I have figured out I am a “rural host without an agency ” for a teen who is turning 19 this Monday Jan 14, who aged out of our local residential teen shelter. The reasons she is still here and not homeless is d/t thus far, not being a thief, relatively honest, not a rager and i have developed a lot of compassion, have time, but limited $$. Took her to food bank and now i am volunteering there, and bringing food home that would be going to the pigs, but still good. Like a birthday cake yesterday that was going to be thrown away. “Oh, can i have it for a teens birthday?!!!” and outdated milk being thrown away.
The help I need (i had “we need help” in the title when i originally wrote this) is support and assistance in any way feasible by experienced folk, including encouraging positive uplifting comments to this rebellious teen who is in need of independent living skills in the comment section, a trans counselor who would be willing to do video remote sessions, other hosts? for support. Financial assist from those with the ability to donate for glasses, cell phone and service, school books, a bike, food not at pantry. Both of us want her to move out, my desire is that she has the ability to keep herself with housing after leaving here-if i can hang in there that long- for more than 3-4 months, with a school grant that who knows when will come thru with the shutdown, that is not enough to get her through to the next terms grant allocation.
Hosts are screened (background check, 2- 3 interviews and references) and receive training and ongoing support, especially with boundary-setting, managing expectations, conflict mediation, and cultural competency. Youth are typically accountable to case managers, not hosts. Programs may create support groups among hosts. • Positive Youth Development: Case management and services are individualized and focus on problem-solving, skill-building, communication, and goal-setting. Setbacks and mistakes are tolerated. Youth participate voluntarily and are never “placed” in a home. The matching process should be driven by the youth with support from the case manager. • Flexible Model: Host homes are effective in urban, suburban, and rural settings. Host homes may be used as short-term emergency shelter allowing youth to remain in their community, as respite care combined with family engagement services or as transitional housing. This model may work especially for unaccompanied youth who can build long-term and authentic relationships with caring adults
www.hudexchange.info/...
this teen is here and staying voluntarily. i do have 7 years of nursing education to the masters level so do have much training and experience with these, but didn’t have or raise any kids. I am on the fast track of learning this stuff because the situation is in my home for 3 months now.
(Obama instituted this in 2010, the other resources here i do believe flowed from this initiative of his “It is simply unacceptable for individuals, children, families and our nation’s Veterans to be faced with homelessness in this country. president obama june 18, 2009” : )
https://www.usich.gov/resources/uploads/asset_library/USICH_OpeningDoors_Amendment2015_FINAL.pdf as amended in 2015 (PIT=point in time)
The 2014 PIT count included estimates of the number of children and youth experiencing homelessness. Most children and youth experiencing homelessness(76 percent) counted in the 2014 PIT were accompanied by their family. There were 45,205 unaccompanied children and youth experiencing homelessness counted on a single night in January 2014. Unaccompanied children and youth counted in the PIT were roughly 12 percent of the total number of individuals counted in 2014. About 86 percent of unaccompanied children and youth (38,391 people) were between ages 18 to 24, and 14 percent (6,274 people) were under age 18. 21,470 unaccompanied children and youth were counted in unsheltered locations, and 23,735 were in shelters or transitional housing programs. Nearly 60 percent of all unaccompanied children and youth were counted in three states: California,Florida, and Nevada. Given the difficulty of counting youth who experience homelessness, it is likely that this is a serious under count of the population,including youth in unsheltered and doubled-up living arrangements. ED data shows that approximately 112,093 youth lived on the streets and other public places, cars, abandoned buildings, or stayed in hotels or motels during the 2012-2013 school year. The same data set also shows that 75,940 unaccompanied youth were enrolled in public schools. In addition to unaccompanied youth, more than 9 percent of people experiencing homelessness in families are between ages 18 to 24, most of whom are young parents accompanied by their children.29 About one percent of all children experiencing homelessness are in multi-child households that do not include an adult age 18 or older.30 A family experiencing homelessness that consists of a parent under age 18 and his/her child is considered a multi-child household. U.S. Department of Labor programs for low-income youth, including Job Corps, Youth Build, and programs funded by the Workforce Investment Act (WIA) Youth Formula grants to states and localities served a total of 14,548 youth experiencing homelessness during the 2012 program year. Most unaccompanied youth experiencing homelessness,particularly those in at-risk groups, have significant experience with trauma.31 Traumatic experiences can include multiple types of abuse, neglect, and exposure to violence. Youth often leave home as a result of a severe family conflict, which may include physical and/or sexual abuse.
There are two programs for 18-24 year olds in oregon-portland and medford. “My” teen agrees she lacks the following identified skills needed to live independently.
Make it easier to create host homes and to allow people willing to take in a homeless youth on a temporary basis to do so while ensuring youth safety. Provide host training, support, and safety standards.
Youth typically lack independent living skills such as money management and housekeeping, and they lack experience interfacing with landlords, government agencies, and other institutions……………
Policy and System Changes Ø Expand the state definition of homeless youth to include youth through age 24. Ø Mandate effective discharge and transition planning from child welfare,juvenile justice, hospitals, and other institutions to ensure that youth aren’t discharged into homelessness. Monitor and evaluate the outcomes of youth transitions from institutional care to ensure accountability
www.oregon.gov/...
i will be looking for the training that hosts receive, portland appears way understaffed and overworked and there may be an issue with “teen is out of their county” for providing resources.
https://www.pewtrusts.org/en/research-and-analysis/blogs/stateline/2017/07/07/a-hidden-population-youth-homelessness-is-on-the-rise
…….As she sees it, a good way to keep homeless and runaway youth out of adult shelters is to place them in host homes, with individuals or couples, whether they have children of their own or not. It’s an approach that Project Oz has used since 1985. There are similar programs in several other states, including Maryland, Minnesota and Nebraska.
Host families undergo 40 hours of training by the state, where they learn everything from how to deal with a child who has experienced trauma to nurturing techniques to conflict resolution, and additional training by the agency before they are licensed. (They are also required to get continuing education courses every couple of years.) Families are reimbursed for expenses and are paid a flat fee when they are required to be on call.
In return, the families provide shelter, food, clothing and a ride to school, usually for no more than 21 days. Meanwhile, social workers work with the youth to help them come up with a long-term plan.
This option works best for older teens who are still minors, because older youth who’ve been living on their own tend to chafe at house rules, Thompson said. The idea is to divert teens from the foster care system, which can be expensive and doesn’t always result in independence for the teens, Thompson said.
(my bold/U/I because the “older” is here with me)
Since I was volunteering at our local teen residential shelter as a nurse practitioner it was known i had rooms to rent. I received a text from the staff the morning of Oct 29 that this teen needed to be out that day and did i have a room still, she had rent $ from community college grant and was in her first term. I was told “she is 18 and a responsible adult now”, when i asked what my responsibility was. She was brought over with her few belongings in the shelter truck. Having watched this teen for months improve her situation, I created a shared house room rental monthly agreement and she paid me a little deposit and two months rent, with her college grant funds she had just received.
The term ended the beginning of Dec., the rental agreement ended December 28th. I refused to carry on the monthly signed rental agreement because i did not have a responsible adult with independent living skills. I had a rebellious 18 yo. She is living here on a daily basis. This has not been easy. And it has been and is quite the learning experience for me.
How to foster gratitude, initiative, future planning for essentials: prescription refills, housekeeping-shopping, meal planning and prep, toiletries, Responsibility for ones behavior, stop pointing the finger blaming everything and everyone? trust. faith. nurturing self.
I AM SO GLAD SCHOOL IS BACK IN SESSION!!!!! She is very motivated by school where she thinks she wants to enter interior design, and her girlfriend. Obama’s program of lots of help for kids to get thru community college seems to be in place here. I told her i was asked to write this diary by a kos in the comment sections. I told her I could ask for financial help here, but she would need to name items with a price. First she didn’t want me to, fear over me writing her story. Though I had told her she would remain anonymous. Then the next day she comes home and in conversation rattles off a few items she needs and how much they would cost. The next day it dawns on me, she does want me to write the diary, so i asked and yes she did.
Thank you for listening.
I want to add my paypal link for any donations, any directions in how to do that, how folks can designate what they want money to go towards? how to stop it if needed?
UPDATE 1/19 Saturday. unfortunately, this teen stayed out overnight on a school night and didn’t let me know. Her excuse, she drank alcohol celebrating her birthday so she did the responsible thing and didn’t leave that house. She became a rager. No one gets to rage at me in my own home. I also told her it is illegal for anyone other than parent or guardian to serve alcohol to a minor. Alcohol and drugs frequently have bad repercussions, and this is one of them. so that was a poor decision to drink but a safe decision to stay put. I messaged her that she is unwilling to follow the host house program and interested in only following her own program so, she needs to do that elsewhere and asked her to leave by the 28th, she left within 12 hours. well, she showed up in a friends truck and in a huff quickly gathered her clothes and sleeping bag. leaving the room a mess, i boxed it up and put on porch, including all her toiletries, but i left the perishables in fridge and freezer. She has now taken everything except the food.
i pray for this homeless youth who is a bio male and prefers she pronoun and considers self a trans.
i did get her a job she is suppose to start 1/26 at the local grocery store.
I am a bit ticked at the teen shelter for telling me she was a responsible adult. I will be letting the young woman know that is totally inappropriate in the future. She was mentor program director and now is executive director-i helped her get that position…………………………………………….
i am posting this because someone asked me to address this issue.
I must say, the energy at my house is so much lighter, and i do feel a sense of relief.
I think she is a survivor and will persevere at her own resistant rebellious pace