When you need or want a real president — but he’s not — you end up with an unpresident.
Understanding the Unpresident1
He is unamerican, unappealing, unbelievable, unbecoming, unconscionable, unconvincing, undependable, undeserving, uneducated, unevolved, unfriendly, unfaithful, ungracious, ungodly, unhelpful, unhinged, unindicted2, uninformed, unjust, unjustifiable, unkind, unknowledgeable, unlikable, unlawful, unmannerly, unmanly, unnatural, unnecessary, unorganized, unoccupied, unprepared, unprofessional unqualified, unquarantined2, unreasonable, unreliable, unsuitable, unsatisfactory, untethered, untruthful, unuseful, unusual, unviable, unverifiable, unworthy, unwatchable, unexplained3, unexpired2,3, unyanked2, unyoked2, unzipped4, and unzapped2.
1The pretentious orange faux peacock, that is tRump, merits an entire alphabet of un-ness, and then another, because one has never been enough for the grubby, grasping tiny hands of Donnie Two Scoops, the King of Graft and Emoluments. He is famous for doubling down, so this list is a double A to Z of his unprecedented un-ness.
2So Far (He’s also uncuffed, unjailed and unconstrained so far. This will change.)
3We have decided to spell ‘x’ as ‘ex’ because otherwise this whole thing wouldn’t work. Besides, Mark Twain once said:
4He is, by far, he most overexposed glaring, blaring idiot in the history of the country. Please, can someone make him zip it.
tRump doesn’t exist in a vacuum. His unwitting, unthinking, uninvolved followers are variously uncaring, unconcerned, uncomprehending, uncooperative, uncouth, uncharitable, uncivilized, uncritical, uncool, uncivil, and mostly unconscious. It would be better for all of us if they could un-’c’ themselves.
I had some extra bonus ‘un’s, left over. I despise wasted derision: undistinguished, unenlightened, unexplained, unexpurgated, unglued, unintelligent, unintelligible, unorderly, unready, unrighteous, unreal and unsustainable. I’m sure you all have a bunch that I missed.
We are all unfortunate that we have to listen to his unfounded, unending litany of untrue statements, unflattering comments, unearned self-congratulations, underhanded justifications, unmanly whining and unsafe medical advice. It’s all underpinned by his unctuous toadies’ undying efforts to underscore his underwhelming accomplishments and undo his screw ups.
Bonus Content
When asked to say something good about tRump, all I can come up with is that he’s old and will be dead soon.
Donald tRump is a joke — the kind that isn’t funny and goes on for far too long.
Up the Resistance!
Memaliciousness
Cut and paste department. This is the regularly scheduled plea for readers. I’ve only had to make two memes so far. You have it within your power to make me work. If you spread the word about Evening Shade and your spreadee announces themselves in the comments, you will become eligible to receive your very, very special noprize of a meme of your very own. All you have to do is jump up and get out there and start carnival barking, cajoling, proselytizing (or pimping, if you are of an irreligious bent). You could even pester and push. Procrastination is not an option — it’s a way of life.
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