, to say I need a witness, and he wants to testify.
And this:
Oh, yes. So dishonorable to save us all from a corrupt scoundrel who’s trying to shove his filthy little banana into our republic.
Face it, morons. You backed the wrong horse’s ass. It’s okay to admit you were wrong. Approach the light. It will be okay. You definitely need to make amends, but we’ll be waiting for you after that’s all over.
The jig is up. You’ve been worshiping a false god.
Shhh ...
Shhh ...
It’s okay.
Admitting it is the hardest part. It’s gonna be just fine.
Is Trump still chafing your arse cheeks? Then Dear F*cking Lunatic: 101 Obscenely Rude Letters to Donald Trump and its super-fun sequels Dear Pr*sident A**clown: 101 More Rude Letters to Donald Trump and Dear F*cking Moron: 101 More Letters to Donald Trump by Aldous J. Pennyfarthing are the pick-me-up you need! Reviewers have called these books “hysterically funny,” “cathartic,” and “laugh-out-loud” comic relief. And they’re way, way cheaper than therapy.