Trust me on this. As a Crohn’s patient diagnosed in 2015 I’ve had more colonoscopies than Carter has liver pills.
So I know that they are no joke. Trust me, a colonoscopy is a much easier price to pay than ending up with colon cancer.
That said, since I have had so many and am going in on Monday for an emergency one, I have learned that you have to approach these things with humor.
So I thought I’d open a diary about colonoscopies, jokes, videos, etc… or at the very least stuff that is humorous about medical procedures in general.
So… here are some colonoscopy jokes:
These two guys are sat in their hospital beds having a little chat.
The first guy asks the second, "What are you in for?"
"Camera down the throat." the second guy replies.
"Oh, endoscopy?" the first guy asks.
The second guy says, "Yeah. Checking for stomach cancer. How about you?"
"Camera up the butt" the first guy says.
"Oh colonoscopy, checking for bowel cancer?" asks the second guy.
The first guy says, "No, my neighbor was sunbathing and my wife caught me taking a photo."
I had a colonoscopy recently and believe it or not getting the camera up there doesn't hurt as much as you might think.
It's the crew that's the killer...
Three guys are talking in a bar one day. They start talking about how their cars reflect their careers.
The first guy says, "I'm a pimp and so I drive a cheap Escort."
The second guy says, "I'm a herpetologist and so I drive a Dodge Viper."
The third guy says, "I'm a proctologist, and I drive a brown Probe."
A little old lady has an appointment with a proctologist.
The proctologist does the exam, and then discusses the results with her.
He ends by saying, "Do you have any questions for me, Mrs. Smith?"
The little old lady looks at him scoldingly and says "Yes. Does your mother know what you're doing?"