I ask you to let your imagination fly for a while. You've just boarded a flight going to a destination of your dreams. If you have the inkling you can imagine you're sitting in business or first class. Might as well make the most of your imagination. The seat belt sign has just been turned off and you're cruising at 35,000 feet.
Since this is my diary you can't have everything your way. You happen to be sitting next to me. You reach for the SkyMall catalogue in your seat pocket in front of you. You notice that I'm looking through my copy. We strike up a conversation about one of the items for sale. We quickly realize that both of us think shopping while cruising at 35,000 feet in a flying gas tank is the absolute best activity one can partake in as a credit card carrying red blooded all American. We quickly begin an in depth shopping spree for the duration of the flight. For this segment of the flight we're taking a look at cats.
Thanks to fellow Kossack Crashing Vor I am able to share this wonderful music video with you as you shop. You've really got to listen to this - SkyMall Kitties.
Our feline friends require very little extra to provide them with a comfortable and fulfilled life. That does not stop a super-consumer from searching for and buying items to improve their plight in life. Your searching needs to go no further than SkyMall.
Most cat needs revolve around defecation functions. Long gone are the days of the old fashioned litter box when all a person contemplated doing was filling a cardboard box with some litter, scooping it out once a week and replacing the litter every 2 to 3 weeks. Now the wonders of capitalism and technology combine to offer the cat lover multiple options when confronting the problem of cat poop!
First problem on the agenda for solving is training your cat to use what you want them to poop and pee into. SkyMall's potty training kit including a step-by-step training video will "potty train your cat faster than most people can potty train their kids." Hell you might want to try it on the kids and see if it works with them!
Do you fret because of cat litter paws throughout the house. Now there is paws for celebration. With the Stikitty® Mat put an end to cat litter tracks. The Stikitty® Mat comes with 20 sticky layers lasting up to 6 months. Gook luck training all your cats to exit the box from the side with the mat!
The pot for potty litter box conceals your feline functions in an attractive planter. Plus if you turn the entrance toward the wall your guests will be puzzled by the litter odor emanating from a beautiful plant in the corner of the living room!
Another creative alternative is the Kitty Washroom disguised as a handsome looking bathroom cabinet. There is nothing more intimate and satisfying than pooping with your cat. Plus when guests try to figure out where you've put the extra toilet paper they will get a big surprise!
Just because you're too lazy to change the litter box is no reason to smell it! The Automatic Litter Box System uses an innovative conveyor to transport your cat's crap away into a container for easy disposal.
Better still, let the Litter Robot™ do it for you! This litter box automatically activates 7 minutes after your cat departs. Here's the scoop after you purchase this baby - no more scooping! Your cat and you deserve this 24 hour self-cleaning litter box. It's yours for the low price of just $359.99!
Finally, just to make sure your cat pees up a storm make sure they always have crisp, clean, filtered water to drink 24 hours a day. Plus the 5 separate water streams provide your multiple pet household with private streams for each to drink from. And if you're so inclined they'll be room for you to take a sip too!
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Super-consumerism is a major problem in the United States and increasingly in the rest of the world. The above post takes a humorous poke at this serious problem. Consumption is inescapable for survival. Capitalism is a great economic system capable of providing much in goods and services. Our Church reminds us that capitalism is a great system to produce anything that people can be convinced to buy. It is a terrible system to conserve. We can no longer produce and consume all that we want that capitalism can provide. It is not sustainable. As followers of the Church of the Holy Shitters we strive to practice Soft and Fluffy Consumerism. This means we look at things from a waste-end perspective before deciding to purchase any product. What we buy and how we spend our money matters! For more detailed discussion of this issue please go to Holy Shitters.
The Church of the Holy Shitters will post articles on our holy S.H.I.T. day ( So Happy It's Thursday)
Last week: 12/19/13 - Super-consumer Crap Accumulators
Next week: 1/2/14 - SkyMall Shopping - Dogs
Hoping to add some humor, provoke thought, spark debate, deepen understanding, and shed some light on the fecal side.
Remember: "If we really want to straighten out all this crap we really need to think about shit." ( Shitbit by Poop John the First of the Church of the Holy Shitters)
Church of the Holy Shitters
A secular environmental religion, scientifically based, with a focus on the psychology of it all. Our ego is the culprit when it comes to dealing with climate change. We cannot save the planet. We can only save ourselves. Our current egotistical self-perception makes that prospect a dubious one at best. Meekness, humility and a realization that our shit does stink, guides us on our path to true sustainable living and climate equilibrium.
Cross posted at http://holyshitters.com/