Do you remember the Saturday Night Live routine that Dana Carvey used to do as the pet store owner with a thing for chickens? He would never let anyone buy the chickens he had in his pet store, telling them that chickens make lousy house pets while petting them. That skit used to kill me! I have never been around chickens for any length of time and they did not inspire me to want to own them. Lil Zen, on the other hand, would love to have chickens and get eggs fresh in the morning. Of course, her "morning" would be most people's "almost lunch time".
![Itzl Alerting](http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2310/5713737626_1fa725a5fe_t.jpg)
As you can see by Itzl's concerned look, this group gives Kossacks a safe place to check in, a daily diary where we can let people know we are alive, doing OK, and not affected by such things as heat, blizzards, floods, wild fires, hurricanes, tornadoes, power outages, earthquakes, or other such things that could keep us off DKos. It also allows us to find other Kossacks nearby for in-person checks when other methods of communication fail - a buddy system. If you're not here, or anywhere else on DKos, and there are adverse conditions in your area (floods, heatwaves, hurricanes, earthquakes etc.), we and your buddy are going to check up on you. If you are going to be away from your computer for a day or a week, let us know here. We care!
IAN is a great group to join, and a good place to learn to write diaries. Drop one of us a Kosmail and ask to be added to the Itzl Alert Network anytime! We all share the publishing duties, and we welcome everyone who reads IAN to write diaries for the group! Every member is an editor, so anyone can take a turn when they have something to say, photos and music to share, a cause to promote or news!
We do have a diary schedule. But, when you are ready to write that diary, either post in thread or send FloridaSNMOM a Kosmail with the date. If you need someone to fill in, ditto. FloridaSNMOM is here on and off through the day usually from around 9:30 or 10 am eastern to around 11 pm eastern.
Monday:
BadKitties
Tuesday:
ejoanna
Wednesday:
Caedy
Thursday:
art ah zen
Friday:
FloridaSNMOM
Saturday:
Most Awesome Nana
Sunday:
loggersbrat
But her desire for chickens caused me to dream a story that I will relate below. If you have any use for it, can complete it, have suggestions for it, let me know. This part of it has been bouncing around in my head for years.
The setting:
An isolated ranch, far from the madding crowd. Choose the state, I like Montana, not knowing anything about it at all.
The cast of characters:
Two very private ladies, perhaps lovers but that is never clear to me.
Assorted good looking ranch hands, men and women.
The owner and wait people at a small private dining establishment.
The plot, as far as I get:
The ladies own a nice ranch, very isolated. They raise chickens and cattle. The cattle are slaughtered locally, and the meat prized for its tenderness and good taste. The eggs are sold exclusively to a small private restaurant, also quite isolated but with a substantial clientele.
The twist:
The ladies, owner, waitresses and the clients of the restaurant are vampires, as are THE CHICKENS! Vampire chickens just made me laugh. Why would I ever think of such a thing? How did they become vampires? (I think they became vampires in my mind because Lil Zen sleeps so late and she is the inspiration for this story.) I don't know but they drink the blood of the slaughtered cattle and lay eggs with blood red yolks. The eggs are good food for vampires and keep them from feasting on the local populace.
The ladies sleep all day, the good looking ranch hands watch over them and run the ranch, raising, slaughtering and marketing the beef, processing the blood for the chickens. The ladies are seen at night in their egg delivery van which says "Casey's Chicken Farm, where chickens sleep til noon", heading out to the restaurant which is only open from midnight til 5am.
This concludes my musings on this story. I never get any further than the picture of these 2 ladies, merrily cruising down the highway in their delivery truck with the bright chickens painted on it. I can see the ranch hands keeping any strangers from disturbing the day for the ladies, being kind to the cattle so that they are happy right up to the last moment. I see chickens inside a special coop that keeps the sun out as they sleep all day and their eggs have red tinged shells. The diner is run by a very suave vampire man with cute waitresses who like retro clothes, hair and make up. The menu is quite clever but only features egg dishes. They have a cook book called "Omelets to Die For".
Do you want to take this further? Can you? Do you have any suggestions? I will never be able to use this story anywhere, maybe it has no use but here it is. I have mused about it for a few years now. The floor is open.